WEBVTT
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Alright.
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Welcome to India's Got Latent,
presented by Ai+ Nova smartphone.
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Delivery partner, Flipkart Minutes.
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- Yuck!
- Why "yuck"?
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That's just how it fucking is, man.
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I've got last year's legal fees
to pay somehow.
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What else-- There are a few more things.
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Man, help me out here.
I can't remember them all.
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Okay.
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Quick delivery partner,
Flipkart Minutes.
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Protein partner, Avvatar Protein.
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And fragrance partner, Wild Stone.
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Amazing.
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And now, are we ready to start the show?
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We have a banger panel for you.
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Make some noise for the OGs.
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Kiku Sharda.
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Harssh Limbachiyaa.
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Chandan Prabhakar.
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And Balraj Ghai.
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Let's go!
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Welcome, everyone. We've got
family-friendly comedians today.
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Family-friendly comedians.
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Except for Balraj.
He doesn't stay with his family.
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This is incredible.
Kiku Sharda on our show, man.
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I can't believe it.
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Man, it's like--
It's a dream come true, bhai.
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I mean it, genuinely. Of course.
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- But you disappointed me a little.
- Why?
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I didn't invite
a single woman to the panel,
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thinking you'd show up in a sari.
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But you didn't show up in a sari!
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Just order two oranges.
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They'll be here in no time.
From Flipkart Minutes!
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In that case, just order two melons.
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Do you ever accidentally
walk into the ladies' washroom?
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No, man. That's just nonsense.
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- That never happens.
- It's a habit, right?
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Have you ever come onstage
to do stand-up, folded your hands,
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and pleaded,
"Your Honor, please forgive me…"?
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If only you'd said that in a sari…
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I love you so much, man!
Thank you so much for coming.
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And don't worry, the food's coming too.
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And of course, Chandan bhai is here.
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- Chandan bhai, I love you so much, man.
- Thank you so much. Thank you.
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He's the OG of comedy.
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If you've seen The Kapil Sharma Show,
he plays the role of a tea seller.
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And… he's a very talented guy.
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In fact, someone once told me
that on The Kapil Sharma Show,
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he's even funnier than
Kapil Sharma himself.
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Yeah. He's the one who told me that.
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Man, you said you'd be respectful
and treat me with some dignity.
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Is this why you called me here?
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That's his trick to get you here.
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He told me the panel
was going to be amazing.
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No, Chandan bhai, I love you so much.
I'm a huge fan of yours.
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- I've been watching you since I was a kid.
- Thank you so much.
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So, can you bring us some tea?
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Sure, no problem.
I'll get you some tea.
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- Sir, you're not offended, are you?
- No, not at all.
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Then go get us some tea. Quick.
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I watched your show, Maa Hai Na.
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Yes, that's my latest show.
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That's Harssh bhai's answer
every time his kid asks for money.
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Hey, man…
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He was laughing his guts out at me.
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Paaji, do you know Balraj?
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Nice to meet you.
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- Balraj already said, "Nice to meet you."
- Who doesn't know Balraj?
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- Who's Balraj?
- He's my Chandan.
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I love you so much.
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- Is this why you called me here?
- No, sorry…
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You know, I thought being seated
in the center meant I had more value.
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Now I can't even get out from either side.
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We also have Harssh Limbachiyaa.
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You know, it's so good to have you.
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- You're such a fantastic writer, man.
- Same here.
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Harssh bhai has written
a lot of the OG comedy shows.
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- Which shows have you written?
- Comedy Circus,
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Comedy Nights Bachao, and many more.
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Many more. He has also worked
with Chandan sir and Kiku sir.
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In fact, he enjoyed seeing Kiku ji
in a sari so much
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that he ended up marrying Bharti.
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If you liked it that much,
you could've asked me out.
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Also, Balraj is here.
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Something his kids never get to say.
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Bhai, is it true
you don't spend time with your kids?
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I mean, I should be giving them more time.
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- Fuck! So that means he doesn't.
- Let's put it that way.
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No, not at all!
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He's always on tour with me.
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We call him a gentleman.
His kids ask, "Who's this man?"
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You've got this many sponsors?
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- Yes…
- This place gets torn down so often,
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I thought your only sponsors were
cement and rebar…
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Kiku bhai…
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You should do that
with your kids sometime.
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Also, friends, we've decided
to do something different this season.
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Every episode,
if you're watching from home,
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you can donate to the charity of the day.
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Today it's YODA,
Youth Organization in Defense of Animals.
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They do a lot of work for animals,
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including sterilization, vaccination,
and free medical care.
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Donate to them.
The link is in the description,
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and there's also a QR code here.
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- So, yeah--
- He just ate chicken tikka.
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If I could get some tea with that…
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But donate to YODA, man.
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They help all animals, except chickens.
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Alright, are we ready to start the show?
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Make some noise for the first act…
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Aditya Kodmur!
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- Kiku bhai…
- Are we supposed to lie on that?
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Sit on it.
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What, is he a vegetable seller?
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Okay, your 90 seconds are up.
Thank you so much.
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Okay.
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- Oh, man…
- The guy in the back freaked out.
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Yeah.
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I just hope the cameraman
doesn't get his throat cut.
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This is what Chandan bhai does
at Kapil's house.
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- Knocked the banana off.
- Yes!
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- Oh!
- Hey!
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Not bad.
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Nice!
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How did you like it?
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- Well--
- That hit really hard.
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- Dude, that was just… unnecessary.
- Very--
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Why did you learn this?
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So I wouldn't need knives.
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So if you cook okra at home,
do you cut it like this?
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No, the okra…
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They call me to chop the vegetables.
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Man, you'd go through three decks.
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- Yes.
- Three…
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And how does this work
for self-defense?
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These playing cards are so dangerous
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that they can slice through skin and
even break bones when I throw them.
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And what if the other guy shoots you?
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But you can break human bones?
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- Bones?!
- Yes.
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- Break bones? For real?
- Even human bones.
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Have you ever done it?
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I tried it once.
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- With a dog's bone.
- Did it work?
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A dog's-- What the fuck?
We're supporting an animal charity.
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No, it was just the bone.
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We're raising money, too.
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It was just a bone, not a dog, right?
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No, I'm kidding.
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Is this supposed to be funny?
Are animals something to joke about?
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Exactly.
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Animals have feelings too, man!
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- Yeah, of course.
- Bring me a chicken tikka.
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You just ripped off his joke
right in front of him.
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What kind of fucking writer are you?
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So now you know
that you can't just be a good writer.
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You have to be a good actor too.
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Bro, on that note, could I get some tea?
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He really loves me.
He's just kidding.
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Sir, I'd like to try something
with you too.
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I throw playing cards so fast
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that I can even light a match with one.
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- I…
- Go on.
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Let's have a big round of applause
for Samay Raina!
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Dude, look, I still have
eight more episodes to shoot.
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- What do I do?
- Please stand here.
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Okay.
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Dude, your first three shots
didn't even land right.
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I missed those on purpose.
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Oh!
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Okay, he'll light that match…
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You know, I fled Kashmir
to get away from all this.
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They tried to chop
my banana off there, too.
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That's too close, man!
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Dude, come here.
Back up a little.
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Leave some thrill in it.
Just back up a bit.
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Come on, man.
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I'm getting a little nervous.
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- Folks, this is gonna take a while.
- Four!
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- Just light it directly.
- Five!
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Dude, let's just light it that way.
00:10:11.760 --> 00:10:12.880 align:center
Don't move.
00:10:13.040 --> 00:10:14.279 align:center
Don't move, Samay.
00:10:14.280 --> 00:10:16.560 align:center
- It's your fault.
- Don't move? Are you giving him a shot?
00:10:16.680 --> 00:10:18.600 align:center
- "Don't move."
- Six!
00:10:19.920 --> 00:10:22.040 align:center
- Seven!
- Hey, that almost hit me!
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Angle it a bit.
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Samay, why are you messing it up?
00:10:26.520 --> 00:10:28.519 align:center
Did I reject you
in the last episode or what?
00:10:28.520 --> 00:10:30.160 align:center
- Eight!
- It broke.
00:10:31.360 --> 00:10:32.400 align:center
No, no, it broke.
00:10:33.200 --> 00:10:35.080 align:center
He's got 52 more tries.
00:10:35.280 --> 00:10:38.400 align:center
Buddy, the match is smaller now.
This is even harder.
00:10:40.560 --> 00:10:41.839 align:center
- Just get a new match.
- Yeah, mic--
00:10:41.840 --> 00:10:43.000 align:center
- Mic…
- Give him the mic.
00:10:43.320 --> 00:10:45.440 align:center
- Does anyone have a lighter?
- Guys, actually…
00:10:46.240 --> 00:10:49.879 align:center
I'm so sorry. I usually get it on
the first try. I'm just a little nervous.
00:10:49.880 --> 00:10:51.880 align:center
That's why, as you can see,
my hand's shaking a little.
00:10:52.080 --> 00:10:54.679 align:center
That's why I can't do it.
I usually get it right on the first try.
00:10:54.680 --> 00:10:55.799 align:center
- So sorry.
- A round of applause for him, guys.
00:10:55.800 --> 00:10:58.679 align:center
- Come on.
- Yes. Please, don't worry at all.
00:10:58.680 --> 00:10:59.520 align:center
Okay.
00:10:59.760 --> 00:11:02.280 align:center
- My hand's shaking.
- Your fucking hands are shaking?
00:11:04.120 --> 00:11:05.720 align:center
Have you even thought about mine?
00:11:06.760 --> 00:11:08.000 align:center
Samay, it's his first time.
00:11:08.440 --> 00:11:11.200 align:center
- Samay's hand is shaking and…
- Your hands are shaking, man!
00:11:13.320 --> 00:11:14.280 align:center
You'll be fine.
00:11:15.480 --> 00:11:16.880 align:center
Just catch fire already!
00:11:24.560 --> 00:11:25.840 align:center
Wow!
00:11:27.040 --> 00:11:29.320 align:center
- Incredible!
- That's amazing, man!
00:11:30.600 --> 00:11:31.559 align:center
Incredible, man!
00:11:31.560 --> 00:11:32.480 align:center
Dude…
00:11:34.920 --> 00:11:37.760 align:center
You finally did it on the 38th try.
00:11:38.120 --> 00:11:39.119 align:center
Crazy!
00:11:39.120 --> 00:11:42.200 align:center
Bro, that was wild!
How did you do that?
00:11:43.200 --> 00:11:47.119 align:center
Actually, I was a little nervous,
so I couldn't do it that accurately.
00:11:47.120 --> 00:11:49.800 align:center
I mean, this is my first time
around such big celebrities.
00:11:50.600 --> 00:11:51.520 align:center
Thank you.
00:11:53.840 --> 00:11:55.559 align:center
- No… I'm included too.
- On the other shows--
00:11:55.560 --> 00:11:57.360 align:center
I got it on the first try
on the other shows.
00:11:57.520 --> 00:11:59.520 align:center
Bro, do you have another match?
00:11:59.720 --> 00:12:01.759 align:center
- Yeah, of course.
- I would love to try.
00:12:01.760 --> 00:12:02.640 align:center
Yes, sure.
00:12:10.760 --> 00:12:13.240 align:center
You're tossing them around like
you're making it rain on a dancer.
00:12:19.000 --> 00:12:21.440 align:center
- Let's hear it for him. What a guy!
- Thank you so much.
00:12:22.680 --> 00:12:23.920 align:center
- Well done.
- Yes. Thank you.
