WEBVTT
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Welcome to Ai+ Nova Smartphones presents
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India's Got Latent.
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Quick delivery partner, Flipkart Minutes.
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Protein partner, Avvatar Protein.
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Fragrance partner, Wild Stone.
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And District, make plans and go out.
Let's go!
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Fuck this shit now, man.
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Are we ready to start the show?
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Yeah!
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We have a banger panel for you.
You guys are gonna go crazy.
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Make some noise for Tanmay Bhat…
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Gurleen Pannu…
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Rahul Dua…
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and Karan Aujla!
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Let's go!
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Make some fucking noise!
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What a panel, man!
What a fucking great panel!
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Karan bhai, thank you
so much for coming, man.
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Thank you, guys. Thank you, bhai.
Thank you for having me.
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- Anything? Want some water?
- No, I'm good.
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Water is free on this show.
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I'll take some then, bhai.
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But, Karan bhai,
thank you so much for coming.
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You're such a legend,
and I can't believe you're here, bhai.
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Yeah, man, me too. I don't know
if I did the right thing coming here.
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But I'm already here, so…
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You're the funniest Punjabi
on the panel today.
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Karan bhai hangs out with Virat Kohli,
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and now he's on Latent.
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What's next?
Are you gonna go on Tanmay Reacts?
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Sometimes, you gotta downgrade in life.
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Also, Karan Aujla actually came
from Dubai for the show.
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Yeah, that's true.
All the way from Dubai.
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Thank you so much for doing that.
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Thank you, bhai. I'd come from anywhere.
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People usually head to Dubai
after the episode comes out.
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My flight is booked, man.
I'm leaving right after this.
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But I love you so much, Karan bhai.
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- Love you.
- Thank you so much for coming.
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- I can't believe you're here.
- Come on, man.
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I'm such a big fan
of Tanmay bhai. Thank you!
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Come on, man,
you were just about to win my heart.
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People call Karan Aujla "Song Machine."
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That's right.
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Karan, maybe also rent
a water machine at your shows?
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No, for that,
you gotta go to the ATM machine
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and then get water.
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Look who's talking, the FIR machines!
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- Man…
- Fucker!
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For those who don't know about this,
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I had a show here, a show in Mumbai.
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And it was a Holi event.
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And just to give you context--
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Imagine, no water at a Holi show!
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It wasn't my fault.
I don't even want to blame the team.
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Anyway, whoever's fault it was,
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we were low on water,
and it was expensive to get more.
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And I cannot hear the end of it.
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But after that, we came back stronger.
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We did Mumbai 2.0,
and a lot of people liked it.
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Did you guys go to his Mumbai show?
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- What's this?
- My product placement is solid too, man.
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- What's this?
- Try it, man. It's better than Avvatar.
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It says Zyro.
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It's named after Rahul Dua's
India tour sales.
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- Sorry, man.
- No, no, that's accurate.
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At least you're accurate this time.
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Yes.
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Alright, should we try it?
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No, have this one. It's better.
I know that one's not that great.
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Fair enough.
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It's actually pretty shit.
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Zyro--
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The joke loaded a bit late.
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- Anyway.
- He drank this when he wrote…
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I can't sleep
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Give it up for Karan Aujla!
What a fucking guy! Come on.
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- We also have Tanmay Bhat in the house.
- Let's go!
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But so happy to be here.
Karan, big fan of your music.
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- Thank you.
- What's your favorite song?
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My favorite-- I love one of the new songs.
"Take It Easy."
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Of course. That's what you've been doing
with your career.
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Yeah. I know you love "52 Bars"
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because you've been behind them.
So, shut the fuck up.
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My friend's dogged with charges
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But thank you so much for coming,
Tanmay bhai.
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I love you so much.
Along with the Song Machine,
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we have the Brand Machine.
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- Look at this bastard.
- He has six brands himself.
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- That's you.
- My legal fees are huge, man.
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Same show on both YouTube and Netflix.
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And he calls me the Brand Machine.
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Samay Raina's the bigger sellout
than Aujla's shows.
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Oh, man.
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I have to make some money, after all.
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But, Gurleen, how are you feeling?
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You know, Gurleen is the biggest fan
of Karan bhai on the panel.
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Yes, that's true.
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She spent an hour getting ready
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just to be here, for real.
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A whole hour.
What were you doing for an hour?
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Whatever you were doing.
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By the way, we had
the same makeup artist, so…
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So it's not their fault then.
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So, it's like, we also got
the Desi Bling treatment.
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No, you look great, Gurleen.
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- Thank you so much for coming.
- Thank you.
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And we also have Rahul Dua.
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Thanks, bhai. Thank you.
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Thank you. Thanks a lot.
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Before he makes a joke, thank you.
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Thank you so much for having me here.
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I'm very happy to be here.
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No, I was going to promote your show.
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He just made a show called Pitch Please.
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It's a play on the phrase "Bitch, please."
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He swapped the B for a P. You get it?
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So, to enjoy an hour of such comedy,
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you can go to Rahul Dua's show
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happening all across the world
now, apparently.
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No.
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No. Not happening anywhere anymore.
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I chose to end the run,
unlike some shows…
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that…
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But how much do you love Aujla, man?
Come on.
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Bhai, I'm a huge fan.
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I actually listen to his songs
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and even analyze them in-depth.
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For example…
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Your lyrics are really good, paaji.
You're called "Song Machine."
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- Yeah.
- But I think you should slow down a bit.
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You should listen to your lyrics.
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Because in the first line, you write,
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"A Jat does only two things,
drink and sleep."
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But then in the next line,
you say to a girl,
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"I'm always free for you,
even when I have no time to sleep."
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First, you say you only drink or sleep.
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But then you also say you cannot sleep.
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- That's how I am.
- So…
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to enjoy an hour…
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- of such humor…
- Of analytical… talent.
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you can go to Rahul Dua's show…
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happening at the nearest
15-seater around you.
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Fuck.
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Alright.
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So, before a fight breaks out
as it does at any Karan Aujla concert,
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let's give a shout-out
to our brand, Ai+ phone.
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This is the phone sponsoring our show.
00:07:33.200 --> 00:07:34.920 align:center
And I've seen at your shows, a lot of--
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- Please, no.
- No, hear me out.
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A lot of phones get stolen at your shows.
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- Right?
- Yes.
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So tell your audience
to buy the Ai+ phones.
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Because it's a phone
no one wants to steal.
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Now its founder won't be able
to sleep either.
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He sponsored the wrong show.
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But should we begin India's Got Latent?
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Let's go!
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Alright, make some noise
for the first act, Sweethin Hartman.
00:08:10.680 --> 00:08:12.400 align:center
- Sweethin.
- Sweethin Hartman.
00:08:12.480 --> 00:08:14.360 align:center
- Sweethin Hartman.
- Guys, make some noise! Come on!
00:08:14.440 --> 00:08:15.680 align:center
Let's go!
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- Wow!
- Wow.
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- Wow! Damn!
- Wow.
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- That was sax… ophone.
- Wow.
00:09:51.360 --> 00:09:52.240 align:center
Yeah.
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When he started,
it felt like I was in an elevator.
00:09:56.160 --> 00:09:57.000 align:center
Yeah.
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Bhai, as the only musician on the panel,
what did you think
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- about this, Tanmay Bhat?
- No, I--
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I quite enjoyed it, man.
00:10:07.080 --> 00:10:09.000 align:center
- That was amazing. Really good.
- Thank you so much.
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But do you sing--
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Welcome to India's Got Talent, Karan.
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Fuck!
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Song Without Machine.
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That was great. Why did you bother
learning this in our country?
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I think I just had an itch
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to put an instrument in my mouth
and do some fingering…
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Can I give you something else?
00:10:34.040 --> 00:10:35.280 align:center
Yeah, give it to me.
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I'll charge you for it.
00:10:37.680 --> 00:10:38.840 align:center
Okay…
00:10:38.920 --> 00:10:41.080 align:center
Here's some Avvatar Protein for you.
Here you go.
00:10:41.960 --> 00:10:44.440 align:center
Put it in your pocket.
You can put it in your mouth later.
00:10:46.160 --> 00:10:47.760 align:center
Karan bhai, do you play any instrument?
00:10:47.840 --> 00:10:49.280 align:center
No, I don't play anything.
00:10:49.360 --> 00:10:51.320 align:center
But I want to say something.
00:10:51.400 --> 00:10:53.880 align:center
Karan bhai, we've met before.
00:10:54.360 --> 00:10:56.280 align:center
Do you remember the ad shoot?
00:10:56.360 --> 00:10:58.240 align:center
- Oh, you were in it?
- Yeah.
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Did you enjoy it?
00:11:07.240 --> 00:11:09.240 align:center
But really, you're pretty good.
00:11:10.080 --> 00:11:11.560 align:center
Thank you, bhai. Thank you, thank you.
00:11:11.880 --> 00:11:13.040 align:center
So what happened there?
00:11:14.440 --> 00:11:17.640 align:center
He got there, I performed.
And then he left, that's all.
00:11:17.720 --> 00:11:20.120 align:center
- Oh, wow!
- Didn't even talk or take photos. Nothing.
00:11:20.200 --> 00:11:23.080 align:center
Oh, man, and look,
you're on the show today. That's great.
00:11:23.680 --> 00:11:24.960 align:center
- Well--
- You won't get a photo even today.
00:11:29.920 --> 00:11:32.880 align:center
And he's written here,
"I have almost choked a classmate
00:11:32.960 --> 00:11:35.000 align:center
while strangling him with my bare hands."
00:11:35.160 --> 00:11:36.200 align:center
Did he refuse to put it in your mouth?
00:11:37.040 --> 00:11:37.960 align:center
No.
00:11:38.400 --> 00:11:40.280 align:center
I didn't know anything back then.
00:11:40.360 --> 00:11:42.440 align:center
No, what was this?
You almost choked a classmate?
00:11:42.520 --> 00:11:43.360 align:center
Karan bhai…
00:11:44.800 --> 00:11:46.720 align:center
This guy makes love songs.
00:11:47.480 --> 00:11:50.120 align:center
So what happened, man?
You almost choked a classmate
00:11:50.200 --> 00:11:51.560 align:center
by strangling him? What did he do?
00:11:51.880 --> 00:11:55.000 align:center
So, we had a fight,
and I got really angry.
00:11:55.080 --> 00:11:56.960 align:center
And I don't know what happened.
Next thing I know, I'm, like,
00:11:57.240 --> 00:11:59.760 align:center
pushing him to the wall
and choking him, trying to kill him.
00:11:59.840 --> 00:12:01.440 align:center
But I was really scared after, thinking
00:12:01.600 --> 00:12:04.480 align:center
that if he had died, I wouldn't be here.
I would have been in jail, maybe.
00:12:04.560 --> 00:12:05.480 align:center
Not maybe.
00:12:05.560 --> 00:12:07.080 align:center
- Yes, not "maybe."
- Yes.
00:12:07.160 --> 00:12:09.240 align:center
Damn, bro. Let's avoid these topics.
00:12:10.800 --> 00:12:12.440 align:center
The police are very strict there.
00:12:12.520 --> 00:12:14.320 align:center
The police here
are also very strict, bhai.