00:12:24.720 --> 00:12:25.840 align:center
Each of you, take a card.
00:12:26.120 --> 00:12:27.879 align:center
- Samay, take one card.
- Okay.
00:12:27.880 --> 00:12:30.199 align:center
- I want you to use all the power you have…
- Yes.
00:12:30.200 --> 00:12:34.280 align:center
Put all your strength into it,
and throw a card. That's it.
00:12:34.880 --> 00:12:36.800 align:center
- Oh, man, in that case…
- Show me.
00:12:37.960 --> 00:12:39.320 align:center
- Use all the power you have.
- Come on.
00:12:44.360 --> 00:12:46.240 align:center
- You just had a protein bar.
- It's alright. Just try.
00:12:52.160 --> 00:12:53.000 align:center
So, now what?
00:12:53.400 --> 00:12:54.359 align:center
Finish.
00:12:54.360 --> 00:12:56.079 align:center
- So, you just--
- He just wanted us to show our strength.
00:12:56.080 --> 00:12:57.679 align:center
- Fucker!
- He was just showing us
00:12:57.680 --> 00:12:59.159 align:center
what a bunch of wusses we are!
00:12:59.160 --> 00:13:00.680 align:center
Now you try telling a joke!
00:13:02.800 --> 00:13:04.120 align:center
Just throw a card…
00:13:06.640 --> 00:13:08.680 align:center
Look, I threw it, and it came right back.
00:13:12.040 --> 00:13:13.080 align:center
When did you start doing this?
00:13:13.280 --> 00:13:14.640 align:center
About five years ago.
00:13:15.480 --> 00:13:17.280 align:center
- During the lockdown?
- Yes, during the lockdown.
00:13:18.040 --> 00:13:20.839 align:center
That's how I earned
six Guinness World Records.
00:13:20.840 --> 00:13:21.759 align:center
- You did?
- Really?
00:13:21.760 --> 00:13:23.000 align:center
- Yeah.
- Wow!
00:13:23.160 --> 00:13:26.160 align:center
The most cards used to light a match.
00:13:30.840 --> 00:13:32.279 align:center
But that was crazy, man.
00:13:32.280 --> 00:13:33.319 align:center
- Yes.
- How did that even catch fire?
00:13:33.320 --> 00:13:34.799 align:center
It doesn't even have that stuff in it.
Tobacco?
00:13:34.800 --> 00:13:36.160 align:center
- No, what's it called?
- No, actually…
00:13:37.000 --> 00:13:38.119 align:center
What do you call it?
00:13:38.120 --> 00:13:39.479 align:center
- On the match…
- The chemical.
00:13:39.480 --> 00:13:40.520 align:center
- The ammo.
- The chemical?
00:13:40.960 --> 00:13:43.080 align:center
- Gunpowder!
- Gunpowder!
00:13:43.400 --> 00:13:47.600 align:center
With so many celebrities watching me,
I couldn't get it on the first try. So…
00:13:48.640 --> 00:13:50.719 align:center
Are you being sarcastic
when you call us celebrities?
00:13:50.720 --> 00:13:51.880 align:center
- No worries.
- No.
00:13:52.240 --> 00:13:55.159 align:center
- No, you guys are celebrities. Come on.
- Thank you.
00:13:55.160 --> 00:13:57.560 align:center
And celebrities deserve
some tea, Chandu bhai.
00:13:59.800 --> 00:14:02.120 align:center
He loves me a lot.
He's always joking around.
00:14:03.120 --> 00:14:05.280 align:center
- Don't mind him.
- Okay.
00:14:05.560 --> 00:14:09.320 align:center
If you had the chance to switch lives
with anyone, you'd choose Virat Kohli.
00:14:11.120 --> 00:14:12.320 align:center
Why would you do that to him?
00:14:12.720 --> 00:14:13.720 align:center
Just…
00:14:14.800 --> 00:14:17.320 align:center
Maybe I'd land more hits.
00:14:17.920 --> 00:14:18.839 align:center
What?
00:14:18.840 --> 00:14:20.479 align:center
And Virat Kohli would be
the one throwing cards.
00:14:20.480 --> 00:14:21.440 align:center
Yes.
00:14:21.920 --> 00:14:23.160 align:center
I can throw a ball too.
00:14:24.440 --> 00:14:26.120 align:center
I can probably throw a ball even faster.
00:14:26.400 --> 00:14:27.720 align:center
Do you throw anything else?
00:14:28.720 --> 00:14:29.600 align:center
Give me anything.
00:14:32.080 --> 00:14:34.039 align:center
This is Avvatar protein bar.
00:14:34.040 --> 00:14:35.720 align:center
Their packaging is very strong.
00:14:36.000 --> 00:14:38.400 align:center
I challenge you to tear this open
with a single card.
00:14:39.040 --> 00:14:41.759 align:center
I can cut through metal cans with a card.
00:14:41.760 --> 00:14:45.279 align:center
Plastic usually absorbs
the impact of the card.
00:14:45.280 --> 00:14:46.559 align:center
So, it usually doesn't break.
00:14:46.560 --> 00:14:47.760 align:center
The Avvatar protein shake?
00:14:47.880 --> 00:14:49.120 align:center
Metal cans.
00:14:49.480 --> 00:14:50.519 align:center
- Fuck…
- Metal cans?
00:14:50.520 --> 00:14:52.520 align:center
Here you go, man. Break this.
The Ai+ phone.
00:14:52.720 --> 00:14:54.439 align:center
- Should I break it?
- Go ahead.
00:14:54.440 --> 00:14:57.240 align:center
- I'm not responsible if anything happens.
- Nope, neither are we.
00:14:59.120 --> 00:15:01.360 align:center
That's covered in the contract we signed.
00:15:02.720 --> 00:15:06.160 align:center
Let's see.
Ai+ phone versus Fruit Ninja.
00:15:11.280 --> 00:15:12.960 align:center
Amazing, man! Oh, shit!
00:15:14.640 --> 00:15:15.719 align:center
- Did it break?
- The phone just fell.
00:15:15.720 --> 00:15:18.320 align:center
- It fell. It can't break…
- Ai+ phone still lives.
00:15:19.600 --> 00:15:21.280 align:center
- The card ripped.
- The card ripped!
00:15:24.160 --> 00:15:26.400 align:center
Integration!
00:15:26.640 --> 00:15:28.600 align:center
That's Ai+ phone for you, folks!
00:15:30.680 --> 00:15:32.520 align:center
- That's some durability test.
- This phone is amazing.
00:15:35.800 --> 00:15:36.719 align:center
Excellent.
00:15:36.720 --> 00:15:38.200 align:center
- A round of applause for Aditya Kodmur!
- Amazing.
00:15:40.880 --> 00:15:41.760 align:center
Thank you.
00:15:41.880 --> 00:15:43.120 align:center
Time to score you.
00:15:43.440 --> 00:15:45.480 align:center
I'm giving you an eight, buddy.
00:15:46.200 --> 00:15:49.080 align:center
So, brother, I'm giving you a nine.
00:15:50.160 --> 00:15:51.080 align:center
Thank you.
00:15:52.640 --> 00:15:53.960 align:center
For that, you get an 8.5.
00:15:54.280 --> 00:15:55.680 align:center
- Wow! Incredible!
- Thank you.
00:15:56.440 --> 00:15:58.160 align:center
I'll give you a nine.
00:15:59.640 --> 00:16:00.879 align:center
Brother, you're incredible.
00:16:00.880 --> 00:16:01.919 align:center
- Please keep doing this.
- Thank you.
00:16:01.920 --> 00:16:03.199 align:center
But please don't hurt anyone.
00:16:03.200 --> 00:16:04.440 align:center
- Yeah, yeah, I don't.
- Wow.
00:16:05.000 --> 00:16:07.959 align:center
It's a-- I'm very scared, genuinely.
00:16:07.960 --> 00:16:10.759 align:center
That's why I'm deducting points.
Seven out of ten.
00:16:10.760 --> 00:16:11.679 align:center
- Okay.
- Yes.
00:16:11.680 --> 00:16:13.280 align:center
A seven from Abhinav Bindra.
00:16:15.680 --> 00:16:16.919 align:center
Abhinav Bindra.
00:16:16.920 --> 00:16:19.479 align:center
That makes your average 8.5.
00:16:19.480 --> 00:16:21.959 align:center
8.5? Oh, it's close.
00:16:21.960 --> 00:16:25.520 align:center
Eight! Oh, no!
00:16:26.120 --> 00:16:27.279 align:center
So close!
00:16:27.280 --> 00:16:28.800 align:center
Man!
00:16:29.440 --> 00:16:31.159 align:center
But all the best to you, brother!
00:16:31.160 --> 00:16:32.479 align:center
- Thank you so much for coming to our show.
- Thank you.
00:16:32.480 --> 00:16:34.400 align:center
- Thank you so much.
- All the best, man. All the best.
00:16:38.160 --> 00:16:39.879 align:center
Incredible, man!
People are so talented.
00:16:39.880 --> 00:16:41.520 align:center
I forgot to mention Wild Stone again.
00:16:42.320 --> 00:16:43.719 align:center
There were so many good moments for it.
00:16:43.720 --> 00:16:45.240 align:center
I'll say it in the next one.
I'll definitely remember.
00:16:46.240 --> 00:16:48.759 align:center
Alright.
Give it up for the next act,
00:16:48.760 --> 00:16:51.920 align:center
Chintan Ashish Desai,
aka Big Smoke.
00:16:59.160 --> 00:17:00.240 align:center
Check, check, check, yeah.
00:17:03.440 --> 00:17:04.720 align:center
- Yep.
- It's a nice beat.
00:17:04.960 --> 00:17:07.119 align:center
So, man, I've heard that
fat rappers can't rap fast.
00:17:08.760 --> 00:17:10.040 align:center
Let me show you guys something.
00:17:11.240 --> 00:17:12.079 align:center
Yeah.
00:18:05.000 --> 00:18:05.960 align:center
Yeah!
00:18:06.120 --> 00:18:07.520 align:center
- Let's go.
- Thank you.
00:18:09.720 --> 00:18:10.800 align:center
Incredible!
00:18:12.160 --> 00:18:13.719 align:center
Let me take some. Yeah.
00:18:13.720 --> 00:18:14.999 align:center
- Thank you.
- Wow, man.
00:18:15.000 --> 00:18:16.560 align:center
A huge round of applause for him!
00:18:17.680 --> 00:18:19.200 align:center
This is Badshah before Ozempic.
00:18:21.720 --> 00:18:23.319 align:center
Except you rapped better.
00:18:23.320 --> 00:18:24.800 align:center
Thank you, thank you.
00:18:25.320 --> 00:18:26.760 align:center
Thank you so much.
00:18:27.400 --> 00:18:29.319 align:center
Man, you're so good!
00:18:29.320 --> 00:18:30.919 align:center
- Thank you, thank you.
- Awesome, awesome.
00:18:30.920 --> 00:18:33.559 align:center
Thank you very much.
I'm a big fan of yours, sir.
00:18:33.560 --> 00:18:35.400 align:center
- Of course, you are.
- You're an inspiration, sir.
00:18:38.680 --> 00:18:39.680 align:center
Of course, you are.
00:18:39.840 --> 00:18:42.319 align:center
- So gross. That's just vile.
- He's talking about talent.
00:18:42.320 --> 00:18:43.599 align:center
- He's talking about talent.
- So am I.
00:18:43.600 --> 00:18:44.919 align:center
Hey, I'm talking about talent too.