00:12:17.000 --> 00:12:18.840 align:center
Here, the police arrive in 30 minutes.
00:12:19.280 --> 00:12:20.960 align:center
- Yeah.
- I know.
00:12:21.960 --> 00:12:24.800 align:center
But if you order on Flipkart Minutes,
the police arrive in ten minutes.
00:12:29.120 --> 00:12:30.760 align:center
"The police are here, they're here!"
00:12:31.680 --> 00:12:33.360 align:center
Any charges against you?
00:12:33.920 --> 00:12:35.800 align:center
Yeah, I've had my share.
00:12:36.360 --> 00:12:37.320 align:center
What did you do?
00:12:37.400 --> 00:12:40.000 align:center
Nothing on the same level as you did.
00:12:40.200 --> 00:12:41.760 align:center
- Why? Did you--
- I never asked,
00:12:41.840 --> 00:12:43.080 align:center
"Would you rather this or that?"
00:12:44.240 --> 00:12:45.240 align:center
What did you do then?
00:12:45.320 --> 00:12:47.880 align:center
I said, "I'm a… gabru!"
00:12:48.400 --> 00:12:50.240 align:center
- An FIR for that?
- Yeah, man.
00:12:50.320 --> 00:12:51.360 align:center
For that?!
00:12:51.480 --> 00:12:53.440 align:center
- Yeah, man.
- For saying that word?
00:12:53.520 --> 00:12:54.640 align:center
- Yeah.
- So what did you do?
00:12:55.320 --> 00:12:56.240 align:center
Flew to Dubai.
00:13:02.440 --> 00:13:03.520 align:center
Good one, man.
00:13:05.200 --> 00:13:06.800 align:center
Gurleen, no FIRs against you?
00:13:07.280 --> 00:13:08.800 align:center
And I don't want any!
00:13:09.120 --> 00:13:12.280 align:center
I want to tell the editor,
"Please edit this well. He doesn't care."
00:13:17.880 --> 00:13:20.880 align:center
- I don't want an FIR.
- Rahul Dua, don't you have jokes?
00:13:22.440 --> 00:13:25.280 align:center
- Come on.
- Everyone who made jokes last season
00:13:25.600 --> 00:13:28.320 align:center
went from H for Habitat
to H for holding cell.
00:13:29.080 --> 00:13:30.520 align:center
For one hour…
00:13:36.120 --> 00:13:37.320 align:center
I love you, Rahul Dua.
00:13:37.400 --> 00:13:39.040 align:center
Yes. Wish I could say the same.
00:13:41.800 --> 00:13:42.720 align:center
Gurleen Pannu,
00:13:42.840 --> 00:13:44.240 align:center
- maybe only you can abuse him now.
- Yes?
00:13:44.480 --> 00:13:45.920 align:center
Him? No way.
00:13:46.320 --> 00:13:49.800 align:center
No, I want to hear him sing.
It says he also sings.
00:13:49.880 --> 00:13:52.000 align:center
Yes, sing something that's copyright-free.
00:13:52.240 --> 00:13:53.160 align:center
Copyright-free?
00:13:53.280 --> 00:13:54.960 align:center
Maybe one of his.
Bhai, do you have rights to your songs?
00:13:55.040 --> 00:13:56.160 align:center
Yes, all of them.
00:13:56.240 --> 00:13:58.520 align:center
Sing that one then…
Sing "G.O.A.T."
00:14:00.560 --> 00:14:01.440 align:center
No?
00:14:01.560 --> 00:14:03.080 align:center
- I--
- I weigh it with diamonds
00:14:03.160 --> 00:14:05.000 align:center
- Well, that's Diljit's.
- Right, right.
00:14:07.160 --> 00:14:09.440 align:center
- Alright.
- One minute.
00:14:09.520 --> 00:14:11.160 align:center
- He wrote-- He wrote it.
- No, wait.
00:14:11.240 --> 00:14:13.760 align:center
I wrote that song.
Auntie, don't get too happy!
00:14:14.680 --> 00:14:16.440 align:center
She was laughing the most.
00:14:16.880 --> 00:14:19.760 align:center
Bhai, all these rappers
just write songs for each other.
00:14:20.520 --> 00:14:22.040 align:center
Paaji, who wrote "Brown Rang"?
00:14:24.200 --> 00:14:26.800 align:center
- You must know.
- Sing that one…
00:14:27.280 --> 00:14:29.360 align:center
Girl, after three drinks…
00:14:29.440 --> 00:14:31.640 align:center
- You have the rights to it?
- That's not me either.
00:14:33.440 --> 00:14:35.080 align:center
Then what did you sing?
00:14:36.720 --> 00:14:39.200 align:center
- I can't sleep…
- Yeah, that one.
00:14:39.520 --> 00:14:41.560 align:center
- Sing "Neend Ni Aundi."
- Do you know any Karan Aujla songs?
00:14:41.640 --> 00:14:43.680 align:center
- Don't sing any of mine.
- Please, man.
00:14:43.760 --> 00:14:45.320 align:center
- No, man.
- Let's hear one without autotune.
00:14:51.080 --> 00:14:53.680 align:center
- Bhai, I love your lips, man.
- I--
00:14:58.000 --> 00:15:00.480 align:center
You've written,
"Mangalore cuisine is the best in India."
00:15:00.560 --> 00:15:01.600 align:center
- Yes.
- Now, that's a fight.
00:15:01.680 --> 00:15:04.560 align:center
So, Delhi girl here.
There's a Kashmiri boy here.
00:15:04.840 --> 00:15:05.880 align:center
Canada visa here.
00:15:06.200 --> 00:15:07.160 align:center
Okay?
00:15:07.880 --> 00:15:09.240 align:center
I'm from here, too.
00:15:09.320 --> 00:15:11.280 align:center
So, Punjabi cuisine is so good.
00:15:11.360 --> 00:15:13.440 align:center
There's Delhi's cuisine.
Ever had Kashmiri food?
00:15:13.960 --> 00:15:17.520 align:center
In Mangalore, you'll find communities
such as Shettys, Billavas,
00:15:17.960 --> 00:15:21.120 align:center
Beary Muslims, and Goan Catholics.
00:15:21.520 --> 00:15:24.760 align:center
Each culture has its own cuisine style.
00:15:24.840 --> 00:15:27.480 align:center
And down South,
it's become such a potpourri.
00:15:27.560 --> 00:15:29.480 align:center
You get such exquisite flavors.
00:15:29.680 --> 00:15:31.360 align:center
My mouth is watering, man.
00:15:31.440 --> 00:15:32.880 align:center
- See?
- So let's--
00:15:32.960 --> 00:15:35.000 align:center
Hand Samay a saxophone.
00:15:36.760 --> 00:15:37.880 align:center
Samay bhai, I love you, man.
00:15:39.040 --> 00:15:40.440 align:center
Say that after the joke lands.
00:15:44.600 --> 00:15:46.200 align:center
I cannot joke…
00:15:48.280 --> 00:15:50.640 align:center
Alright, make some noise
for Sweethin Hartman.
00:15:51.560 --> 00:15:52.480 align:center
Thank you.
00:15:54.320 --> 00:15:55.560 align:center
Time to score him.
00:15:56.680 --> 00:15:58.480 align:center
Brother, let's start with Rahul Dua.
00:15:59.880 --> 00:16:02.520 align:center
I'd like to give you a nine.
00:16:02.880 --> 00:16:03.720 align:center
- Thank you.
- A nine.
00:16:04.000 --> 00:16:05.520 align:center
A ten from me.
00:16:06.000 --> 00:16:06.920 align:center
Thank you.
00:16:09.640 --> 00:16:10.920 align:center
I'll give you a six.
00:16:11.000 --> 00:16:12.600 align:center
Just six?
00:16:13.400 --> 00:16:15.640 align:center
You gave him a six. That's not done.
00:16:15.720 --> 00:16:17.040 align:center
He loves putting things
in his mouth too much.
00:16:18.600 --> 00:16:20.440 align:center
Then I'll also give you a six.
00:16:21.440 --> 00:16:24.080 align:center
That brings your average to eight.
00:16:24.720 --> 00:16:25.840 align:center
He must have chosen nine.
00:16:26.120 --> 00:16:27.240 align:center
- Hey!
- Ten?!
00:16:27.320 --> 00:16:28.480 align:center
Oh, God!
00:16:28.560 --> 00:16:30.000 align:center
- Wow, what confidence.
- Not bad.
00:16:30.080 --> 00:16:32.280 align:center
- You rated yourself ten out of ten?
- Good.
00:16:32.600 --> 00:16:34.080 align:center
Thanks so much for joining,
I guess, Sweethin.
00:16:34.160 --> 00:16:35.080 align:center
- Thank you. My pleasure.
- Thank you.
00:16:35.160 --> 00:16:36.080 align:center
Thank you so much.
00:16:36.280 --> 00:16:37.240 align:center
Thank you.
00:16:37.320 --> 00:16:40.040 align:center
Make some noise for the next act,
Vijendra Rajak.
00:16:55.080 --> 00:16:56.280 align:center
Bro, please don't fall.
00:16:56.400 --> 00:16:57.800 align:center
This is how people try to see
00:16:57.880 --> 00:16:59.640 align:center
Karan Aujla's show
in the standing section.
00:17:02.840 --> 00:17:04.160 align:center
Bro, my ass is puckering.
00:17:05.400 --> 00:17:06.599 align:center
We can see his, too.
00:17:08.079 --> 00:17:09.319 align:center
Pull your pants up.
00:17:10.599 --> 00:17:11.560 align:center
Sorry, Gurleen.
00:17:13.319 --> 00:17:15.560 align:center
Oh, let's go!
00:17:25.599 --> 00:17:26.480 align:center
Bro, the--
00:17:27.680 --> 00:17:29.240 align:center
Oh, man!
00:17:30.680 --> 00:17:31.960 align:center
I thought he was about to go flying.
00:17:38.440 --> 00:17:40.000 align:center
Oh, my God.
00:17:41.680 --> 00:17:43.800 align:center
Wow, man! Guys, keep clapping!
00:17:49.600 --> 00:17:50.800 align:center
Bro, put it on your belly button.
00:17:57.240 --> 00:17:58.880 align:center
- Amazing!
- Wow!
00:17:59.760 --> 00:18:01.600 align:center
Bro, that was crazy.
00:18:02.520 --> 00:18:05.240 align:center
So, are you in a circus or something?
00:18:05.480 --> 00:18:08.000 align:center
No, I do acrobatics,
and I'm also a dance choreographer.
00:18:08.480 --> 00:18:10.920 align:center
I've done reality shows, too,
like India's Got Talent.
00:18:11.120 --> 00:18:13.160 align:center
Didn't you get famous
after India's Got Talent?
00:18:13.240 --> 00:18:16.000 align:center
Well, talent isn't appreciated
much in India.
00:18:16.320 --> 00:18:18.560 align:center
They only reward jackassery.
So, here I am.
00:18:23.400 --> 00:18:25.800 align:center
You wrote you've been married
for two years.
00:18:25.960 --> 00:18:29.440 align:center
- "Happily married." Her family--
- Happily? This is my happy.
00:18:29.720 --> 00:18:31.000 align:center
This is me after two years.
00:18:31.280 --> 00:18:34.160 align:center
- That must be from balancing tires.
- Oh, no. It happened after my marriage.
00:18:34.240 --> 00:18:37.400 align:center
Suddenly, I realized--
I didn't whisk her away…
00:18:37.560 --> 00:18:39.040 align:center
She-- Where did my wife go?
00:18:40.600 --> 00:18:41.800 align:center
Oh, I see.
00:18:43.960 --> 00:18:46.040 align:center
- Did she run away?
- She ran away!
00:18:46.400 --> 00:18:48.000 align:center
- I mean--
- Maybe spun away with the wheel!
00:18:48.080 --> 00:18:49.640 align:center
No, she whisked me away.
00:18:50.400 --> 00:18:51.640 align:center
- She did?
- Yes, she did.
00:18:51.720 --> 00:18:53.760 align:center
- You did?!
- Damn it!
00:18:53.840 --> 00:18:55.920 align:center
Ma'am, could you come up on stage, please?
00:18:56.000 --> 00:18:57.160 align:center
- We need to discuss this.
- Damn!
00:18:59.040 --> 00:19:01.560 align:center
She had to come get you.
Your tire doesn't even have a tube.
00:19:01.840 --> 00:19:02.760 align:center
I see!
00:19:03.520 --> 00:19:05.080 align:center
Give her a mic.
Ma'am, what's your name?
00:19:05.280 --> 00:19:07.080 align:center
- I'm Manju Rajak.
- Manju ji.
00:19:07.160 --> 00:19:09.320 align:center
Manju ji, were you the one
who whisked him away?
00:19:09.440 --> 00:19:11.680 align:center
- Yes, I did.
- What's the story? Tell us how you did it.
00:19:11.760 --> 00:19:15.920 align:center
We were in a relationship for a month,
and I wanted to get married.
00:19:16.000 --> 00:19:18.520 align:center
He wanted to get married, too.
It's not like he didn't want to.
00:19:18.800 --> 00:19:21.120 align:center
My family wouldn't approve.
00:19:21.200 --> 00:19:25.040 align:center
So, I was worried. I told him
my parents were against it.
00:19:25.360 --> 00:19:26.880 align:center
- Why were they against it?
- Well--
00:19:26.960 --> 00:19:30.600 align:center
Her brother-in-law is a bit…
He's a busybody.
00:19:30.680 --> 00:19:34.440 align:center
"You cannot marry him."
Despite his being a love marriage!
00:19:34.520 --> 00:19:36.880 align:center
- What does he do?
- He repairs phones.
00:19:36.960 --> 00:19:38.240 align:center
He hacks people's phones.
00:19:38.320 --> 00:19:39.840 align:center
- Really?
- He had hacked hers.
00:19:39.920 --> 00:19:41.200 align:center
- Okay.
- I'd text her "I love you,"
00:19:41.280 --> 00:19:42.200 align:center
and he'd reply.
00:19:42.280 --> 00:19:44.000 align:center
- Damn!
- That was stressful.
00:19:44.440 --> 00:19:46.040 align:center
- So--
- He would never let her respond.
00:19:46.120 --> 00:19:48.920 align:center
- So you lost hair because of the stress?
- No, what happened was,
00:19:49.120 --> 00:19:51.800 align:center
she asked me to meet her
at a sugarcane juice shop.
00:19:51.960 --> 00:19:54.400 align:center
She got into my car and asked me
to go to my sister's house.
00:19:54.480 --> 00:19:55.960 align:center
There, she says, "I want to marry you."
00:19:56.080 --> 00:19:58.480 align:center
I told her it was a bad idea.
"We are too young for that."
00:19:58.560 --> 00:20:00.920 align:center
"It's only been a month.
We should take our time."
00:20:01.120 --> 00:20:02.680 align:center
She said, "It's today or never."
00:20:03.160 --> 00:20:04.400 align:center
- Did you say that?
- Yes.
00:20:04.480 --> 00:20:06.680 align:center
I had to get married.
I had just bolted from home.
00:20:06.760 --> 00:20:08.720 align:center
Now you're going to need money
for the wedding.
00:20:08.800 --> 00:20:12.640 align:center
Even a temple wedding costs money.
For certificates and all that.
00:20:12.800 --> 00:20:15.200 align:center
A police complaint was filed there.
Cops were after me here.
00:20:15.280 --> 00:20:16.960 align:center
They nabbed my brother and everyone.
00:20:17.040 --> 00:20:18.000 align:center
- Why?
- They said…
00:20:18.080 --> 00:20:19.760 align:center
I took the girl by force.
00:20:20.000 --> 00:20:21.480 align:center
- Oh, shit.
- Even though it was her idea to elope.
00:20:23.480 --> 00:20:24.440 align:center
I was just about to say that.
00:20:24.520 --> 00:20:27.440 align:center
I called a friend and asked him for money.
00:20:27.520 --> 00:20:28.840 align:center
He said, "I can't even afford poison."
00:20:28.920 --> 00:20:31.280 align:center
I said, "Fine, I'll buy you the poison.
Just give me the money."
00:20:31.360 --> 00:20:32.960 align:center
"I've already got poison
stuck in my own throat."
00:20:34.400 --> 00:20:38.240 align:center
How could you trust him enough
to marry him after only a month?
00:20:38.320 --> 00:20:41.280 align:center
His nature and, you know…
00:20:41.360 --> 00:20:42.800 align:center
You look at someone and just feel…
00:20:42.880 --> 00:20:44.480 align:center
Like, wow. That feeling.
00:20:44.560 --> 00:20:45.960 align:center
Wow, he really rocks that balance board.
00:20:47.440 --> 00:20:48.840 align:center
What a balanced guy.
00:20:49.040 --> 00:20:50.960 align:center
- Wow.
- Does he pamper you?
00:20:51.040 --> 00:20:52.560 align:center
- Yes.
- Then spin you around?
00:20:52.640 --> 00:20:55.480 align:center
I spin him around, too.
00:21:00.000 --> 00:21:02.840 align:center
Right now, in our hotel washroom,
there's no door.
00:21:02.920 --> 00:21:04.000 align:center
I mean, there's no latch.
00:21:04.080 --> 00:21:05.280 align:center
Yeah, Habitat is like that.
00:21:05.360 --> 00:21:08.000 align:center
The thing is,
this happens at my house too.
00:21:08.080 --> 00:21:11.240 align:center
I go to the washroom. She checks on me.
"Are you in the middle of it?"
00:21:11.320 --> 00:21:13.680 align:center
I said, "Come inside.
We can share the toilet seat."
00:21:14.760 --> 00:21:18.040 align:center
Give me a break in the washroom.
I'm not going anywhere.
00:21:18.160 --> 00:21:20.320 align:center
I was supposed to come here alone.
She said, "I'll come too."
00:21:20.400 --> 00:21:22.000 align:center
Do you not trust him?
00:21:22.080 --> 00:21:24.480 align:center
I do, but there's this feeling that…
00:21:24.640 --> 00:21:26.640 align:center
I need to stay close to him.
00:21:26.720 --> 00:21:28.520 align:center
- I have to stay around him.
- So cute.
00:21:28.600 --> 00:21:30.240 align:center
It's just that I can't stay alone.
00:21:30.320 --> 00:21:31.400 align:center
I can't be without him.
00:21:31.920 --> 00:21:33.480 align:center
- That's it.
- Wow!
00:21:33.760 --> 00:21:36.680 align:center
Because her family blocked her.
I mean, they thought--
00:21:42.880 --> 00:21:44.560 align:center
There's no one else to talk to.
00:21:45.360 --> 00:21:47.960 align:center
- Manju ji, you seem like such a romantic.
- Yes.
00:21:48.040 --> 00:21:49.840 align:center
Does he ever do anything romantic
for you?
00:21:50.400 --> 00:21:51.360 align:center
He's done a lot.
00:21:51.440 --> 00:21:53.320 align:center
Tell us something romantic he's done.
00:21:53.400 --> 00:21:55.560 align:center
Or did he run a tire over your heart?
00:22:00.080 --> 00:22:02.080 align:center
He gets really shy.
00:22:02.160 --> 00:22:03.880 align:center
- He's the shy type.
- Yeah?
00:22:04.080 --> 00:22:06.720 align:center
No, it's my first time
speaking this openly.
00:22:06.960 --> 00:22:08.680 align:center
Usually, I just perform and leave.
00:22:08.960 --> 00:22:10.520 align:center
- Perform, run.
- That's obvious, bro.
00:22:10.600 --> 00:22:11.920 align:center
She said such sweet things,
00:22:12.000 --> 00:22:16.800 align:center
and the moment you got a chance, you went,
"Her uncle fucked me over."
00:22:16.880 --> 00:22:18.160 align:center
"Then I was just done."
00:22:18.240 --> 00:22:19.920 align:center
"Listen to me. Just hear me out."
00:22:21.040 --> 00:22:24.000 align:center
Your life goal is to take
your wife to the Maldives.
00:22:24.240 --> 00:22:25.120 align:center
- Yes.
- Why is that?
00:22:25.200 --> 00:22:28.200 align:center
Why is going to the Maldives
such a big dream for you?
00:22:28.520 --> 00:22:30.640 align:center
Looks nice in videos.
That's all I've seen.
00:22:30.720 --> 00:22:32.600 align:center
- It would make you both very happy, right?
- Yes.
00:22:33.280 --> 00:22:36.600 align:center
Okay, I'll sponsor
your tickets to the Maldives.
00:22:39.120 --> 00:22:40.000 align:center
For sure, bro.
00:22:40.600 --> 00:22:43.200 align:center
- Wow, man. What a great gesture, paaji.
- Bro…
00:22:43.280 --> 00:22:44.400 align:center
- Really, man.
- There's water everywhere there.
00:22:44.480 --> 00:22:45.840 align:center
- Water everywhere.
- Water everywhere.
00:22:47.560 --> 00:22:48.560 align:center
Everywhere you go, water.
00:22:48.800 --> 00:22:50.040 align:center
That's so sweet of you.
00:22:50.120 --> 00:22:51.680 align:center
- No worries.
- Let's hear it for Karan bhai!
00:22:51.760 --> 00:22:53.880 align:center
No, no, it's…
00:22:54.040 --> 00:22:56.680 align:center
Look, sometimes we get
very ungrateful.
00:22:57.080 --> 00:22:59.520 align:center
So yeah, man, why not?
If you can do something for this
00:22:59.680 --> 00:23:01.760 align:center
- beautiful couple…
- Thank you, sir.
00:23:01.840 --> 00:23:04.760 align:center
It's because of your wife. Not you.
00:23:05.160 --> 00:23:06.840 align:center
I get everything because of her now.
00:23:06.920 --> 00:23:09.720 align:center
- Don't take your wheel there.
- Yes.
00:23:09.800 --> 00:23:12.240 align:center
Spinning your wheel in
the middle of the beach.
00:23:13.880 --> 00:23:15.440 align:center
- Okay?
- Yes, sir.
00:23:17.200 --> 00:23:20.120 align:center
If you don't mind, bro,
where's your next show?
00:23:20.560 --> 00:23:22.000 align:center
Sir, I don't have one right now.