00:18:44.920 --> 00:18:46.080 align:center
Why do you always expect
the worst from me?
00:18:46.760 --> 00:18:48.639 align:center
- But, Chintan bhai, that was a great rap.
- Yeah.
00:18:48.640 --> 00:18:51.719 align:center
If you could call me Biggie or Big Smoke,
I'd really appreciate it.
00:18:51.720 --> 00:18:53.720 align:center
- That's my stage name.
- So, Chintan bhai…
00:18:55.520 --> 00:18:56.440 align:center
Yes, sir.
00:18:56.720 --> 00:19:00.120 align:center
So why did you go with the name
Big Smoke if your name is Chintan?
00:19:00.400 --> 00:19:03.119 align:center
Back in school,
I used to wear this green jacket.
00:19:03.120 --> 00:19:04.879 align:center
So, everyone used to call me Big Smoke
00:19:04.880 --> 00:19:06.800 align:center
because there was a character
in San Andreas named Big Smoke.
00:19:07.440 --> 00:19:08.439 align:center
- So…
- Yes.
00:19:08.440 --> 00:19:11.079 align:center
I thought that whenever I achieved
something in life, I'd use this name.
00:19:11.080 --> 00:19:13.720 align:center
And it's also from
two of my favorite inspirations,
00:19:13.840 --> 00:19:14.959 align:center
Biggie and Pop Smoke.
00:19:14.960 --> 00:19:16.920 align:center
So, I became Big Smoke.
00:19:17.120 --> 00:19:18.440 align:center
And I'm big, and I smoke!
00:19:20.800 --> 00:19:22.719 align:center
- It all fits together.
- Yeah.
00:19:22.720 --> 00:19:24.800 align:center
- No, no, you're cute, man.
- Thank you.
00:19:25.040 --> 00:19:26.439 align:center
That's the first time
anyone's said that, but okay.
00:19:26.440 --> 00:19:28.520 align:center
Genuinely. I mean it.
00:19:29.640 --> 00:19:32.120 align:center
Buddy, aren't you hot?
00:19:32.320 --> 00:19:33.239 align:center
Extremely.
00:19:33.240 --> 00:19:35.639 align:center
- You must be sweating.
- Yeah, I am.
00:19:35.640 --> 00:19:37.919 align:center
So, I give you Wild Stone!
00:19:37.920 --> 00:19:38.880 align:center
Okay.
00:19:39.640 --> 00:19:41.759 align:center
What? That's so smooth!
00:19:41.760 --> 00:19:43.919 align:center
I finally managed to do
the Wild Stone integration.
00:19:43.920 --> 00:19:44.920 align:center
That was smooth, man!
00:19:45.200 --> 00:19:47.239 align:center
Here you go.
Take Wild Stone with you.
00:19:47.240 --> 00:19:48.960 align:center
- Okay, okay.
- Oh, man!
00:19:49.080 --> 00:19:50.239 align:center
Yeah.
00:19:50.240 --> 00:19:51.200 align:center
Nice.
00:19:52.520 --> 00:19:53.439 align:center
Smells nice.
00:19:53.440 --> 00:19:54.479 align:center
- Right?
- Yeah, yeah.
00:19:54.480 --> 00:19:55.839 align:center
- You can put it in your pocket.
- Smells nice.
00:19:55.840 --> 00:19:56.759 align:center
Oh, thank you so much.
00:19:56.760 --> 00:19:58.320 align:center
- I thought I had to give it back.
- No, you don't.
00:19:59.200 --> 00:20:00.240 align:center
It's all yours.
00:20:00.400 --> 00:20:02.039 align:center
Thank you so much.
At least I'm not leaving empty-handed.
00:20:02.040 --> 00:20:03.319 align:center
You'll need one each day.
00:20:03.320 --> 00:20:04.320 align:center
Yeah.
00:20:08.120 --> 00:20:10.240 align:center
- Come on, sir!
- Come on, man!
00:20:10.520 --> 00:20:11.880 align:center
Fair enough, fair enough.
00:20:12.320 --> 00:20:14.279 align:center
I mean, switch up your fragrances.
00:20:14.280 --> 00:20:15.200 align:center
No, no.
00:20:16.520 --> 00:20:18.040 align:center
When he tries to cover up what he said…
00:20:19.040 --> 00:20:21.519 align:center
I can't help myself, man.
Forgive me.
00:20:21.520 --> 00:20:23.199 align:center
If you're not comfortable,
we can move on.
00:20:23.200 --> 00:20:24.799 align:center
No, it's fine. I can take a joke.
00:20:24.800 --> 00:20:26.720 align:center
- It's fine. Yeah.
- No, it's not about the joke. It's just--
00:20:26.840 --> 00:20:28.039 align:center
Aren't you concerned about your health?
00:20:28.040 --> 00:20:29.199 align:center
I'm really concerned about my health,
00:20:29.200 --> 00:20:30.519 align:center
- but the thing is--
- No, you're not concerned.
00:20:30.520 --> 00:20:33.919 align:center
Dude, hold on.
Let the man speak.
00:20:33.920 --> 00:20:34.999 align:center
- Okay, go ahead.
- Can I?
00:20:35.000 --> 00:20:36.639 align:center
Up until now, I wasn't concerned.
00:20:36.640 --> 00:20:38.119 align:center
But when I dropped out of college,
00:20:38.120 --> 00:20:40.760 align:center
I really thought
I should lose some weight.
00:20:41.040 --> 00:20:45.520 align:center
Look, to be very frank,
being fat is just a technicality.
00:20:46.160 --> 00:20:47.760 align:center
- Yeah.
- Because if you think about it,
00:20:48.400 --> 00:20:51.440 align:center
on Earth, I could be 150 kilos.
00:20:52.120 --> 00:20:55.520 align:center
But if you send me to the Moon,
I'll weigh 50 kilos there.
00:20:56.640 --> 00:20:59.160 align:center
Send me to Mars,
and I'd be 35 kilos there.
00:20:59.520 --> 00:21:01.199 align:center
Basically, I'm not overweight.
00:21:01.200 --> 00:21:03.320 align:center
- Then?
- I'm just on the wrong planet.
00:21:04.880 --> 00:21:06.200 align:center
Agreed.
00:21:06.440 --> 00:21:07.479 align:center
Buddy, listen to me.
00:21:07.480 --> 00:21:09.080 align:center
- Go on.
- Start running.
00:21:09.200 --> 00:21:11.119 align:center
- Yeah?
- First, just walk.
00:21:11.120 --> 00:21:12.520 align:center
- Okay?
- Okay.
00:21:13.080 --> 00:21:14.040 align:center
Guys, please.
00:21:15.800 --> 00:21:18.279 align:center
- Okay.
- Please, I'm being very serious.
00:21:18.280 --> 00:21:19.399 align:center
- Yeah.
- Don't laugh.
00:21:19.400 --> 00:21:20.600 align:center
First things first, start walking.
00:21:20.760 --> 00:21:23.079 align:center
Harssh bhai, give him some advice.
00:21:23.080 --> 00:21:25.040 align:center
- No, I was just…
- He does that at home every day.
00:21:29.440 --> 00:21:31.599 align:center
- No, I…
- I was gonna ask if there are any tips
00:21:31.600 --> 00:21:32.679 align:center
from Bharti ma'am for me.
00:21:32.680 --> 00:21:33.719 align:center
I could try something.
00:21:33.720 --> 00:21:36.399 align:center
- No, I'm not kidding. Genuinely…
- Brother, can I be honest?
00:21:36.400 --> 00:21:37.999 align:center
- Yeah.
- Don't eat after 7:00 p.m.
00:21:38.000 --> 00:21:39.760 align:center
- Okay.
- And go to bed by 10:30 p.m.
00:21:40.480 --> 00:21:43.480 align:center
If you follow your circadian rhythm,
you'll be all set.
00:21:43.600 --> 00:21:44.719 align:center
- For sure.
- What the fuck?
00:21:44.720 --> 00:21:46.880 align:center
Are we running a lab here or something?
00:21:47.760 --> 00:21:49.599 align:center
The poor guy came here to rap.
00:21:49.600 --> 00:21:50.879 align:center
"Go for a walk."
00:21:50.880 --> 00:21:53.119 align:center
- No, it's fine. I'm getting free advice.
- "Just add some honey…"
00:21:53.120 --> 00:21:54.880 align:center
That's not what he came here for!
00:21:55.120 --> 00:21:56.799 align:center
- No…
- I'm getting free advice, I'm liking it.
00:21:56.800 --> 00:21:57.719 align:center
Thank you.
00:21:57.720 --> 00:21:58.719 align:center
So, Chintan bhai,
00:21:58.720 --> 00:22:00.680 align:center
- apart from all these things…
- Yeah.
00:22:00.880 --> 00:22:02.919 align:center
it says here that
you've been in love with a girl
00:22:02.920 --> 00:22:03.800 align:center
- for the past--
- Oh, my God.
00:22:04.520 --> 00:22:06.520 align:center
- Yeah, you were saying?
- You're the one who wrote it.
00:22:07.320 --> 00:22:10.039 align:center
- He goes, "Oh, my God!"
- I wasn't expecting that to come up.
00:22:10.040 --> 00:22:11.600 align:center
It's the first thing you wrote.
00:22:11.840 --> 00:22:14.279 align:center
I said I was in love with this girl
for three years.
00:22:14.280 --> 00:22:16.279 align:center
She had two or three relationships
in those years.
00:22:16.280 --> 00:22:18.520 align:center
Yeah, it was just one-sided love.
00:22:18.760 --> 00:22:20.600 align:center
And I've never moved on to this day.
00:22:21.120 --> 00:22:22.600 align:center
Oh, then get moving, man.
00:22:29.880 --> 00:22:32.639 align:center
- You must move…
- Back to square one.
00:22:32.640 --> 00:22:34.120 align:center
It's very important for you to move.
00:22:34.240 --> 00:22:36.399 align:center
Dude, I'm trying so hard
00:22:36.400 --> 00:22:38.479 align:center
- to change the topic.
- It's fine, bro. It's fine. I'm liking it.
00:22:38.480 --> 00:22:41.119 align:center
I was talking about moving--
He said he hasn't moved on.
00:22:41.120 --> 00:22:42.120 align:center
So, I told him to move on.
00:22:42.360 --> 00:22:44.600 align:center
He means moving on in life.
00:22:45.080 --> 00:22:46.400 align:center
What's your goal in life now?
00:22:47.480 --> 00:22:48.479 align:center
Don't say it.
00:22:48.480 --> 00:22:50.759 align:center
- I…
- Don't say it. Just don't say it.
00:22:50.760 --> 00:22:52.759 align:center
I know what you're about to say,
so I'll say it myself.
00:22:52.760 --> 00:22:55.360 align:center
I just want to make enough money that
people stop asking how much I weigh.
00:22:56.440 --> 00:22:58.120 align:center
Wow. Incredible.
00:22:58.640 --> 00:22:59.560 align:center
Well said.
00:23:00.040 --> 00:23:01.960 align:center
Buddy, he has a lot of money too.
00:23:02.400 --> 00:23:03.800 align:center
And no one asks him, right?
00:23:04.040 --> 00:23:05.599 align:center
- Everyone asks.
- What do you know?
00:23:05.600 --> 00:23:07.360 align:center
That's the reason they ask him.
00:23:09.960 --> 00:23:12.439 align:center
You know, he was
the only one on this panel
00:23:12.440 --> 00:23:14.040 align:center
who'd never had an FIR filed against him.