00:23:22.080 --> 00:23:24.720 align:center
I have a lot of problems in my life.
00:23:24.800 --> 00:23:25.680 align:center
What happened?
00:23:25.920 --> 00:23:27.320 align:center
Right now, it's just the two of us.
00:23:27.400 --> 00:23:30.320 align:center
My family separated from us.
00:23:30.400 --> 00:23:31.840 align:center
Now we live in a rented place.
00:23:31.960 --> 00:23:34.360 align:center
We're both working, but our
debt has gotten out of hand.
00:23:34.560 --> 00:23:37.480 align:center
We borrowed from everywhere,
so we're totally ruined.
00:23:37.560 --> 00:23:39.880 align:center
I even pawned my
phone just to come here.
00:23:39.960 --> 00:23:42.000 align:center
Tell me, how much
debt are you in?
00:23:42.880 --> 00:23:43.800 align:center
Should I tell him?
00:23:43.880 --> 00:23:44.800 align:center
- Go ahead.
- Just tell him.
00:23:44.880 --> 00:23:46.520 align:center
Sir, it's 1.2 million rupees.
00:23:46.600 --> 00:23:47.440 align:center
I'm out.
00:23:53.480 --> 00:23:54.320 align:center
Paaji,
00:23:54.880 --> 00:23:57.080 align:center
I can't do that much. I'll try.
00:23:57.400 --> 00:23:59.840 align:center
But I hope you get so many shows
00:23:59.920 --> 00:24:01.520 align:center
- Of course…
- that you make that 1.2 million easily.
00:24:01.600 --> 00:24:03.240 align:center
- I'll work hard for it.
- Just look--
00:24:03.320 --> 00:24:07.040 align:center
Paaji, look at the camera and say,
"Please BookMyShow."
00:24:07.320 --> 00:24:08.200 align:center
Hey!
00:24:08.440 --> 00:24:10.120 align:center
Oh, man!
00:24:12.440 --> 00:24:15.480 align:center
- Just say, "Please BookMyShow."
- No, paaji, please.
00:24:17.000 --> 00:24:17.880 align:center
Damn!
00:24:17.960 --> 00:24:18.960 align:center
- Samay bhai!
- Yes?
00:24:19.040 --> 00:24:21.400 align:center
- Give him the Ai+ phone.
- Ai+ phone?
00:24:21.480 --> 00:24:23.000 align:center
Yeah, we can give it at the end.
00:24:23.160 --> 00:24:25.080 align:center
His phone is pawned.
Is yours pawned too, right?
00:24:25.160 --> 00:24:26.360 align:center
I mean, her phone, not mine.
00:24:26.440 --> 00:24:27.600 align:center
Her phone is pawned?
00:24:27.680 --> 00:24:30.040 align:center
- Her phone is pawned?!
- Mine is broken.
00:24:30.320 --> 00:24:32.280 align:center
First, tell us why you pawned it.
00:24:32.360 --> 00:24:35.120 align:center
Sir, I had to come here,
and I had absolutely no money.
00:24:35.200 --> 00:24:36.760 align:center
- I haven't even paid rent yet.
- Didn't we pay for your travel?
00:24:36.840 --> 00:24:37.760 align:center
- That's taken care of.
- We paid for it, right?
00:24:37.840 --> 00:24:40.000 align:center
Yes, but I still have to
get to the station from here.
00:24:40.080 --> 00:24:42.960 align:center
We'll pay for that too.
We don't just give one-way tickets.
00:24:43.120 --> 00:24:44.040 align:center
- There are other--
- Did you think
00:24:44.120 --> 00:24:45.840 align:center
Karan bhai would just leave you
stranded in the Maldives?
00:24:47.280 --> 00:24:49.080 align:center
- He'll cover your return trip too, man.
- Yeah, man.
00:24:54.880 --> 00:24:56.080 align:center
That's for you.
00:24:57.960 --> 00:24:59.240 align:center
- Thank you, sir.
- Thank you.
00:24:59.320 --> 00:25:00.320 align:center
There you go.
00:25:00.560 --> 00:25:01.840 align:center
Now don't pawn this one.
00:25:02.160 --> 00:25:03.200 align:center
You won't get anything for it.
00:25:06.000 --> 00:25:08.800 align:center
Vijendra bhai,
she spoke so highly of you.
00:25:08.880 --> 00:25:10.320 align:center
Tell us about Manju ji too.
00:25:10.400 --> 00:25:12.240 align:center
What are her best qualities?
00:25:12.320 --> 00:25:14.400 align:center
Out of everyone
who's been in my life,
00:25:14.800 --> 00:25:16.720 align:center
she's the--
I mean, among all the girls,
00:25:16.800 --> 00:25:18.440 align:center
she's the loveliest.
00:25:18.520 --> 00:25:20.320 align:center
- How many girls have you dated?
- What a lousy compliment.
00:25:20.400 --> 00:25:21.400 align:center
I asked you to praise her,
00:25:21.480 --> 00:25:23.560 align:center
and you say you had
many girls in your life.
00:25:23.640 --> 00:25:25.720 align:center
- No, I mean-- I mean…
- "She's the loveliest of all the girls."
00:25:26.280 --> 00:25:27.960 align:center
She never doubts
me or gets angry.
00:25:28.040 --> 00:25:30.280 align:center
With how things are, other girls--
00:25:30.360 --> 00:25:33.160 align:center
- Right, she never "doubts" him.
- Never doubts you, and never--?
00:25:33.640 --> 00:25:35.600 align:center
- Karan paaji!
- What a dirty mind, man!
00:25:35.680 --> 00:25:36.920 align:center
- Wait…
- Karan, man!
00:25:39.000 --> 00:25:39.960 align:center
Paaji…
00:25:40.640 --> 00:25:42.840 align:center
Did your ex-girlfriends doubt you a lot?
00:25:43.400 --> 00:25:44.320 align:center
Yes.
00:25:45.160 --> 00:25:48.320 align:center
- You never doubted him, Manju ji?
- No, I've never…
00:25:48.960 --> 00:25:50.600 align:center
No, she just has a great nature.
00:25:50.680 --> 00:25:53.200 align:center
I'm broke. Any other girl would leave.
00:25:53.280 --> 00:25:54.600 align:center
Things are tough right now,
00:25:54.680 --> 00:25:56.280 align:center
but she's always by my side.
She says--
00:25:56.360 --> 00:25:57.920 align:center
You pawned her phone, bro.
00:25:58.160 --> 00:25:59.640 align:center
And her family has blocked her!
00:25:59.760 --> 00:26:01.200 align:center
How could she even leave?
00:26:01.720 --> 00:26:06.040 align:center
She wants to run away,
but this guy pawned all her stuff.
00:26:06.120 --> 00:26:07.480 align:center
"I don't have my belongings with me."
00:26:07.560 --> 00:26:08.760 align:center
It's for a reason, man.
00:26:09.200 --> 00:26:11.240 align:center
No, no, it's not like that.
00:26:11.320 --> 00:26:12.240 align:center
She's very sweet.
00:26:12.320 --> 00:26:15.040 align:center
- You guys are definitely--
- My sister likes her.
00:26:15.320 --> 00:26:18.880 align:center
- They treat her really well.
- That's really great, man.
00:26:18.960 --> 00:26:20.960 align:center
Give it up for Vijendra bhai!
00:26:21.040 --> 00:26:22.200 align:center
Thank you, sir. Thank you.
00:26:23.000 --> 00:26:26.360 align:center
Time to score Vijendra Rajak bhai.
Let's start with Rahul Dua.
00:26:26.760 --> 00:26:29.080 align:center
Bro, I want to give
a full ten out of ten.
00:26:29.200 --> 00:26:32.000 align:center
- For the act, and for the personality too.
- Thank you, sir.
00:26:32.120 --> 00:26:34.080 align:center
And for this very cute
couple dynamic of yours.
00:26:34.160 --> 00:26:37.120 align:center
- I really enjoyed interacting with you.
- Thank you.
00:26:37.240 --> 00:26:38.200 align:center
Ten points, bro.
00:26:38.280 --> 00:26:40.040 align:center
- A full ten for both of you.
- Thank you.
00:26:40.120 --> 00:26:43.200 align:center
- I gave extra points for your personality…
- Okay, thank you.
00:26:43.280 --> 00:26:44.200 align:center
I'll give an eight.
00:26:44.280 --> 00:26:46.360 align:center
- To keep it balanced. An eight.
- Yes.
00:26:46.480 --> 00:26:47.840 align:center
- Yeah, got to work out the average too.
- Eight out of ten.
00:26:47.960 --> 00:26:49.160 align:center
Yeah, I'll give a nine.
00:26:50.120 --> 00:26:52.080 align:center
Bro, I give you ten out of ten.
00:26:52.160 --> 00:26:53.800 align:center
- I really liked you both.
- Yes, sir.
00:26:54.080 --> 00:26:56.360 align:center
- What if he gave himself a ten?
- Who knows?
00:26:56.640 --> 00:26:59.280 align:center
That makes your average 9.5.
00:26:59.720 --> 00:27:00.600 align:center
Oh, no!
00:27:00.680 --> 00:27:01.680 align:center
Oh, man!
00:27:01.760 --> 00:27:03.520 align:center
I'm thinking of
changing my score.
00:27:03.760 --> 00:27:06.880 align:center
- Let's change it.
- What's the number, bro?
00:27:07.360 --> 00:27:09.040 align:center
- What is it?
- Nine!
00:27:09.160 --> 00:27:13.640 align:center
- You chose nine! Oh, man!
- Oh!
00:27:14.320 --> 00:27:16.840 align:center
- Bro--
- At first I also thought about giving 9.5.
00:27:16.920 --> 00:27:18.320 align:center
Then I went with nine.
00:27:18.520 --> 00:27:20.560 align:center
Since you didn't win--
We wanted you to.
00:27:20.840 --> 00:27:22.160 align:center
I want you to travel more,
00:27:22.240 --> 00:27:24.280 align:center
not just the Maldives,
but India too.
00:27:24.360 --> 00:27:27.840 align:center
So from District, I'm giving
you 50,000 District points.
00:27:27.920 --> 00:27:29.200 align:center
- 50,000.
- Okay. Thank you.
00:27:29.280 --> 00:27:31.720 align:center
So you can go to any restaurant
that accepts District
00:27:31.880 --> 00:27:34.640 align:center
and eat 50,000 rupees
worth of food whenever you want.
00:27:34.960 --> 00:27:37.080 align:center
- Sir, thank you.
- Let's fucking go, man.
00:27:37.160 --> 00:27:38.680 align:center
- Thank you.
- Thank you so much for joining,
00:27:38.760 --> 00:27:39.800 align:center
Vijendra Rajak bhai.
00:27:40.920 --> 00:27:42.400 align:center
I love you. All the best.
00:27:43.200 --> 00:27:45.600 align:center
- Oh, man.
- There you go!
00:28:00.240 --> 00:28:01.440 align:center
He's teasing Tanmay Bhat.
00:28:14.920 --> 00:28:15.880 align:center
Wow.
00:28:17.680 --> 00:28:20.040 align:center
- Oh, my God, bro.
- His waist disappeared.
00:28:20.120 --> 00:28:21.720 align:center
I feel like eating
noodles out of it.
00:28:24.400 --> 00:28:26.240 align:center
Bro, give him Avvatar Protein.
00:28:26.320 --> 00:28:28.320 align:center
Does he need it?
Just fucking take some from him.
00:28:33.240 --> 00:28:34.680 align:center
He's gonna do it on the table.
00:28:34.760 --> 00:28:36.040 align:center
- Oh, he's gonna arm wrestle.
- He wants to arm wrestle him.
00:28:36.120 --> 00:28:38.240 align:center
Let's go! Let's go!
00:28:39.280 --> 00:28:40.440 align:center
Oh, my God!
00:28:45.800 --> 00:28:47.560 align:center
Bro, he's having a
really bad day today.
00:28:48.440 --> 00:28:50.280 align:center
- Oh, man! Oh, fuck!
- Samay bhai, would you like to try?
00:28:50.360 --> 00:28:53.280 align:center
Bro, you're my security,
and you're losing to some random guy.
00:28:54.080 --> 00:28:55.240 align:center
Karan Aujla bhai.
00:28:55.880 --> 00:28:57.720 align:center
- Yes, bro.
- How do you like his body?
00:28:58.000 --> 00:28:58.960 align:center
No, I mean…
00:28:59.400 --> 00:29:01.760 align:center
What? Tread carefully.
Did you see his body?
00:29:02.680 --> 00:29:05.320 align:center
No, bro, that was a nice flex.
What can I even say?
00:29:05.400 --> 00:29:07.600 align:center
You're flexing too
with that five-crore watch.
00:29:11.560 --> 00:29:12.680 align:center
Bro, you should
pose like that too.
00:29:15.920 --> 00:29:18.200 align:center
Paaji, if none of my jokes land,
00:29:18.360 --> 00:29:19.840 align:center
just throw your watch at my face.
00:29:23.240 --> 00:29:24.400 align:center
Good one, Rahul.
00:29:25.120 --> 00:29:26.000 align:center
Bro!
00:29:26.120 --> 00:29:28.040 align:center
- Give me your watch.
- If I ruin your mood even more,
00:29:28.120 --> 00:29:30.440 align:center
kick me out immediately
in your private jet, bro.
00:29:31.040 --> 00:29:33.200 align:center
Like, "Kick him out,
I can't listen to him anymore."
00:29:34.000 --> 00:29:36.560 align:center
Deep Gopal Lokhande,
was all this that you did okay?
00:29:37.400 --> 00:29:39.760 align:center
- Well…
- Is this okay? Getting naked like this?
00:29:39.840 --> 00:29:41.920 align:center
Indecency and obscenity in public?
00:29:42.000 --> 00:29:43.480 align:center
- I'm over 18, so it's fine.
- What?
00:29:43.560 --> 00:29:44.440 align:center
I'm over 18.
00:29:44.640 --> 00:29:45.600 align:center
- So?
- So?
00:29:45.720 --> 00:29:47.120 align:center
- I mean-- Naked…
- You can roam naked if you're over 18?
00:29:47.400 --> 00:29:48.520 align:center
Half naked, half naked.
00:29:48.600 --> 00:29:49.920 align:center
This isn't right, bro.
00:29:50.480 --> 00:29:53.080 align:center
Bro, you're flexing so hard,
don't you get muscle cramps?
00:29:53.160 --> 00:29:55.320 align:center
I mean, when you overtrain--
00:30:01.000 --> 00:30:02.000 align:center
The power is out!
00:30:04.240 --> 00:30:05.440 align:center
Mumbai Police!
00:30:11.360 --> 00:30:12.240 align:center
Hello, hello.
00:30:12.320 --> 00:30:14.680 align:center
Hello! Friends, the power went
out in the middle of the show.
00:30:16.680 --> 00:30:18.560 align:center
Bro, did you see what
your nudity caused?
00:30:21.360 --> 00:30:22.720 align:center
Even the electricity got embarrassed.
00:30:23.080 --> 00:30:24.800 align:center
Will the power come back? Tushar?
00:30:25.000 --> 00:30:26.080 align:center
Tickets for the next show!
00:30:26.360 --> 00:30:28.160 align:center
It'll come back.
It won't stay like this.
00:30:28.680 --> 00:30:29.720 align:center
It's Mumbai city, man.
00:30:29.800 --> 00:30:31.720 align:center
- Aujla gave one too.
- Yes!
00:30:40.160 --> 00:30:41.040 align:center
Check, check.
00:30:42.280 --> 00:30:43.120 align:center
Is this off too?
00:30:44.000 --> 00:30:46.080 align:center
Bro, I was making so
much fun of your show.
00:30:47.360 --> 00:30:49.520 align:center
- Sorry, paaji.
- Karma is a bitch!
00:30:53.160 --> 00:30:54.080 align:center
What is this?
00:30:54.520 --> 00:30:56.120 align:center
Did Flipkart Minutes
deliver this so fast?
00:30:59.760 --> 00:31:02.680 align:center
Guys, the power may go,
but brand integration shouldn't.
00:31:04.480 --> 00:31:05.880 align:center
- Here you go, man.
- He's been--
00:31:05.960 --> 00:31:08.080 align:center
He's been cursed by BeerBiceps.
00:31:12.840 --> 00:31:15.040 align:center
- Paaji, sing us a few songs.
- Yes, paaji!
00:31:15.480 --> 00:31:17.080 align:center
Okay!
00:31:20.000 --> 00:31:22.720 align:center
Who is sitting here?
Show me her face first.
00:31:22.800 --> 00:31:23.880 align:center
Who is she?
00:31:24.720 --> 00:31:26.880 align:center
- There you are!
- Big fan!
00:31:26.960 --> 00:31:28.440 align:center
- Big fan!
- The mic is working.
00:31:28.520 --> 00:31:31.240 align:center
Will you sing with me?
Which one? "Boyfriend"?
00:31:31.360 --> 00:31:33.040 align:center
Yes, "Boyfriend."
Done.
00:31:33.120 --> 00:31:35.600 align:center
- Together-- You'll have to sing with me.
- I will.
00:31:35.840 --> 00:31:37.440 align:center
- Come on stage, sister.
- Sure? Come on.
00:31:37.520 --> 00:31:38.560 align:center
- She will.
- Come here.
00:31:39.520 --> 00:31:40.480 align:center
Let's go.
00:31:42.440 --> 00:31:44.000 align:center
There you go!
00:31:44.400 --> 00:31:45.320 align:center
Wow.
00:31:45.560 --> 00:31:46.720 align:center
Can we sing "Winning Speech"?
00:31:46.800 --> 00:31:49.320 align:center
Oh, snap! She's coming in strong.
00:31:49.400 --> 00:31:50.840 align:center
Let's start with "Boyfriend" first.
00:31:50.920 --> 00:31:51.840 align:center
Okay.
00:31:52.520 --> 00:31:55.320 align:center
- Come on, guys.
- Let's all give a beat. Okay? One, two…
00:31:58.040 --> 00:31:59.480 align:center
No, I'll just sing without it.
00:32:27.520 --> 00:32:29.880 align:center
Bravo, bravo, bravo!
00:32:31.600 --> 00:32:34.760 align:center
Oh, okay.
So you ended up needing me after all.
00:32:35.920 --> 00:32:37.920 align:center
Alright, alright, alright.
00:32:38.960 --> 00:32:41.640 align:center
- Alright. Should I sing one more?
- Yes!
00:32:43.240 --> 00:32:45.600 align:center
Sing along, whoever knows it here.
00:32:46.000 --> 00:32:47.320 align:center
- Let's go.
- Come on.
00:33:09.000 --> 00:33:11.880 align:center
- Amazing. Girl knows all the songs.
- I'm a big fan!
00:33:11.960 --> 00:33:13.400 align:center
Thank you, man. Thank you so much.
00:33:13.800 --> 00:33:14.640 align:center
Done.
00:33:14.760 --> 00:33:16.440 align:center
Alright, let's go downstairs
and freshen up a bit.
00:33:16.520 --> 00:33:17.400 align:center
- Let's go.
- Yes.
00:33:17.480 --> 00:33:18.600 align:center
- Let's go.
- Okay, we'll--
00:33:18.800 --> 00:33:20.560 align:center
- One row at a time.
- What?
00:33:20.640 --> 00:33:21.920 align:center
One second. First, let them leave.
00:33:22.000 --> 00:33:24.080 align:center
Then, we'll…
I'll manage the crowd.
00:33:24.200 --> 00:33:26.360 align:center
You guys go downstairs,
just for 15 minutes.
00:33:27.680 --> 00:33:28.640 align:center
Wild scenes.
00:33:30.480 --> 00:33:33.400 align:center
Okay. See if Millers is open.
We can drink downstairs until then.
00:33:33.480 --> 00:33:36.240 align:center
- With us!
- Cheers!
00:33:36.320 --> 00:33:38.040 align:center
- Millers! Yeah.
- Millers? Millers it is.
00:33:38.160 --> 00:33:40.400 align:center
- On Samay.
- So-- Hey, one second.
00:33:40.480 --> 00:33:42.640 align:center
- Drinks on Samay.
- One second. Hey!
00:33:47.440 --> 00:33:49.320 align:center
Bro, I'm sure we can afford it.
00:33:49.600 --> 00:33:51.800 align:center
Drinks on Samay.
Let's go!
00:33:53.560 --> 00:33:54.400 align:center
It's fine.
00:33:54.960 --> 00:33:55.840 align:center
Come on!
00:33:56.160 --> 00:33:58.520 align:center
So, let's-- But listen.
00:33:58.600 --> 00:34:00.920 align:center
One by one--
Let's go in a line.
00:34:01.040 --> 00:34:04.200 align:center
- From the back.
- Actually, yeah, start from the back.
00:34:04.640 --> 00:34:06.520 align:center
Exit one by one from the back.
00:34:06.760 --> 00:34:09.760 align:center
- One by one. Nice and easy.
- Exit one by one from the back.
00:34:09.920 --> 00:34:11.600 align:center
- Bro, drinks with Samay!
- We love you.
00:34:11.679 --> 00:34:13.800 align:center
I'll come. I'll join you guys.
00:34:15.800 --> 00:34:18.560 align:center
Fuck, this guy's asking for food too.
00:34:20.800 --> 00:34:23.199 align:center
Friends, while we wait for the lights
to come back on at Habitat,
00:34:23.280 --> 00:34:25.159 align:center
I'm here to tell you something important.
00:34:25.560 --> 00:34:28.480 align:center
If you're sitting at home watching Latent,
that's great.
00:34:28.560 --> 00:34:32.080 align:center
But the real fun of Latent
is watching it live, sitting in this room.
00:34:32.159 --> 00:34:33.440 align:center
Because anything can happen.
Sometimes the lights go out,
00:34:33.520 --> 00:34:36.000 align:center
sometimes we dance, sometimes we laugh,
and sometimes we cry.
00:34:36.080 --> 00:34:37.760 align:center
Well, that's something that happens
after the episode is released.