00:23:16.280 --> 00:23:18.280 align:center
Now fat people are going to file
an FIR against you.
00:23:19.120 --> 00:23:20.120 align:center
He is cute.
00:23:21.000 --> 00:23:21.880 align:center
Thanks.
00:23:24.560 --> 00:23:26.399 align:center
You've released 70 songs.
00:23:26.400 --> 00:23:29.559 align:center
Yes, in the last four years, I've released
five EPs and one mixtape.
00:23:29.560 --> 00:23:30.520 align:center
Where'd you pull those out from?
00:23:38.200 --> 00:23:39.119 align:center
That was funny.
00:23:39.120 --> 00:23:40.760 align:center
- I'm so sorry. You know what?
- It was funny.
00:23:41.000 --> 00:23:43.120 align:center
I was drinking water,
and my mind just wandered.
00:23:46.520 --> 00:23:48.399 align:center
So, you were saying?
00:23:48.400 --> 00:23:49.600 align:center
"Where'd you pull those out from?"
00:23:52.280 --> 00:23:53.800 align:center
Which label? I was just…
00:23:57.040 --> 00:23:59.120 align:center
- Oh, my God!
- I'm so sorry. But you are cute.
00:24:01.600 --> 00:24:02.960 align:center
Why do you smoke?
00:24:03.840 --> 00:24:05.879 align:center
I've tried to quit.
I've cut down now.
00:24:05.880 --> 00:24:07.639 align:center
I used to smoke a lot more.
Now I smoke less.
00:24:07.640 --> 00:24:08.960 align:center
Do your parents know about this?
00:24:09.200 --> 00:24:11.079 align:center
Yeah. Dad knows, Mom knows.
00:24:11.080 --> 00:24:12.600 align:center
But the relatives don't know, so…
00:24:12.880 --> 00:24:14.080 align:center
- Now they'll know.
- Sorry.
00:24:15.680 --> 00:24:17.520 align:center
No, don't be sorry.
His family didn't know either.
00:24:17.640 --> 00:24:18.520 align:center
Okay.
00:24:19.800 --> 00:24:21.120 align:center
His story made the news.
00:24:22.520 --> 00:24:24.240 align:center
His name didn't even have
an "R" in it before.
00:24:25.720 --> 00:24:27.520 align:center
Say what you will,
but I never made it to the highest court.
00:24:27.880 --> 00:24:28.800 align:center
Am I right?
00:24:31.200 --> 00:24:32.439 align:center
I think Samay bhai did.
00:24:32.440 --> 00:24:35.040 align:center
- Yeah…
- He might as well have a monthly pass.
00:24:36.520 --> 00:24:38.200 align:center
He just drops by to mark his attendance.
00:24:39.520 --> 00:24:41.399 align:center
- It's true.
- He marks his attendance and says,
00:24:41.400 --> 00:24:43.960 align:center
"We'll worry about the scandal later.
Just mark me present."
00:24:44.280 --> 00:24:46.920 align:center
It says here you have a palindrome.
00:24:47.120 --> 00:24:49.680 align:center
I don't have a palindrome.
I made a palindrome.
00:24:49.880 --> 00:24:51.880 align:center
- Palindrome is a rap style.
- Oh, okay.
00:24:52.000 --> 00:24:54.039 align:center
Basically, I wrote a rap
00:24:54.040 --> 00:24:56.479 align:center
using "B" alliteration
throughout the entire verse.
00:24:56.480 --> 00:24:59.120 align:center
- Just B, B, B?
- Just B. Every word starts with B.
00:24:59.560 --> 00:25:01.799 align:center
And when it ends,
I sing it backwards too.
00:25:01.800 --> 00:25:03.919 align:center
- Then let's hear it.
- That's really interesting.
00:25:03.920 --> 00:25:04.920 align:center
- Wow.
- Let's go.
00:25:24.120 --> 00:25:25.880 align:center
- Incredible!
- Wow!
00:25:26.560 --> 00:25:27.639 align:center
That was amazing, man.
00:25:27.640 --> 00:25:29.319 align:center
- Thank you so much.
- All the words you said at the beginning--
00:25:29.320 --> 00:25:31.839 align:center
From start to finish and back again,
without changing the meaning.
00:25:31.840 --> 00:25:34.239 align:center
Without changing rhymes, without
changing anything, with alliteration.
00:25:34.240 --> 00:25:35.800 align:center
- Incredible!
- Very nice.
00:25:36.640 --> 00:25:38.680 align:center
I'm the only one. Thank you.
00:25:38.800 --> 00:25:39.880 align:center
Chandan ji…
00:25:40.320 --> 00:25:42.679 align:center
Say something nice,
and then we'll call the next act.
00:25:42.680 --> 00:25:43.880 align:center
- Something nice.
- You're very cute.
00:25:45.200 --> 00:25:46.959 align:center
Thank you, sir.
You've said it so many times.
00:25:46.960 --> 00:25:48.920 align:center
Had she said it that many times,
things would've been different.
00:25:50.240 --> 00:25:53.079 align:center
- Lover boy!
- Thank you. Thank you.
00:25:53.080 --> 00:25:55.080 align:center
Should I wear a… frock and say it?
00:25:56.440 --> 00:25:57.799 align:center
Thank you so much.
00:25:57.800 --> 00:25:59.719 align:center
A big round of applause for Chintan!
00:25:59.720 --> 00:26:00.719 align:center
- Thank you, Chintan.
- Thank you.
00:26:00.720 --> 00:26:02.520 align:center
Thank you so much, guys.
Thank you so much.
00:26:03.120 --> 00:26:05.919 align:center
So… let's start with Balraj.
00:26:05.920 --> 00:26:07.400 align:center
Balraj ji, what's your score?
00:26:08.240 --> 00:26:09.559 align:center
Biggie, my man,
00:26:09.560 --> 00:26:12.199 align:center
you are a very talented rap artist.
00:26:12.200 --> 00:26:13.599 align:center
- Thank you.
- I wish you keep growing.
00:26:13.600 --> 00:26:15.279 align:center
It's a ten out of ten
from my side for you.
00:26:15.280 --> 00:26:16.840 align:center
Thank you so much.
00:26:18.560 --> 00:26:20.120 align:center
I'll give you an eight.
00:26:20.440 --> 00:26:22.280 align:center
- Because I want you to win.
- Thank you.
00:26:22.840 --> 00:26:23.880 align:center
You are very cute.
00:26:25.160 --> 00:26:27.079 align:center
You get an 8.5 from me.
00:26:27.080 --> 00:26:28.640 align:center
Thank you so much.
00:26:29.320 --> 00:26:31.120 align:center
- Big Smoke, my brother…
- Yes, bro.
00:26:31.520 --> 00:26:34.439 align:center
From me-- But you've got to
take this seriously, okay?
00:26:34.440 --> 00:26:35.719 align:center
- Yeah, for sure.
- You need to start working on it.
00:26:35.720 --> 00:26:37.639 align:center
For sure. I'll be back
in front of you in one year.
00:26:37.640 --> 00:26:38.600 align:center
You won't recognize me.
00:26:39.120 --> 00:26:40.039 align:center
- Alright, done.
- I promise.
00:26:40.040 --> 00:26:41.840 align:center
He wouldn't recognize you regardless.
00:26:44.680 --> 00:26:45.640 align:center
Sure.
00:26:46.360 --> 00:26:47.399 align:center
8.5.
00:26:47.400 --> 00:26:48.960 align:center
Thank you so much.
00:26:49.280 --> 00:26:52.239 align:center
I'm giving you a ten out of ten, bro.
You were flawless.
00:26:52.240 --> 00:26:54.279 align:center
Thank you so much, bro.
Thank you so much.
00:26:54.280 --> 00:26:56.440 align:center
That makes your average a nine.
00:26:59.960 --> 00:27:02.000 align:center
- 7.5!
- That's it?
00:27:05.520 --> 00:27:07.200 align:center
I… I don't know.
00:27:07.360 --> 00:27:08.960 align:center
I just thought 7.5 would be a good score.
00:27:09.160 --> 00:27:11.800 align:center
- Can I say something? Just one thing.
- Yes, please go ahead.
00:27:12.040 --> 00:27:15.400 align:center
And I want to say this in all seriousness.
It's what I wanted to tell him.
00:27:16.120 --> 00:27:17.760 align:center
- Aham Brahmasmi.
- Yes.
00:27:18.400 --> 00:27:20.000 align:center
- You know what that means?
- I know…
00:27:20.960 --> 00:27:23.760 align:center
- It means, "I am everything…"
- "I am everything…"
00:27:24.000 --> 00:27:26.240 align:center
Right? So you are everything.
00:27:26.840 --> 00:27:28.800 align:center
So, get cracking, okay?
Come on, man!
00:27:29.360 --> 00:27:32.280 align:center
I'm trying to motivate him.
What's so funny about that?
00:27:33.280 --> 00:27:35.360 align:center
You just couldn't resist saying "moti."
00:27:37.760 --> 00:27:40.600 align:center
- Chandan is a terrible man.
- No, it's fine. He's really cute.
00:27:48.360 --> 00:27:50.519 align:center
- Thank you so much for coming, brother!
- Thank you so much.
00:27:50.520 --> 00:27:51.920 align:center
- Thank you so much.
- Thank you, thank you.
00:27:54.240 --> 00:27:55.440 align:center
What a guy, man!
00:27:56.400 --> 00:27:57.639 align:center
That was so much fun.
00:27:57.640 --> 00:27:58.720 align:center
Great guy.
00:27:59.680 --> 00:28:01.960 align:center
I can't believe I'm the moral compass
of the panel today.
00:28:05.520 --> 00:28:08.480 align:center
Make some noise for the next act,
Kapil Dinkar!
00:28:10.760 --> 00:28:11.600 align:center
Oh, man!
00:28:17.920 --> 00:28:18.880 align:center
Well…
00:28:19.040 --> 00:28:20.800 align:center
- Sir, that was last season.
- Did you start again?
00:28:21.640 --> 00:28:22.760 align:center
You're doing it again?
00:28:23.200 --> 00:28:24.800 align:center
Getting shut down once
wasn't enough for you?
00:28:25.560 --> 00:28:27.240 align:center
- Oh gosh!
- Bro.
00:28:28.400 --> 00:28:30.239 align:center
- Let it be.
- What state's police force is this?
00:28:30.240 --> 00:28:32.920 align:center
You know you can't just wear
a police uniform like that, right?
00:28:33.400 --> 00:28:34.640 align:center
Actually, I have permission.
00:28:35.520 --> 00:28:38.080 align:center
But you can't wear a police uniform
if you're not a cop yourself.
00:28:38.680 --> 00:28:42.039 align:center
Actually, I'm a singer, lyricist, and
composer. That's what feeds my soul.
00:28:42.040 --> 00:28:44.399 align:center
And apart from that,
I'm a cop to pay the bills.
00:28:44.400 --> 00:28:45.399 align:center
- Oh, you are a cop!
- Yes.
00:28:45.400 --> 00:28:46.520 align:center
Sir, sorry! Sorry!
00:28:49.160 --> 00:28:50.240 align:center
Can I remove this?
00:28:50.840 --> 00:28:52.559 align:center
Yes, please do whatever you want, sir.
00:28:52.560 --> 00:28:54.519 align:center
I'll just come over there.
00:28:54.520 --> 00:28:56.960 align:center
Do you need anything, sir?
Would you like some tea?
00:28:57.240 --> 00:28:58.199 align:center
- Tea?
- Sure, I'd like tea.
00:28:58.200 --> 00:28:59.360 align:center
Get him some tea.
00:29:01.800 --> 00:29:02.719 align:center
Yes, please.
00:29:02.720 --> 00:29:04.400 align:center
Look, I'm getting respect
from Samay bhai.
00:29:04.560 --> 00:29:07.040 align:center
- That's the most important thing.
- Sir, please begin. Just start.
00:29:07.680 --> 00:29:09.120 align:center
- Alright.
- Let's have a round of applause!
00:29:10.800 --> 00:29:14.400 align:center
So, I saved up my salary
from my job and made a song.
00:29:14.640 --> 00:29:16.639 align:center
I wrote it, composed it,
00:29:16.640 --> 00:29:17.600 align:center
and I'm the one singing it.
00:29:17.880 --> 00:29:18.800 align:center
So, let's begin.
00:29:19.000 --> 00:29:19.880 align:center
Nice.
00:29:40.520 --> 00:29:41.360 align:center
Wow!
00:30:16.600 --> 00:30:17.640 align:center
Thank you so much.
00:30:17.760 --> 00:30:20.559 align:center
- Very nice! Fantastic!
- Incredible, sir!
00:30:20.560 --> 00:30:21.479 align:center
Thank you.
00:30:21.480 --> 00:30:23.040 align:center
- Very good. Very good.
- Thank you.
00:30:23.680 --> 00:30:24.520 align:center
Thank you.
00:30:24.720 --> 00:30:27.000 align:center
So, what score would you like, sir?
00:30:28.200 --> 00:30:29.599 align:center
Just give me what I've written down.
00:30:29.600 --> 00:30:31.159 align:center
Yeah, I don't know, but I hope--
00:30:31.160 --> 00:30:32.400 align:center
Are you really a cop?
00:30:32.520 --> 00:30:33.360 align:center
Yes.
00:30:33.840 --> 00:30:34.839 align:center
I can't believe
00:30:34.840 --> 00:30:37.879 align:center
- that a cop has come to perform!
- Wow, this is a huge deal!
00:30:37.880 --> 00:30:40.960 align:center
I came to check things out
so there won't be any trouble.
00:30:41.360 --> 00:30:43.039 align:center
- That was wonderful. You sang so well.
- Thank you.
00:30:43.040 --> 00:30:45.160 align:center
- You're so talented and…
- You sang beautifully.
00:30:45.320 --> 00:30:46.999 align:center
- You're wonderful.
- All the people facing FIRs
00:30:47.000 --> 00:30:48.480 align:center
are full of praise for him.
00:30:50.640 --> 00:30:53.440 align:center
But it's so cool, man!
Even the police watch our show?
00:30:53.880 --> 00:30:55.200 align:center
- Absolutely.
- It's just the police watching it!
00:30:57.760 --> 00:31:00.280 align:center
Why are you so quiet?
Just because his name is Kapil?
00:31:05.280 --> 00:31:08.279 align:center
You can crack a joke or two. It's fine.
He's just Kapil by name.
00:31:08.280 --> 00:31:10.319 align:center
You don't even have a case against you.
This is a good excuse to get one.
00:31:10.320 --> 00:31:12.760 align:center
Precisely why I'm keeping quiet.
I don't want a case against me.
00:31:13.200 --> 00:31:14.560 align:center
This is my first experience, sir.
00:31:15.080 --> 00:31:15.960 align:center
Okay.
00:31:16.280 --> 00:31:19.119 align:center
Kapil ji, how long have you been
in the police force?
00:31:19.120 --> 00:31:21.040 align:center
I was selected in '21.
00:31:21.920 --> 00:31:24.999 align:center
So if I call 100 right now,
will your phone ring?
00:31:25.000 --> 00:31:25.880 align:center
No.
00:31:26.440 --> 00:31:28.080 align:center
Okay, Kapil ji…
00:31:28.200 --> 00:31:30.480 align:center
Kapil ji, what does it
feel like to be a cop?
00:31:30.880 --> 00:31:33.039 align:center
It feels great
because it was my mother's dream.
00:31:33.040 --> 00:31:35.159 align:center
My mom always dreamed
I'd wear the uniform.
00:31:35.160 --> 00:31:36.720 align:center
And my dream was always music.
00:31:37.640 --> 00:31:38.719 align:center
Wow, that's amazing.
00:31:38.720 --> 00:31:42.080 align:center
With a physique like mine,
could I become a cop?
00:31:42.640 --> 00:31:45.360 align:center
You're already very active.
Your dancing is incredible.
00:31:45.600 --> 00:31:47.919 align:center
You dance so well with that physique.
00:31:47.920 --> 00:31:51.000 align:center
- I asked the question just to hear that!
- No, but…
00:31:51.160 --> 00:31:53.360 align:center
You can't be a DIG,
but you can be a PIG.
00:31:56.320 --> 00:31:58.000 align:center
- Limbachiyaa!
- Put it down.
00:32:00.080 --> 00:32:01.799 align:center
Sir, but you came here--
00:32:01.800 --> 00:32:04.400 align:center
I'm sure you told your senior
you were going on Latent.
00:32:04.680 --> 00:32:05.800 align:center
What was their reaction?
00:32:06.080 --> 00:32:08.800 align:center
Actually, I am the only cop
who has permission for music.
00:32:09.000 --> 00:32:10.080 align:center
- What?
- From the department. Yes.
00:32:10.560 --> 00:32:13.199 align:center
And touch wood, I mean,
the officers are supportive.
00:32:13.200 --> 00:32:16.520 align:center
They're especially supportive
when you do well at certain things.
00:32:17.040 --> 00:32:18.480 align:center
You did an amazing job.
00:32:20.680 --> 00:32:23.199 align:center
- Really. No…
- We don't know what to say to you.
00:32:23.200 --> 00:32:26.520 align:center
Genuinely. Genuinely,
you did an amazing job.
00:32:27.800 --> 00:32:28.840 align:center
Kapil ji.
00:32:29.000 --> 00:32:31.479 align:center
- Yes, sir?
- What rank do you hold in the police?
00:32:31.480 --> 00:32:32.920 align:center
- I'm a constable.
- Okay.
00:32:33.320 --> 00:32:35.440 align:center
Oh! And I was
sitting here getting scared.
00:32:40.400 --> 00:32:42.200 align:center
A constable is the one
who comes to make the arrest.
00:32:44.000 --> 00:32:45.999 align:center
- Okay? The arrest--
- No, sir. I'm a good person.
00:32:46.000 --> 00:32:47.880 align:center
Neither a DIG nor a PIG
comes to arrest you.
00:32:48.000 --> 00:32:49.879 align:center
- Sir, I…
- A constable makes the arrest.
00:32:49.880 --> 00:32:51.680 align:center
I had something else going on
in the back of my mind.
00:32:52.120 --> 00:32:53.040 align:center
I'm so sorry, sir.
00:32:54.640 --> 00:32:57.319 align:center
It says here you have
also written eleven books.
00:32:57.320 --> 00:32:59.240 align:center
- Eleven books?
- My books are a work in progress.
00:32:59.440 --> 00:33:01.319 align:center
I've completed three.
00:33:01.320 --> 00:33:03.840 align:center
So does that mean all crime
has ended in UP now?
00:33:04.160 --> 00:33:07.200 align:center
It has definitely reduced.
93% of the criminals
00:33:07.480 --> 00:33:10.359 align:center
who were caught
have been properly sentenced.
00:33:10.360 --> 00:33:12.120 align:center
More than 5,000
00:33:12.720 --> 00:33:14.999 align:center
Mission Shakti centers
that have been established
00:33:15.000 --> 00:33:16.679 align:center
are also functioning very effectively.
00:33:16.680 --> 00:33:18.240 align:center
So, now you have time for all this.
00:33:18.440 --> 00:33:20.959 align:center
No, it's not that.
I work night shifts
00:33:20.960 --> 00:33:23.239 align:center
and spend my free daytime hours
focusing on my artistic life.
00:33:23.240 --> 00:33:26.000 align:center
- Oh, Dinkar! Let's go, brother.
- That's amazing.
00:33:26.760 --> 00:33:29.080 align:center
- "Dinkar!"
- That's so-- That's so beautiful.
00:33:30.000 --> 00:33:32.159 align:center
So, sir, aren't you scared?
I mean, as a cop--
00:33:32.160 --> 00:33:34.199 align:center
I mean, you're a constable.
Aren't you afraid
00:33:34.200 --> 00:33:36.080 align:center
that a crime might occur in UP?
00:33:36.200 --> 00:33:38.200 align:center
It must be a very scary job, right?
00:33:38.480 --> 00:33:40.399 align:center
No. We've been given a lot of freedom,
00:33:40.400 --> 00:33:43.720 align:center
and we're making good use of it.
You must have seen it in the news.
00:33:46.320 --> 00:33:47.559 align:center
- Yeah, that's true.
- Yes.
00:33:47.560 --> 00:33:48.640 align:center
- Yes.
- That's true.
00:33:49.760 --> 00:33:50.680 align:center
Go on, say it.
00:33:53.640 --> 00:33:54.679 align:center
- Go ahead.
- Man--
00:33:54.680 --> 00:33:55.920 align:center
You are a pure soul.
00:33:56.600 --> 00:33:58.199 align:center
- Pure soul.
- You are an amazing singer.
00:33:58.200 --> 00:33:59.439 align:center
- You are amazing.
- So good.
00:33:59.440 --> 00:34:00.560 align:center
Wonderful.
Would you like some tea?
00:34:02.240 --> 00:34:04.200 align:center
You asked at the start,
but you still haven't given me any.
00:34:06.720 --> 00:34:09.600 align:center
Sir, you're so sweet.
Do you ever hit anyone?
00:34:09.719 --> 00:34:11.239 align:center
Have you ever laid a hand on anyone?
00:34:11.760 --> 00:34:14.238 align:center
See, that's what I'm saying.
I'm an artistic person.
00:34:14.239 --> 00:34:15.799 align:center
I can't really do that sort of thing.
00:34:15.800 --> 00:34:17.840 align:center
I told you he was a great guy!
00:34:18.040 --> 00:34:19.359 align:center
- You're too sweet.
- Too sweet.
00:34:19.360 --> 00:34:21.199 align:center
If we ever commit a crime,
please be the one to arrest us.
00:34:22.199 --> 00:34:24.359 align:center
First of all, tell me,
why would you commit a crime?
00:34:24.360 --> 00:34:26.198 align:center
- No, I won't, sir. I'm not a bad guy.
- He's done it before.
00:34:26.199 --> 00:34:28.760 align:center
- No way!
- It's always on his mind.
00:34:29.480 --> 00:34:31.440 align:center
- The "joint" commissioner came for him.
- No, no, no.
00:34:35.239 --> 00:34:37.239 align:center
Kapil ji, would you like
something to eat? Some fries?
00:34:37.400 --> 00:34:39.919 align:center
- No, thanks.
- Here you go, Kapil ji. For you.
00:34:39.920 --> 00:34:41.120 align:center
- What is it?
- Sir, please.
00:34:41.639 --> 00:34:42.679 align:center
I'll give them to you under the table.
00:34:44.480 --> 00:34:45.800 align:center
He was waiting to say that.
00:34:50.480 --> 00:34:52.560 align:center
Wow, you actually did it.
00:34:52.800 --> 00:34:55.840 align:center
- Sir, what are you talking about?
- Hey, someone get a chair for him.