00:34:38.080 --> 00:34:41.120 align:center
But if you want to experience all of this
while sitting in this room,
00:34:41.199 --> 00:34:43.360 align:center
here's the QR code. You can scan it
00:34:43.440 --> 00:34:47.040 align:center
and be a part of all my live shows,
including my India tour, my world tour,
00:34:47.120 --> 00:34:48.080 align:center
and Latent Live.
00:34:48.239 --> 00:34:50.560 align:center
So, here's the QR code.
Scan your tickets--
00:34:50.639 --> 00:34:53.360 align:center
Scan this QR code
and get your tickets right now.
00:34:54.520 --> 00:34:57.400 align:center
And just like that, Karan Aujla
is doing the same show again.
00:35:01.440 --> 00:35:02.400 align:center
Amazing, man.
00:35:02.480 --> 00:35:04.320 align:center
Bring the naked guy back.
00:35:04.400 --> 00:35:05.760 align:center
Let's fucking do this.
00:35:05.840 --> 00:35:07.800 align:center
Deep Gopal, come back.
00:35:08.400 --> 00:35:09.440 align:center
He's here.
00:35:10.920 --> 00:35:12.280 align:center
Let's do this!
00:35:12.960 --> 00:35:15.320 align:center
How long did it take you
to build a body like that?
00:35:15.400 --> 00:35:17.560 align:center
I've been working out
for four years straight.
00:35:18.000 --> 00:35:19.560 align:center
And what do you do for protein?
00:35:21.720 --> 00:35:23.440 align:center
- I--
- You take MuscleBlaze, right?
00:35:24.320 --> 00:35:25.560 align:center
Avvatar…
00:35:25.680 --> 00:35:27.560 align:center
Have you tried
The Whole Truth protein bar?
00:35:27.640 --> 00:35:30.160 align:center
- Only Avvatar.
- SuperYou, right?
00:35:30.240 --> 00:35:31.480 align:center
The fuck, man?
00:35:31.960 --> 00:35:33.800 align:center
We finally scraped together
a sponsor, man.
00:35:34.280 --> 00:35:36.120 align:center
So, how do you like Avvatar Protein?
00:35:36.360 --> 00:35:38.680 align:center
I've tried it.
Top quality, for sure,
00:35:38.760 --> 00:35:40.520 align:center
but it's pricey.
00:35:41.080 --> 00:35:42.600 align:center
- How much does it cost?
- It's pricey.
00:35:42.680 --> 00:35:44.240 align:center
- It is.
- Bro, nothing is too expensive for you.
00:35:44.400 --> 00:35:45.760 align:center
No, no, but still.
00:35:46.720 --> 00:35:48.200 align:center
How much is it? 120 rupees.
00:35:48.960 --> 00:35:50.520 align:center
Then why did I get the 80-rupee one?
00:35:52.040 --> 00:35:53.240 align:center
Mine says 80.
00:35:53.320 --> 00:35:54.920 align:center
- Tetra pack.
- Oh, this one. Sorry, sorry.
00:35:55.920 --> 00:35:57.720 align:center
Bro, take out a drink too, please.
00:35:58.240 --> 00:36:00.360 align:center
He also just launched a drink
with Virat Kohli.
00:36:00.440 --> 00:36:03.200 align:center
Oh, let's go!
00:36:04.560 --> 00:36:06.360 align:center
I did a clothing line with Virat Kohli.
00:36:06.440 --> 00:36:07.360 align:center
I came up with this drink myself.
00:36:07.440 --> 00:36:10.640 align:center
- Oh, okay.
- Sometimes you call me Diljit, sometimes…
00:36:11.120 --> 00:36:12.120 align:center
Fucker!
00:36:12.760 --> 00:36:15.040 align:center
- Alright, alright. Bro!
- You started this, right?
00:36:15.120 --> 00:36:17.960 align:center
Look, all this is average.
00:36:18.400 --> 00:36:20.080 align:center
Right? This has zero sugar.
00:36:20.320 --> 00:36:22.560 align:center
If you want to take care of yourself,
cut sugar out of your life.
00:36:22.640 --> 00:36:24.520 align:center
And it has zero taste, too, by the way.
00:36:26.040 --> 00:36:27.280 align:center
So, speaking of zero,
00:36:27.720 --> 00:36:30.440 align:center
Rahul's going on a world tour soon.
00:36:32.760 --> 00:36:35.120 align:center
Maybe give your world tour
a shout-out, man.
00:36:35.200 --> 00:36:37.440 align:center
Yeah, yeah. It's not like
my passport got confiscated.
00:36:42.120 --> 00:36:45.480 align:center
No, no…
It's nothing like that.
00:36:46.000 --> 00:36:49.000 align:center
- For one hour of such good humor,
- Comeback!
00:36:49.080 --> 00:36:53.360 align:center
- go to Rahul Dua's show.
- Rahul Dua's show! Let's go!
00:36:55.320 --> 00:36:56.640 align:center
Rahul bhai, I love you, man.
00:36:59.360 --> 00:37:02.240 align:center
It says here,
"I had so many weird gay interactions."
00:37:02.320 --> 00:37:03.400 align:center
I love your lips.
00:37:05.720 --> 00:37:07.200 align:center
I keep getting them on Instagram.
00:37:07.280 --> 00:37:08.600 align:center
Lots of weird ones.
"I want you."
00:37:08.680 --> 00:37:10.040 align:center
"I want your ass." Stuff like that.
00:37:10.120 --> 00:37:11.440 align:center
- "I want your ass."
- Wow!
00:37:13.680 --> 00:37:16.320 align:center
- I get such DMs.
- Man, I messaged you in private.
00:37:16.400 --> 00:37:18.440 align:center
Why the fuck are you
telling everyone publicly?
00:37:19.040 --> 00:37:20.880 align:center
I only said that out of love.
00:37:22.240 --> 00:37:25.760 align:center
You wrote here that you're really
good at making bad and unfunny jokes.
00:37:25.840 --> 00:37:27.280 align:center
Why do you do this?
00:37:27.760 --> 00:37:29.000 align:center
Or does it just happen to you?
00:37:29.080 --> 00:37:30.280 align:center
- It happens, I mean,
- It happens.
00:37:30.360 --> 00:37:32.160 align:center
- it happens around close ones.
- Hear that, Samay?
00:37:32.680 --> 00:37:34.360 align:center
- It happens sometimes.
- Let's hear it, man.
00:37:34.440 --> 00:37:37.000 align:center
You're still hung up on what happened
before the power went out.
00:37:37.080 --> 00:37:39.040 align:center
- Tell us one of your unfunny jokes.
- Let's hear it.
00:37:39.120 --> 00:37:40.240 align:center
- Shoot.
- Should I?
00:37:40.320 --> 00:37:42.480 align:center
My friend and I were just talking. We
were just talking on a call, and he said,
00:37:42.560 --> 00:37:45.360 align:center
"I bought this for 5,000,
and that for 10,000."
00:37:45.560 --> 00:37:48.160 align:center
So I said, "Why buy all this, bro?"
"What's the point?"
00:37:48.240 --> 00:37:50.080 align:center
So he said, "I do it for the thrill, bro."
00:37:50.360 --> 00:37:52.200 align:center
Then I said,
"Then go touch a live wire."
00:37:53.720 --> 00:37:56.240 align:center
- It's bad, I know.
- Oh, my God.
00:37:57.120 --> 00:37:58.960 align:center
To heal from such jokes,
00:37:59.760 --> 00:38:01.440 align:center
- go to Rahul Dua's show.
- Rahul Dua…
00:38:01.520 --> 00:38:03.200 align:center
Let's go!
00:38:03.560 --> 00:38:05.840 align:center
- For much better comedy.
- For much, much better comedy.
00:38:05.920 --> 00:38:08.520 align:center
Wow, the power went out,
and my fortunes changed.
00:38:10.520 --> 00:38:11.360 align:center
I love you, Samay bhai.
00:38:11.440 --> 00:38:13.440 align:center
- I love you, Samay.
- I love you too. Come on, man!
00:38:13.640 --> 00:38:14.800 align:center
- Deep bhai, I have a question.
- Yes.
00:38:14.880 --> 00:38:15.720 align:center
You wrote here,
00:38:15.880 --> 00:38:20.000 align:center
"I'm currently on a no-fap streak
of over 100 days."
00:38:20.520 --> 00:38:22.040 align:center
Has it been 100 days?
00:38:22.240 --> 00:38:23.120 align:center
More than 100.
00:38:23.200 --> 00:38:25.400 align:center
Man, last time a guy did no-fap…
00:38:31.760 --> 00:38:34.080 align:center
Why are you doing this
100-day no-fap streak?
00:38:34.160 --> 00:38:36.720 align:center
I mean, I was kind of addicted to it.
00:38:37.280 --> 00:38:39.040 align:center
- Alright.
- So I had to make a change.
00:38:39.600 --> 00:38:41.400 align:center
Because it has protein too?
Is that why?
00:38:45.600 --> 00:38:48.720 align:center
- Karan paaji?
- I'm not saying anything about this.
00:38:50.240 --> 00:38:51.720 align:center
But do you do all this?
00:38:52.040 --> 00:38:53.280 align:center
Man, I…
00:38:53.360 --> 00:38:54.640 align:center
He doesn't need to.
00:38:55.200 --> 00:38:56.520 align:center
- He doesn't need to.
- What?
00:38:59.120 --> 00:39:01.080 align:center
I need it more than anyone.
00:39:01.720 --> 00:39:02.960 align:center
Come here, I'll help you out.
00:39:07.440 --> 00:39:08.720 align:center
I'm a married man, bro.
00:39:09.600 --> 00:39:10.440 align:center
I'm good.
00:39:10.520 --> 00:39:11.840 align:center
We'll just turn off the camera.
00:39:13.360 --> 00:39:14.680 align:center
So, it says here…
00:39:15.800 --> 00:39:17.960 align:center
What else does it say?
Tanmay bhai, you ask.
00:39:18.120 --> 00:39:20.240 align:center
- You're asking the right questions.
- Bro…
00:39:21.040 --> 00:39:22.000 align:center
Ask about the drug trafficking one.
00:39:22.080 --> 00:39:23.800 align:center
Drug-- Okay.
Should we ask him about drug trafficking?
00:39:23.960 --> 00:39:25.160 align:center
Yeah, that's definitely
making the final edit.
00:39:26.800 --> 00:39:28.160 align:center
Bro, which drug is your favorite?
00:39:28.240 --> 00:39:29.560 align:center
- Come on, man!
- Sorry, sorry.
00:39:29.640 --> 00:39:31.040 align:center
- Is that how you ask?
- Sorry, sorry.
00:39:31.120 --> 00:39:32.200 align:center
Let me show you how to ask.
00:39:32.280 --> 00:39:33.480 align:center
The Cyber Cell will be watching this.
00:39:33.720 --> 00:39:35.440 align:center
You wrote something really awful here.
00:39:41.880 --> 00:39:44.440 align:center
"If you could get away with one crime,
it would be drug trafficking."
00:39:44.520 --> 00:39:45.440 align:center
Seriously, man?
00:39:45.840 --> 00:39:48.560 align:center
I was inspired by Breaking Bad.
It sounded thrilling.
00:39:48.640 --> 00:39:49.600 align:center
It's not correct.