00:34:56.719 --> 00:34:58.079 align:center
You've mentioned here
00:34:58.080 --> 00:35:01.520 align:center
something about magical ability--
Inability to get lost.
00:35:01.760 --> 00:35:04.839 align:center
I can explain what that means
in a line from one of my songs.
00:35:04.840 --> 00:35:05.760 align:center
Okay.
00:35:06.080 --> 00:35:08.080 align:center
I've always
00:35:08.920 --> 00:35:13.200 align:center
Spoken to the rivers, mountains
Trees, oceans, clouds
00:35:13.520 --> 00:35:17.320 align:center
And birds
00:35:17.640 --> 00:35:20.999 align:center
I just want to get lost in them.
The rivers, mountains, birds.
00:35:21.000 --> 00:35:21.919 align:center
- Nature.
- Nature.
00:35:21.920 --> 00:35:26.640 align:center
Then why did you come on Latent?
00:35:27.520 --> 00:35:29.800 align:center
There are no rivers here
00:35:30.440 --> 00:35:32.360 align:center
There's just a mountain
00:35:39.560 --> 00:35:40.800 align:center
Here's my response.
00:35:42.280 --> 00:35:46.520 align:center
Because the first season was shut down
00:35:47.160 --> 00:35:51.600 align:center
On account of our brother's actions
00:35:52.360 --> 00:35:55.720 align:center
That's why BeerBiceps
00:35:55.960 --> 00:35:59.400 align:center
Is no longer seen around here
00:35:59.520 --> 00:36:00.640 align:center
Amazing!
00:36:02.240 --> 00:36:03.680 align:center
- Wow, man.
- That's amazing.
00:36:04.120 --> 00:36:07.599 align:center
So, Kapil ji, you have
a very artistic temperament.
00:36:07.600 --> 00:36:09.600 align:center
So, do you have a love story or something?
00:36:10.400 --> 00:36:11.640 align:center
What are you getting at?
00:36:11.760 --> 00:36:13.919 align:center
I mean, I just want to know, how do you--
00:36:13.920 --> 00:36:15.880 align:center
Like, do you use handcuffs there as well?
00:36:19.320 --> 00:36:20.600 align:center
I should have some tea first.
00:36:22.040 --> 00:36:23.680 align:center
I told you to drink it earlier.
00:36:24.680 --> 00:36:25.600 align:center
Yes.
00:36:26.120 --> 00:36:27.640 align:center
Look, let me tell you something.
00:36:28.480 --> 00:36:30.560 align:center
If you ever fall in love,
fall in love with an artist.
00:36:30.920 --> 00:36:33.280 align:center
Because they can romanticize
even the smallest things.
00:36:34.480 --> 00:36:36.519 align:center
For example, if someone gets a fever,
00:36:36.520 --> 00:36:38.960 align:center
and their lover is an artist,
00:36:39.240 --> 00:36:41.160 align:center
they won't just give them paracetamol.
00:36:41.720 --> 00:36:44.680 align:center
They'll say, "What do you need that for?
You're already so hot."
00:36:45.120 --> 00:36:46.720 align:center
So, I wrote a song that goes…
00:37:05.560 --> 00:37:06.599 align:center
Nice one!
00:37:06.600 --> 00:37:09.800 align:center
So you see, an artistic person
can even romanticize paracetamol.
00:37:10.560 --> 00:37:12.400 align:center
Don't you go around catching criminals?
00:37:12.720 --> 00:37:15.559 align:center
Like, what happens when there's
a need to carry out an encounter?
00:37:15.560 --> 00:37:17.199 align:center
When a criminal comes
before him, he goes,
00:37:17.200 --> 00:37:20.159 align:center
Oh, you're running away, are you?
00:37:20.160 --> 00:37:22.880 align:center
I have to carry out an encounter
00:37:23.200 --> 00:37:26.520 align:center
I'm gonna shoot you
00:37:34.280 --> 00:37:36.200 align:center
Incredible!
00:37:36.800 --> 00:37:38.879 align:center
Very good! Excellent!
00:37:38.880 --> 00:37:39.720 align:center
Thank you.
00:37:40.200 --> 00:37:42.120 align:center
"I'm gonna shoot you." Amazing.
00:37:43.640 --> 00:37:45.479 align:center
- Excellent, sir.
- A huge round of applause
00:37:45.480 --> 00:37:47.240 align:center
- for Kapil Dinkar, everyone.
- Thank you.
00:37:49.560 --> 00:37:51.879 align:center
Sir, I genuinely enjoyed that.
00:37:51.880 --> 00:37:54.719 align:center
Kudos to you for your passion
and your beautiful singing.
00:37:54.720 --> 00:37:56.359 align:center
And you're an amazing person.
00:37:56.360 --> 00:37:57.439 align:center
Thank you so much.
00:37:57.440 --> 00:38:00.720 align:center
Having an Indian police officer on our
show has really boosted our credibility.
00:38:00.920 --> 00:38:03.960 align:center
And I have nothing but respect
and love for you.
00:38:04.080 --> 00:38:06.759 align:center
For everything you do,
and for everything the police do for us.
00:38:06.760 --> 00:38:09.439 align:center
- Ten out of ten from me, sir.
- Thank you.
00:38:09.440 --> 00:38:10.439 align:center
Ten.
00:38:10.440 --> 00:38:11.759 align:center
- Ten out of ten, sir.
- Thank you.
00:38:11.760 --> 00:38:12.880 align:center
Come on, Harssh.
00:38:13.840 --> 00:38:15.040 align:center
Sir, it's a ten for you.
00:38:15.360 --> 00:38:16.319 align:center
Ten, ten, ten.
00:38:16.320 --> 00:38:18.039 align:center
I hope you gave yourself a ten as well.
00:38:18.040 --> 00:38:19.599 align:center
It's a ten out of ten from me.
00:38:19.600 --> 00:38:22.160 align:center
Sir, that brings your average
to a perfect ten.
00:38:23.520 --> 00:38:24.600 align:center
- Shall I?
- Yes.
00:38:34.960 --> 00:38:37.080 align:center
Man, you can't set off an explosion
in front of the police.
00:38:45.560 --> 00:38:46.759 align:center
Amazing!
00:38:46.760 --> 00:38:48.280 align:center
Amazing, sir!
00:38:49.600 --> 00:38:52.319 align:center
Thank you so much for coming, sir.
I love you so much.
00:38:52.320 --> 00:38:54.559 align:center
You win 100,000 rupees.
00:38:54.560 --> 00:38:55.520 align:center
Really?
00:38:57.200 --> 00:38:59.559 align:center
In addition, courtesy of Flipkart Minutes,
00:38:59.560 --> 00:39:01.880 align:center
you have a chance to win
an extra 50,000 rupees.
00:39:02.240 --> 00:39:04.200 align:center
- I see.
- I'm going to ask you one question.
00:39:04.840 --> 00:39:06.120 align:center
And you have to answer it.
00:39:07.560 --> 00:39:08.720 align:center
Here's the question.
00:39:08.920 --> 00:39:12.120 align:center
Right now on Flipkart Minutes,
you can order kiwis.
00:39:12.560 --> 00:39:14.840 align:center
So, how much does one kiwi cost?
00:39:16.320 --> 00:39:18.040 align:center
Okay? Kiwis are usually pretty expensive.
00:39:18.720 --> 00:39:20.040 align:center
Here are your options.
00:39:21.160 --> 00:39:22.120 align:center
One hundred rupees.
00:39:22.640 --> 00:39:23.720 align:center
Fifty rupees.
00:39:23.960 --> 00:39:25.000 align:center
Forty rupees.
00:39:25.440 --> 00:39:26.440 align:center
Or nine rupees.
00:39:26.920 --> 00:39:27.800 align:center
Nine rupees.
00:39:28.720 --> 00:39:29.640 align:center
Nine rupees?
00:39:30.440 --> 00:39:32.440 align:center
And it's the right answer!
00:39:33.920 --> 00:39:38.160 align:center
Flipkart Minutes offers the lowest prices
and super-fast delivery.
00:39:38.800 --> 00:39:41.279 align:center
You can get a kiwi
for nine rupees right now.
00:39:41.280 --> 00:39:42.920 align:center
- It's here already?
- Wow, it's here already!
00:39:43.400 --> 00:39:45.479 align:center
- It hasn't even been nine minutes.
- That's how fast it is, you know.
00:39:45.480 --> 00:39:47.159 align:center
- It didn't even take nine minutes.
- Incredible.
00:39:47.160 --> 00:39:49.519 align:center
And you get 50,000 rupees extra
from Flipkart Minutes.
00:39:49.520 --> 00:39:52.280 align:center
Thank you so much for joining us, sir.
I love you. Take care. Bye-bye.
00:39:52.560 --> 00:39:53.960 align:center
- A salute to you.
- Thank you so much.
00:39:55.280 --> 00:39:56.399 align:center
Alright.
00:39:56.400 --> 00:39:59.840 align:center
Make some noise for the next act,
Geni Kamki!
00:40:02.440 --> 00:40:03.360 align:center
Hello.
00:40:03.800 --> 00:40:04.680 align:center
The card…
00:40:13.360 --> 00:40:14.280 align:center
Make some noise!
00:40:53.480 --> 00:40:54.760 align:center
Let me sing you the scale tonight.
00:41:23.080 --> 00:41:24.120 align:center
That was amazing!
00:41:25.000 --> 00:41:26.000 align:center
Incredible!
00:41:27.560 --> 00:41:28.520 align:center
Thank you so much.
00:41:29.880 --> 00:41:31.520 align:center
Very good, Geni. Very good.
00:41:31.800 --> 00:41:33.919 align:center
- Thank you.
- Geni, you were so good!
00:41:33.920 --> 00:41:35.319 align:center
- Thank you so much, sir.
- What language did you sing in
00:41:35.320 --> 00:41:36.320 align:center
at the beginning?
00:41:36.440 --> 00:41:39.680 align:center
At the beginning, I was singing
in the Arunachali language.
00:41:40.120 --> 00:41:41.840 align:center
- My language…
- Wow, man!
00:41:42.920 --> 00:41:43.839 align:center
- Arunachal--
- That's actually
00:41:43.840 --> 00:41:45.359 align:center
my brother's unreleased song.
00:41:45.360 --> 00:41:46.999 align:center
It's unreleased?
And you released it here?
00:41:47.000 --> 00:41:48.039 align:center
My older brother--
00:41:48.040 --> 00:41:51.120 align:center
My older brother said
if I performed it here,
00:41:51.520 --> 00:41:53.800 align:center
he'd cast me as the actress
in the music video.
00:41:57.320 --> 00:41:58.880 align:center
- Amazing!
- So cute!
00:41:59.040 --> 00:42:02.560 align:center
By the way, I'm breaking this news
here today for the first time.
00:42:02.920 --> 00:42:04.120 align:center
Please keep it to yourselves.
00:42:04.440 --> 00:42:06.439 align:center
This is the first season
00:42:06.440 --> 00:42:08.880 align:center
that will also stream on Netflix.
00:42:12.480 --> 00:42:13.520 align:center
That's right.
00:42:14.640 --> 00:42:17.080 align:center
So, your brother's song
is going to be on Netflix.
00:42:19.960 --> 00:42:21.479 align:center
- This is on Netflix?
- Yeah.
00:42:21.480 --> 00:42:22.640 align:center
- Are you serious?
- Yeah.
00:42:23.480 --> 00:42:24.560 align:center
You're doing very good.
00:42:28.480 --> 00:42:29.600 align:center
Nice one!
00:42:31.280 --> 00:42:33.799 align:center
- That was too good. Fantastic.
- Thank you so much, sir.
00:42:33.800 --> 00:42:36.440 align:center
How are you, like,
so full of energy and joy?
00:42:36.840 --> 00:42:38.399 align:center
Oh! Alright.
00:42:38.400 --> 00:42:40.719 align:center
Actually, sir,
I took a nap before coming here.
00:42:40.720 --> 00:42:43.000 align:center
- A nap?
- I mean, I took a power nap.
00:42:44.000 --> 00:42:44.920 align:center
So…
00:42:45.440 --> 00:42:47.720 align:center
- Did you come directly from Arunachal?
- Yes, sir.
00:42:51.440 --> 00:42:53.839 align:center
- Yes, sir. I'm from Arunachal.
- Are we in the army?
00:42:53.840 --> 00:42:54.879 align:center
- You scolded him!
- No, no.
00:42:54.880 --> 00:42:56.720 align:center
- "Yes, sir!"
- No, no, no.
00:42:59.480 --> 00:43:00.760 align:center
Damn, sir…
00:43:02.040 --> 00:43:04.279 align:center
- I don't understand anything.
- Man--
00:43:04.280 --> 00:43:06.560 align:center
She's so confused,
she doesn't even know how to stand.
00:43:06.960 --> 00:43:08.919 align:center
- Please don't be so cute.
- She's so cute.
00:43:08.920 --> 00:43:11.520 align:center
Harssh bhai will end up adopting you
and start a baby vlog.
00:43:13.920 --> 00:43:15.600 align:center
He's short on kids these days.
00:43:16.160 --> 00:43:17.839 align:center
- His content's going downhill too.
- Damn!
00:43:17.840 --> 00:43:18.680 align:center
There'll be more.
00:43:18.840 --> 00:43:21.560 align:center
Do you live in Mumbai or Arunachal?
00:43:22.040 --> 00:43:23.360 align:center
Sir, I live in Guwahati.
00:43:23.720 --> 00:43:25.679 align:center
- Oh…
- I study in Guwahati, sir.
00:43:25.680 --> 00:43:27.520 align:center
Can you get my FIR in Guwahati dropped?
00:43:30.800 --> 00:43:33.160 align:center
Come on, help me out.
00:43:33.360 --> 00:43:34.639 align:center
What do you want me
to drop in Guwahati?
00:43:34.640 --> 00:43:37.599 align:center
Teach me something in the language
of Guwahati, if you know it.
00:43:37.600 --> 00:43:38.599 align:center
- Guwahati?
- I…
00:43:38.600 --> 00:43:40.679 align:center
He said to get an FIR in Guwahati dropped.
00:43:40.680 --> 00:43:44.120 align:center
What should I say so my clip goes viral
in Guwahati and my FIR gets withdrawn?
00:43:45.600 --> 00:43:47.280 align:center
Please forgive me.
00:43:48.000 --> 00:43:49.479 align:center
- Please forgive me.
- "Please…"
00:43:49.480 --> 00:43:51.920 align:center
He made his apology back then.
Give him something new.
00:43:56.200 --> 00:43:57.199 align:center
Something creative.
00:43:57.200 --> 00:43:59.320 align:center
Sir, actually,
you're asking the wrong person.
00:43:59.440 --> 00:44:01.799 align:center
You see, I'm not from Guwahati.
I'm from Arunachal.
00:44:01.800 --> 00:44:04.359 align:center
- You just mentioned Guwahati.
- I'm just studying there, sir.
00:44:04.360 --> 00:44:05.440 align:center
What do you study there?
00:44:07.080 --> 00:44:08.160 align:center
Homeopathy, sir.
00:44:09.160 --> 00:44:11.040 align:center
So this thing that keeps happening to you,
00:44:11.480 --> 00:44:13.640 align:center
is it because of some
homeopathic medicine?
00:44:15.840 --> 00:44:17.600 align:center
You should try some allopathy.
00:44:19.360 --> 00:44:20.719 align:center
There's something about you.
00:44:20.720 --> 00:44:22.839 align:center
Okay, one minute. Tell me something.
Are you on Instagram?
00:44:22.840 --> 00:44:25.520 align:center
- Yes, sir.
- That video that went viral,
00:44:25.640 --> 00:44:27.320 align:center
- the one--
- Yes, sir, that's me!
00:44:27.920 --> 00:44:29.839 align:center
- Wow, that's amazing!
- Which video?
00:44:29.840 --> 00:44:30.999 align:center
- Which video?
- Which video?
00:44:31.000 --> 00:44:34.039 align:center
The one where she says,
"I study better with music…"
00:44:34.040 --> 00:44:35.319 align:center
- or something like that.
- Yes, sir.
00:44:35.320 --> 00:44:36.239 align:center
That's you, right?
00:44:36.240 --> 00:44:37.679 align:center
- Yes, sir.
- Bro, you have to see that video.
00:44:37.680 --> 00:44:39.399 align:center
- Are you eating something in it?
- It's great.
00:44:39.400 --> 00:44:41.839 align:center
- No, sir, I'm not eating.
- Then how did you see it?
00:44:41.840 --> 00:44:44.079 align:center
No, seriously, it's such a cute video.
00:44:44.080 --> 00:44:45.999 align:center
- I was studying, sir.
- Yeah, very nice.
00:44:46.000 --> 00:44:46.919 align:center
- Really?
- Thank you so much, sir.
00:44:46.920 --> 00:44:48.679 align:center
I've seen that video ten times.
00:44:48.680 --> 00:44:49.759 align:center
- Oh my!
- Oh!
00:44:49.760 --> 00:44:51.679 align:center
- I mean, it's so cute.
- Thank you, sir.
00:44:51.680 --> 00:44:52.720 align:center
Thank you so much.
00:44:53.080 --> 00:44:54.160 align:center
Thank you so much, sir.
00:44:54.960 --> 00:44:55.920 align:center
You've got it…
00:44:58.080 --> 00:44:59.520 align:center
How many views has it got?
00:44:59.920 --> 00:45:01.239 align:center
118 million.
00:45:01.240 --> 00:45:02.320 align:center
Ten among those are his.
00:45:03.800 --> 00:45:06.239 align:center
- What? Are you serious?
- 118!
00:45:06.240 --> 00:45:07.160 align:center
Yes, sir.
00:45:07.640 --> 00:45:10.039 align:center
- You have 118 million views?
- Yes, sir.
00:45:10.040 --> 00:45:12.120 align:center
You should sit here,
and I'll go sit over there.
00:45:12.560 --> 00:45:14.599 align:center
- You go over there, and I'll dance here.
- No, sir…
00:45:14.600 --> 00:45:15.720 align:center
No, no, no.
00:45:18.840 --> 00:45:20.880 align:center
- Damn!
- You sit over there.
00:45:23.360 --> 00:45:25.080 align:center
118 million?!
00:45:25.200 --> 00:45:26.120 align:center
Yes, sir.
00:45:30.400 --> 00:45:31.559 align:center
Dude, I mean--
00:45:31.560 --> 00:45:33.120 align:center
There probably aren't even
that many people in the country.
00:45:35.360 --> 00:45:37.720 align:center
He just said each person
watched it ten times.
00:45:39.960 --> 00:45:43.479 align:center
Genuinely, not even Samay's videos
have as many views
00:45:43.480 --> 00:45:44.840 align:center
as this video of yours.
00:45:45.840 --> 00:45:48.920 align:center
Do any of your videos have
118 million or something?
00:45:49.720 --> 00:45:51.240 align:center
- I don't, man.
- That one--
00:45:51.360 --> 00:45:52.320 align:center
But now they will!
00:45:52.920 --> 00:45:53.920 align:center
I do, I do.
00:45:55.880 --> 00:45:57.840 align:center
- Damn.
- It says here you're a B-boy.
00:45:58.760 --> 00:46:00.879 align:center
No, sir, I was.
00:46:00.880 --> 00:46:02.560 align:center
- You're a girl, right?
- Yes, sir.
00:46:03.280 --> 00:46:04.200 align:center
I'm a girl.
00:46:06.480 --> 00:46:09.719 align:center
"B-boy" means a dancer.
It's a dance term.
00:46:09.720 --> 00:46:11.280 align:center
- I'm so sorry.
- No.
00:46:12.360 --> 00:46:13.360 align:center
It's okay.
00:46:13.600 --> 00:46:16.239 align:center
Last season, we also had someone
from the Northeast.
00:46:16.240 --> 00:46:17.159 align:center
She was so sweet.
00:46:17.160 --> 00:46:19.439 align:center
What is it about your Northeast culture
00:46:19.440 --> 00:46:22.640 align:center
that all the people from there
are so kind, so sweet, so full of joy?
00:46:23.120 --> 00:46:25.239 align:center
Well, we live in the mountains.
00:46:25.240 --> 00:46:27.919 align:center
We always feel fresh, you know,
living away from the chaos.
00:46:27.920 --> 00:46:28.800 align:center
That's amazing.
00:46:29.240 --> 00:46:30.240 align:center
That's why, sir.
00:46:30.560 --> 00:46:32.040 align:center
So, that's fun, sir.
00:46:32.280 --> 00:46:34.840 align:center
You know, our minds are empty.
I mean…
00:46:35.440 --> 00:46:37.600 align:center
Sir, no. Sorry, sir.
00:46:39.400 --> 00:46:42.200 align:center
- I mean, our minds are fresh.
- Your minds are fresh.
00:46:42.320 --> 00:46:44.000 align:center
- Fresh.
- Very nice. Very nice.
00:46:44.720 --> 00:46:48.039 align:center
Man, your way of speaking
is so fun to listen to.
00:46:48.040 --> 00:46:48.920 align:center
You swear?
00:46:49.120 --> 00:46:50.400 align:center
- Thank you.
- Yes, sir.
00:46:51.080 --> 00:46:52.120 align:center
Yes, sir.
00:46:52.560 --> 00:46:55.639 align:center
It says here that if you could
swap lives with someone,
00:46:55.640 --> 00:46:57.360 align:center
it would be Mr. Amitabh Bachchan.
00:46:58.480 --> 00:47:00.720 align:center
Now why is that?
What's this sudden…
00:47:00.840 --> 00:47:01.840 align:center
Yes, sir.
00:47:02.160 --> 00:47:03.160 align:center
"My child!"
00:47:03.920 --> 00:47:05.120 align:center
- "Dignity…"
- Please.
00:47:05.560 --> 00:47:06.800 align:center
- Please. Once.
- "Fire!"
00:47:09.240 --> 00:47:10.920 align:center
So what do you want
to do with Amitabh ji?
00:47:11.040 --> 00:47:12.119 align:center
The legend, Amitabh sir.
00:47:12.120 --> 00:47:13.800 align:center
Because he did something terrible to him.
00:47:19.720 --> 00:47:22.280 align:center
- What do…
- What is it that you want to do?
00:47:23.840 --> 00:47:27.000 align:center
Well, the question was something like,
if for one day--
00:47:27.120 --> 00:47:28.680 align:center
Just for one day, right?
00:47:28.800 --> 00:47:32.320 align:center
If you had to swap lives with someone
for a day, who would it be?
00:47:32.840 --> 00:47:34.799 align:center
That's why I wrote Amitabh Bachchan sir.
00:47:34.800 --> 00:47:38.760 align:center
Because I just want to see
what life looks like from that high up.