00:39:51.160 --> 00:39:52.560 align:center
- I mean--
- It's not right.
00:39:52.640 --> 00:39:54.320 align:center
I mean, what other crime is there?
00:39:54.520 --> 00:39:55.520 align:center
Drugs are bad.
00:39:55.600 --> 00:39:57.400 align:center
- Yes, yes, absolutely.
- Have you ever done them?
00:39:57.920 --> 00:39:59.680 align:center
Never.
Of course, never.
00:39:59.880 --> 00:40:01.520 align:center
Then why do you want to traffic drugs?
00:40:01.600 --> 00:40:04.360 align:center
What other crime could I write?
I couldn't write murder, of course.
00:40:04.440 --> 00:40:05.280 align:center
Really?
00:40:05.440 --> 00:40:08.320 align:center
- If you could legally murder one person…
- One murder.
00:40:08.400 --> 00:40:09.280 align:center
Ranveer Allahbadia.
00:40:09.360 --> 00:40:10.440 align:center
Oh, man!
00:40:13.920 --> 00:40:15.240 align:center
He had that one ready.
00:40:16.120 --> 00:40:17.680 align:center
No. Come on, man!
00:40:17.760 --> 00:40:19.560 align:center
He's actually thought about his death.
00:40:21.400 --> 00:40:22.880 align:center
Good one.
00:40:22.960 --> 00:40:24.920 align:center
He's a sweet guy, man.
Come on.
00:40:25.000 --> 00:40:27.000 align:center
He's the reason we got so many
sponsors this season.
00:40:27.720 --> 00:40:30.080 align:center
Shout-out to my man
Ranveer Allahbadia.
00:40:30.960 --> 00:40:31.920 align:center
Let's go!
00:40:32.000 --> 00:40:34.160 align:center
Still Alive at 65 million views.
00:40:36.280 --> 00:40:38.000 align:center
Incredible.
Did you see that, Tanmay?
00:40:38.200 --> 00:40:39.720 align:center
A comeback just one year
after the controversy.
00:40:41.160 --> 00:40:42.120 align:center
Learn something.
00:40:44.840 --> 00:40:46.680 align:center
Alright, time to score this guy,
00:40:46.760 --> 00:40:47.840 align:center
who I want to score.
00:40:49.200 --> 00:40:50.080 align:center
Later.
00:40:51.000 --> 00:40:53.840 align:center
Man, I want to give you a nine.
00:40:54.200 --> 00:40:56.800 align:center
This is my first time
scoring someone's naked body.
00:40:58.880 --> 00:41:00.960 align:center
- Take a nine.
- Thank you.
00:41:01.040 --> 00:41:02.320 align:center
Hey, why did you deduct one, Gurleen?
00:41:02.560 --> 00:41:03.600 align:center
I didn't want to see any nipples.
00:41:06.000 --> 00:41:08.200 align:center
An eight from me.
00:41:08.280 --> 00:41:10.800 align:center
- Why deduct two?
- I deducted one for each nipple.
00:41:11.160 --> 00:41:12.120 align:center
One for each nipple.
00:41:12.280 --> 00:41:14.760 align:center
- Paaji?
- I'll give a six.
00:41:14.880 --> 00:41:16.520 align:center
Why a six? Why deduct four, paaji?
00:41:16.600 --> 00:41:19.320 align:center
I didn't come here to see this.
00:41:20.600 --> 00:41:21.520 align:center
Come on, man.
00:41:21.640 --> 00:41:23.360 align:center
- Sorry, man.
- If everyone gave him a ten,
00:41:23.440 --> 00:41:25.040 align:center
his 100-day streak would end, bro.
00:41:25.880 --> 00:41:27.680 align:center
I really found you very attractive.
00:41:27.960 --> 00:41:30.800 align:center
- Thank you.
- I'll give you…
00:41:31.640 --> 00:41:33.000 align:center
What?
00:41:34.240 --> 00:41:36.440 align:center
Samay bhai, don't do this.
00:41:37.360 --> 00:41:38.320 align:center
That's it.
00:41:39.840 --> 00:41:41.120 align:center
Later, later. Definitely.
00:41:41.200 --> 00:41:42.920 align:center
I want to give you…
00:41:45.840 --> 00:41:47.560 align:center
That's pretty much it. I don't have…
00:41:49.080 --> 00:41:52.840 align:center
So, I'll give you… a ten, man.
00:41:53.440 --> 00:41:54.560 align:center
Let's go.
00:41:55.640 --> 00:41:58.720 align:center
So, that makes your average 8.5.
00:42:01.560 --> 00:42:02.720 align:center
He wrote a nine.
00:42:03.480 --> 00:42:06.320 align:center
- Nine! Shit, man.
- Nine! Oh, man!
00:42:07.080 --> 00:42:09.040 align:center
- Shit. Gurleen!
- That was so close,
00:42:09.160 --> 00:42:12.560 align:center
just like I was when I saw you naked.
00:42:13.600 --> 00:42:14.760 align:center
- That was so much fun, Deep Gopal.
- Thank you.
00:42:14.840 --> 00:42:16.400 align:center
Thank you so much.
I wish you had won, bro.
00:42:19.000 --> 00:42:20.000 align:center
Alright.
00:42:25.200 --> 00:42:28.040 align:center
Alright. Make some noise
for the next act, Gaurav Madan.
00:42:32.200 --> 00:42:34.200 align:center
He's gonna do some
stand-up comedy with the guitar.
00:42:36.200 --> 00:42:37.960 align:center
Guess they ran out of muscles
after the last guy.
00:42:45.680 --> 00:42:49.160 align:center
Friends, for such amazing comedy,
00:42:49.440 --> 00:42:51.680 align:center
- go to Rahul Dua's show, man.
- Rahul Dua's world tour!
00:42:53.680 --> 00:42:56.080 align:center
My man is touring across the world.
00:42:56.800 --> 00:42:58.840 align:center
- I love you, Rahul bhai.
- Love you too, brother.
00:43:05.080 --> 00:43:06.600 align:center
He's been jerking off daily
for 100 days straight.
00:43:11.240 --> 00:43:13.240 align:center
He's got his own streak going, paaji.
00:43:13.600 --> 00:43:15.440 align:center
No, I took one day off.
00:43:16.360 --> 00:43:18.080 align:center
Guys, let's have a round of applause
for Gaurav Madan.
00:43:18.160 --> 00:43:19.920 align:center
- Yeah, let's go.
- Let's go, let's go, let's go.
00:43:21.640 --> 00:43:24.360 align:center
I've been hitting the gym regularly
for six years.
00:43:25.640 --> 00:43:27.080 align:center
That wasn't a joke, man.
00:43:28.120 --> 00:43:29.480 align:center
I actually do go to the gym.
00:43:29.640 --> 00:43:31.760 align:center
And recently, I heard a song at my gym.
00:43:31.840 --> 00:43:32.920 align:center
The lyrics were,
00:43:33.240 --> 00:43:37.000 align:center
"28-inch waist, 47-kilo beauty." Right?
00:43:37.520 --> 00:43:39.280 align:center
Basically, it means
00:43:39.360 --> 00:43:40.960 align:center
the girl's waist is 28 inches,
00:43:41.040 --> 00:43:43.160 align:center
and she weighs 47 kilos.
Right?
00:43:43.600 --> 00:43:47.240 align:center
Listening to this song,
I realized those are my measurements too.
00:43:53.760 --> 00:43:55.680 align:center
I have the perfect body
00:43:56.160 --> 00:43:57.680 align:center
for a Punjabi supermodel.
00:44:01.080 --> 00:44:03.280 align:center
I wrote a song about going to the gym.
00:44:03.960 --> 00:44:07.480 align:center
Have you guys heard that song
"Khamoshiyan" by Arijit Singh ji?
00:44:08.440 --> 00:44:09.880 align:center
After today, you won't be able to.
00:44:10.720 --> 00:44:11.640 align:center
Sorry.
00:44:12.160 --> 00:44:13.040 align:center
It goes like…
00:44:17.560 --> 00:44:21.520 align:center
I hit leg day yesterday
00:44:21.760 --> 00:44:25.000 align:center
Now I can barely stand
00:44:25.920 --> 00:44:29.760 align:center
My trainer's such a monster
00:44:30.080 --> 00:44:33.240 align:center
I'll choke him with these hands
00:44:34.440 --> 00:44:38.600 align:center
Every part of me
00:44:38.720 --> 00:44:42.120 align:center
Is crying out for rest
00:44:43.880 --> 00:44:47.840 align:center
Weaknesses!
00:44:52.280 --> 00:44:56.160 align:center
Weaknesses!
00:44:56.360 --> 00:45:00.280 align:center
Weakness in my legs
00:45:00.360 --> 00:45:04.120 align:center
Weakness!
00:45:08.280 --> 00:45:14.200 align:center
Weakness in my thighs
00:45:17.440 --> 00:45:22.720 align:center
Did your sweatpants get caught up
In one of those machines?
00:45:25.240 --> 00:45:30.400 align:center
Did you have to lie face down
And hook your feet in?
00:45:33.240 --> 00:45:38.640 align:center
I went to grab some water
Someone stole my dumbbell too
00:45:41.160 --> 00:45:46.400 align:center
Where do I even start
With what I've been through?
00:45:49.000 --> 00:45:52.680 align:center
I even took magnesium
00:45:53.200 --> 00:45:56.040 align:center
And Omega-3 each day
00:46:04.920 --> 00:46:08.680 align:center
I used to be vegetarian
00:46:09.040 --> 00:46:12.240 align:center
Now I'm boiling eggs away
00:46:13.320 --> 00:46:16.960 align:center
I still couldn't hit my protein goal
00:46:17.040 --> 00:46:20.640 align:center
But my digestion's gone to hell!
00:46:26.000 --> 00:46:29.720 align:center
Weaknesses!
00:46:30.000 --> 00:46:33.880 align:center
Weakness in my legs
00:46:33.960 --> 00:46:37.600 align:center
Weaknesses!
00:46:37.800 --> 00:46:43.720 align:center
Weakness in my thighs
00:46:44.120 --> 00:46:45.040 align:center
Thank you, guys.
00:46:50.880 --> 00:46:52.040 align:center
Come on, Rahul Dua!
00:46:52.120 --> 00:46:53.880 align:center
Pop it, pop it, pop it!
Hurry up!
00:46:55.960 --> 00:46:56.920 align:center
Nice.
00:46:57.120 --> 00:46:58.480 align:center
Oh, my God, bro!
00:46:58.560 --> 00:46:59.800 align:center
- Let's hear it for him!
- Let's go!
00:46:59.880 --> 00:47:00.880 align:center
Let's go!
00:47:00.960 --> 00:47:02.760 align:center
That was really amazing, man!
00:47:03.760 --> 00:47:05.040 align:center
Oh fuck, bro.
00:47:05.720 --> 00:47:07.120 align:center
- What a rockstar, man!
- That was hilarious.
00:47:07.200 --> 00:47:08.760 align:center
Man, he wrote that from the heart. Fuck.
00:47:10.280 --> 00:47:11.560 align:center
It's not like he could write it
with his thighs.
00:47:15.680 --> 00:47:16.720 align:center
How long have you been doing this?
00:47:17.280 --> 00:47:20.680 align:center
I wrote this song about six months ago.
00:47:21.000 --> 00:47:22.800 align:center
I've been doing stand-up
for around six years.
00:47:23.160 --> 00:47:24.040 align:center
Amazing, man.
00:47:24.120 --> 00:47:26.280 align:center
It says here you did
a 100-day challenge.
00:47:26.960 --> 00:47:29.120 align:center
The 100-day, 100-push-up challenge.
00:47:29.680 --> 00:47:31.920 align:center
I did one push-up every day.
00:47:37.280 --> 00:47:39.400 align:center
But, Gaurav bhai,
do you want to gain weight?
00:47:39.760 --> 00:47:40.800 align:center
Of course, yes.
00:47:40.880 --> 00:47:42.560 align:center
So, maybe you can give him some advice.
00:47:42.720 --> 00:47:44.480 align:center
No, I just want to ask Tanmay bhai,
00:47:44.560 --> 00:47:46.360 align:center
is all the fat you lost
00:47:46.880 --> 00:47:47.880 align:center
stored somewhere?
00:47:56.200 --> 00:47:58.840 align:center
- That was a good one.
- What's your weight?
00:47:58.920 --> 00:48:00.840 align:center
It's stored in Kullu's mouth.
00:48:05.000 --> 00:48:06.000 align:center
Your opinion is that
00:48:06.080 --> 00:48:08.360 align:center
we should remove mirrors
from changing rooms.
00:48:09.440 --> 00:48:10.360 align:center
Yeah, I mean…
00:48:11.120 --> 00:48:14.440 align:center
Say I go into a changing room
to try on clothes, right?
00:48:15.160 --> 00:48:16.560 align:center
So sometimes…
00:48:16.760 --> 00:48:19.800 align:center
I just don't want to see
myself completely naked.
00:48:20.640 --> 00:48:21.560 align:center
- Oh, no.
- Right?
00:48:21.680 --> 00:48:23.480 align:center
I recently went to one,
00:48:23.560 --> 00:48:26.200 align:center
- and I saw myself completely naked.
- That's okay, bro.
00:48:27.080 --> 00:48:28.520 align:center
I went there to buy shoes.
00:48:38.000 --> 00:48:40.480 align:center
Then why did you get completely naked?
00:48:41.160 --> 00:48:43.200 align:center
- That was the joke, get it?
- Man…
00:48:47.720 --> 00:48:49.400 align:center
Rahul Dua is getting his revenge.
00:48:50.360 --> 00:48:51.400 align:center
Damn, bro!
00:48:52.320 --> 00:48:54.760 align:center
It says here that if you could
travel back in time,
00:48:55.160 --> 00:48:56.880 align:center
you'd practice removing a bra.
00:48:58.520 --> 00:48:59.960 align:center
So, do you have a girlfriend?
00:49:00.400 --> 00:49:01.440 align:center
No, not right now.
00:49:01.760 --> 00:49:02.600 align:center
I see.
00:49:02.680 --> 00:49:04.040 align:center
- Did you have one before?
- Yes.
00:49:04.760 --> 00:49:07.280 align:center
Obviously you guys must have--
Actually--
00:49:07.360 --> 00:49:08.480 align:center
Go for it, go for it.
00:49:10.120 --> 00:49:10.960 align:center
- Go for it.
- There's something
00:49:11.040 --> 00:49:12.320 align:center
about this fucking chair!
00:49:13.520 --> 00:49:15.200 align:center
Seriously, there's something in here.
00:49:15.280 --> 00:49:18.000 align:center
They're also bringing chicken and whatnot…
00:49:18.520 --> 00:49:21.080 align:center
Paaji, you should ask
if he's ever set the mood.
00:49:21.240 --> 00:49:22.320 align:center
- Ask it like that.
- Yeah.
00:49:23.160 --> 00:49:24.600 align:center
I mean, obviously, you guys were a couple.
00:49:24.680 --> 00:49:26.520 align:center
How serious was your relationship?
00:49:26.760 --> 00:49:28.200 align:center
Like, six or seven months.
00:49:28.560 --> 00:49:30.280 align:center
- That's it.
- That's decent.
00:49:30.360 --> 00:49:33.120 align:center
How was the experience?
I mean, did you guys have any--
00:49:33.360 --> 00:49:34.520 align:center
Fuck, I'm going there again!
00:49:34.600 --> 00:49:35.840 align:center
For fuck's sake!
00:49:39.480 --> 00:49:41.200 align:center
- No, bro.
- Hanky-panky is a safe word.
00:49:41.280 --> 00:49:42.760 align:center
Fuck, there's something here!
00:49:42.840 --> 00:49:44.600 align:center
No, that was just my finger, man.
00:49:48.840 --> 00:49:50.320 align:center
- Bro--
- You can put the guitar down
00:49:50.400 --> 00:49:51.720 align:center
if it's too heavy.
00:49:56.200 --> 00:49:57.920 align:center
Just watching you is wearing Gurleen out.
00:49:58.760 --> 00:50:00.040 align:center
Gaurav bhai, you said here that
00:50:00.120 --> 00:50:01.800 align:center
if you could switch lives
with someone for a day,
00:50:01.880 --> 00:50:03.640 align:center
it'd be Hrithik Roshan
from Koi… Mil Gaya.
00:50:04.320 --> 00:50:07.280 align:center
Yeah, actually, a lot of people tell me
00:50:07.680 --> 00:50:09.560 align:center
- my voice sounds a bit like Hrithik's.
- Yes.
00:50:09.640 --> 00:50:11.160 align:center
- Yes!
- But they say
00:50:11.240 --> 00:50:13.520 align:center
I sound like Hrithik from the first half.
00:50:14.920 --> 00:50:16.160 align:center
That's what I sound like.
00:50:17.000 --> 00:50:18.360 align:center
So, I want the second half…
00:50:18.640 --> 00:50:20.000 align:center
Try saying "Bournvita."
00:50:20.720 --> 00:50:21.600 align:center
Bournvita.
00:50:28.760 --> 00:50:30.840 align:center
- What a fucking guy, man!
- Gaurav, you're sick, bro!
00:50:31.320 --> 00:50:32.200 align:center
Like, actually.
00:50:42.000 --> 00:50:44.360 align:center
Alright, it's time to score Gaurav Madan.
00:50:44.440 --> 00:50:47.120 align:center
You're fucking incredible, man!
I give you a ten out of ten, brother.
00:50:47.200 --> 00:50:48.360 align:center
Ten out of ten.
00:50:48.440 --> 00:50:50.320 align:center
Same here, man.
Ten out of ten for this guy.
00:50:51.440 --> 00:50:53.080 align:center
- Ten.
- Ten from Tanmay.
00:50:54.520 --> 00:50:56.400 align:center
Gurleen? Ten.
00:50:58.000 --> 00:51:00.000 align:center
- Ten.
- Oh, no!
00:51:01.560 --> 00:51:03.680 align:center
That makes your average ten.
00:51:06.800 --> 00:51:07.720 align:center
Come on, man!
00:51:22.640 --> 00:51:25.080 align:center
Let's fucking go!
00:51:27.880 --> 00:51:29.320 align:center
What a guy, man!
00:51:29.400 --> 00:51:32.000 align:center
I love you, man!
I just wanna hug you. Come on.
00:51:32.800 --> 00:51:33.800 align:center
Thank you.
00:51:36.080 --> 00:51:36.920 align:center
You're incredible.
00:51:37.000 --> 00:51:38.440 align:center
Wow, you're so funny!
00:51:38.520 --> 00:51:42.720 align:center
You win all the ticket sales.
That's 100,000 rupees, bro.
00:51:44.720 --> 00:51:46.080 align:center
Take some medicine now, okay?
00:51:48.280 --> 00:51:50.600 align:center
You know what, man?
You know what's missing in your life?
00:51:50.680 --> 00:51:51.880 align:center
Some good protein.
00:51:52.840 --> 00:51:54.400 align:center
- That is true.
- So, I give you--
00:51:54.480 --> 00:51:57.160 align:center
Only for today, I'm making an exception.
00:51:57.320 --> 00:51:59.480 align:center
I usually give people one protein bar,
00:51:59.720 --> 00:52:01.320 align:center
one milkshake.
00:52:01.640 --> 00:52:03.200 align:center
I'm giving you, from Avvatar,
00:52:04.000 --> 00:52:07.040 align:center
five lakh rupees worth of protein, bro.
00:52:07.520 --> 00:52:08.480 align:center
There you go.
00:52:10.120 --> 00:52:11.920 align:center
- Holy shit!
- There you go, brother.
00:52:12.000 --> 00:52:14.320 align:center
Five lakh worth of protein for you!
00:52:14.960 --> 00:52:15.880 align:center
Nice one.
00:52:15.960 --> 00:52:17.080 align:center
There you go.
00:52:18.120 --> 00:52:20.680 align:center
So what are you going to do
with five lakh worth of protein?
00:52:21.240 --> 00:52:22.640 align:center
Completely fuck up my digestion.
00:52:28.800 --> 00:52:29.680 align:center
There you go, brother.
00:52:29.760 --> 00:52:32.440 align:center
Thank you so much for coming
and bringing your talent to our show.
00:52:32.520 --> 00:52:33.880 align:center
A huge round of applause for this guy!
00:52:34.280 --> 00:52:36.000 align:center
Thank you.
Thank you so much.
00:52:36.080 --> 00:52:38.720 align:center
And that was India's Got Latent.
00:52:41.040 --> 00:52:42.080 align:center
Thank you so much for coming.
00:52:42.160 --> 00:52:44.200 align:center
Karan bhai, honestly, tell me.
How was your experience?
00:52:44.280 --> 00:52:46.160 align:center
Bro, I felt like I was at home.
00:52:46.280 --> 00:52:49.360 align:center
And I think I got
a little too comfortable.
00:52:51.720 --> 00:52:54.080 align:center
I don't know whether coming here
was the right or wrong decision,
00:52:54.160 --> 00:52:55.680 align:center
but I had a blast.
00:52:55.800 --> 00:52:57.720 align:center
- My man!
- I loved it.
00:52:58.200 --> 00:53:00.640 align:center
Karan bhai, if you really felt at home,
00:53:00.720 --> 00:53:02.880 align:center
then the next time this venue
gets wrecked, chip in for the repairs.
00:53:03.960 --> 00:53:04.960 align:center
Help rebuild it.
00:53:05.480 --> 00:53:08.080 align:center
On that note, folks, Rahul Dua is on tour,
00:53:08.440 --> 00:53:10.960 align:center
and so am I.
Come catch one of our shows.
00:53:11.040 --> 00:53:12.240 align:center
Gurleen's on tour too.
00:53:12.320 --> 00:53:13.920 align:center
Everyone's on tour except Tanmay.
00:53:14.000 --> 00:53:14.960 align:center
What the fuck!
00:53:15.120 --> 00:53:16.760 align:center
- Tanmay--
- I'm working on my special.
00:53:16.840 --> 00:53:18.360 align:center
Tanmay will be at his computer doing this…
00:53:23.040 --> 00:53:25.480 align:center
You bastard, you make that sound too,
just at the Cyber Cell.