00:47:45.120 --> 00:47:46.480 align:center
Brilliant! Very good!
00:47:49.120 --> 00:47:51.400 align:center
- Do you know Harssh bhai?
- Yes, sir.
00:47:51.760 --> 00:47:52.720 align:center
Bharti ji's…
00:47:57.960 --> 00:47:59.640 align:center
And there's no problem with that.
00:48:00.520 --> 00:48:02.360 align:center
Bharti ji's what?
Go on, say the whole thing.
00:48:02.480 --> 00:48:04.960 align:center
- Bharti ji's… liability.
- People are still laughing.
00:48:06.600 --> 00:48:07.640 align:center
Better half.
00:48:08.400 --> 00:48:09.720 align:center
- There you go.
- How sweet!
00:48:10.200 --> 00:48:12.039 align:center
You're a good person.
You shouldn't have come here.
00:48:12.040 --> 00:48:13.320 align:center
The people here are terrible.
00:48:14.320 --> 00:48:16.639 align:center
You're very nice.
When did you get to Mumbai?
00:48:16.640 --> 00:48:17.639 align:center
- Did you come for the show?
- Sir…
00:48:17.640 --> 00:48:19.600 align:center
I arrived for the first time today.
I mean, yesterday.
00:48:19.920 --> 00:48:21.239 align:center
- You've never been to Mumbai before?
- No.
00:48:21.240 --> 00:48:23.440 align:center
- This is your first time in Mumbai?
- Yes, sir.
00:48:23.680 --> 00:48:24.520 align:center
So…
00:48:25.920 --> 00:48:27.720 align:center
- "Yes, sir!"
- So how long will you be here?
00:48:28.040 --> 00:48:28.960 align:center
Until tomorrow.
00:48:29.440 --> 00:48:30.800 align:center
Stay longer.
It's your first time in Mumbai.
00:48:30.920 --> 00:48:33.359 align:center
Sir, I have to go to college.
My attendance is low.
00:48:33.360 --> 00:48:34.440 align:center
Don't worry about it.
00:48:34.640 --> 00:48:36.640 align:center
It's homeopathy anyway. It doesn't…
00:48:39.000 --> 00:48:42.240 align:center
I was dreading that
someone would say that!
00:48:42.840 --> 00:48:43.800 align:center
Geni ji,
00:48:43.920 --> 00:48:45.839 align:center
- Yes, sir.
- why don't you become a real doctor?
00:48:45.840 --> 00:48:47.400 align:center
Even the exam papers
have been leaked now.
00:48:54.880 --> 00:48:57.840 align:center
There was a performance before you.
You didn't see any of it, right?
00:48:58.640 --> 00:49:00.799 align:center
He was cutting a banana
with playing cards.
00:49:00.800 --> 00:49:02.199 align:center
- A banana.
- Yes, sir. Got it.
00:49:02.200 --> 00:49:04.119 align:center
- A banana.
- The fruit you peel and eat.
00:49:04.120 --> 00:49:05.120 align:center
Yes, sir.
00:49:05.280 --> 00:49:06.199 align:center
Yes, yes.
00:49:06.200 --> 00:49:08.479 align:center
He cut it with a card, like this.
00:49:08.480 --> 00:49:10.280 align:center
- Very dangerous.
- With a card? Like this?
00:49:12.160 --> 00:49:13.320 align:center
Like this.
00:49:15.000 --> 00:49:15.880 align:center
Oh.
00:49:16.480 --> 00:49:18.519 align:center
- Do you want to see it?
- Yes, sir.
00:49:18.520 --> 00:49:20.160 align:center
Come on, bring him out!
00:49:24.560 --> 00:49:26.360 align:center
You're our guest today.
00:49:27.480 --> 00:49:30.120 align:center
You came all the way from Arunachal
for us. We'll show you something.
00:49:30.240 --> 00:49:32.000 align:center
- Thank you so much, sir.
- Come on, brother.
00:49:35.960 --> 00:49:37.759 align:center
- Geni ji.
- He has brought vegetables.
00:49:37.760 --> 00:49:39.240 align:center
- Geni ji…
- Damn!
00:49:39.360 --> 00:49:40.680 align:center
Why don't you sit over there for now?
00:49:41.600 --> 00:49:42.919 align:center
- Why not?
- Sit. Please have a seat.
00:49:42.920 --> 00:49:43.999 align:center
- Yeah, why not?
- Sure?
00:49:44.000 --> 00:49:45.080 align:center
- Yeah!
- Yes, yes.
00:49:49.720 --> 00:49:50.600 align:center
Hello.
00:49:52.320 --> 00:49:54.679 align:center
Our sister has come
from Arunachal Pradesh.
00:49:54.680 --> 00:49:56.640 align:center
- So, let's show her a trick.
- Yeah, okay.
00:49:57.200 --> 00:49:58.800 align:center
You have to grip this with your teeth.
00:50:01.320 --> 00:50:02.359 align:center
Bro!
00:50:02.360 --> 00:50:03.840 align:center
No, the card won't hit you.
00:50:04.160 --> 00:50:06.640 align:center
You were holding a match in your hand
earlier. Did any card hit you?
00:50:07.120 --> 00:50:08.039 align:center
You're safe.
00:50:08.040 --> 00:50:09.600 align:center
Geni, I'm doing this just for you.
00:50:14.120 --> 00:50:15.560 align:center
A brother's love!
00:50:18.880 --> 00:50:21.080 align:center
Balraj… Balraj,
does this remind you of anything?
00:50:48.920 --> 00:50:49.960 align:center
How was that?
00:50:56.480 --> 00:50:58.480 align:center
- Tell him.
- Geni, what would you like to say?
00:50:59.080 --> 00:51:01.920 align:center
Excellent. You should have
gone to India's Got Talent.
00:51:03.720 --> 00:51:04.680 align:center
He…
00:51:07.760 --> 00:51:09.639 align:center
- Thank you, man. Thank you so much.
- Thank you.
00:51:09.640 --> 00:51:12.240 align:center
Let's have a big round of applause
for Geni, everyone! Come on!
00:51:12.840 --> 00:51:13.800 align:center
Thank you.
00:51:15.720 --> 00:51:17.399 align:center
- Geni ji…
- Yes, sir.
00:51:17.400 --> 00:51:19.400 align:center
I'll just give you a ten out of ten.
You're so entertaining.
00:51:21.960 --> 00:51:22.999 align:center
Well…
00:51:23.000 --> 00:51:27.040 align:center
I really wish I could give you
more than ten, but it's a ten.
00:51:31.320 --> 00:51:32.160 align:center
Geni ji…
00:51:33.360 --> 00:51:34.200 align:center
ten.
00:51:36.040 --> 00:51:37.720 align:center
Obviously, a ten from my side.
00:51:40.120 --> 00:51:41.360 align:center
- Yes, sir.
- Yes, sir.
00:51:42.160 --> 00:51:43.680 align:center
Ten out of ten from my side.
00:51:47.160 --> 00:51:49.120 align:center
That makes your average ten.
00:51:52.400 --> 00:51:54.959 align:center
Damn it!
00:51:54.960 --> 00:51:57.719 align:center
- No!
- No!
00:51:57.720 --> 00:52:00.040 align:center
No!
00:52:01.240 --> 00:52:02.239 align:center
Come on!
00:52:02.240 --> 00:52:04.319 align:center
Come on, Geni,
you're better than that!
00:52:04.320 --> 00:52:06.359 align:center
Yeah, so you gave me a ten.
00:52:06.360 --> 00:52:07.879 align:center
Everyone gave you a ten.
00:52:07.880 --> 00:52:09.920 align:center
- All of us.
- Yeah, so that's higher than this.
00:52:10.240 --> 00:52:12.000 align:center
- Yeah, but--
- Well, that's great, but…
00:52:12.640 --> 00:52:14.279 align:center
the scores should match.
00:52:14.280 --> 00:52:16.160 align:center
You didn't think
you'd get a ten today?
00:52:16.600 --> 00:52:19.080 align:center
No, this number 7.5 is very aesthetic.
00:52:21.040 --> 00:52:21.960 align:center
It's a great number.
00:52:23.560 --> 00:52:25.160 align:center
- She's so cute.
- Aesthetic number.
00:52:25.760 --> 00:52:26.799 align:center
Aesthetic.
00:52:26.800 --> 00:52:30.200 align:center
Man, I don't want to let you leave
without a gift from us.
00:52:30.320 --> 00:52:34.160 align:center
So, from us, you win
a brand new Ai+ Nova smartphone.
00:52:38.760 --> 00:52:39.839 align:center
It's a phone.
00:52:39.840 --> 00:52:41.599 align:center
- This--
- I'm getting a phone?
00:52:41.600 --> 00:52:42.560 align:center
- Yes!
- Damn!
00:52:43.880 --> 00:52:45.200 align:center
It's a very durable phone.
00:52:45.560 --> 00:52:47.000 align:center
It'll come in handy for self-defense.
00:52:47.120 --> 00:52:49.680 align:center
- Oh, boy!
- If someone starts throwing cards at you,
00:52:50.240 --> 00:52:52.319 align:center
- Oh, boy!
- you can use this to shield yourself.
00:52:52.320 --> 00:52:53.239 align:center
Hello.
00:52:53.240 --> 00:52:54.120 align:center
There you go.
00:52:54.400 --> 00:52:56.240 align:center
- All of it?
- Just one. Just one.
00:52:57.560 --> 00:52:59.000 align:center
Let's go!
00:53:00.840 --> 00:53:01.999 align:center
Thank you so much for joining us.
00:53:02.000 --> 00:53:03.039 align:center
- Thank you so much, sir.
- Take care.
00:53:03.040 --> 00:53:04.199 align:center
- Bye-bye.
- Thank you so much.
00:53:04.200 --> 00:53:05.519 align:center
Bye-bye. Make some noise for her!
00:53:05.520 --> 00:53:07.080 align:center
- Awesome, Geni!
- Well done.
00:53:15.800 --> 00:53:17.760 align:center
Wow! That was so much fun!
00:53:18.080 --> 00:53:19.839 align:center
Man, people are incredibly talented.
00:53:19.840 --> 00:53:21.600 align:center
Once again,
I forgot to mention Wild Stone.
00:53:24.200 --> 00:53:27.360 align:center
Look at Samay's fate
What a tragedy has befallen him
00:53:27.720 --> 00:53:29.640 align:center
He took Latent to the skies
00:53:30.200 --> 00:53:32.200 align:center
Yet lost himself along the way
00:53:32.840 --> 00:53:35.720 align:center
He didn't even say, "Would you rather…"
Yet his show got shut down
00:53:36.320 --> 00:53:38.319 align:center
You've got evil-eye charms on your dress.
00:53:38.320 --> 00:53:41.680 align:center
Do you really think anyone would cast
the evil eye on such crappy poetry?
00:53:42.520 --> 00:53:43.920 align:center
You were doing great.
00:53:44.240 --> 00:53:45.400 align:center
You know what the problem was?
00:53:45.720 --> 00:53:47.920 align:center
Whatever you just did…
wasn't worth a thing.
00:53:50.760 --> 00:53:52.679 align:center
May I recite a verse about heartbreak?
00:53:52.680 --> 00:53:54.279 align:center
- Of course.
- But a good one.
00:53:54.280 --> 00:53:55.199 align:center
- Let's hear it!
- Let's hear it!
00:53:55.200 --> 00:53:56.120 align:center
I present to you…
00:53:57.480 --> 00:53:59.439 align:center
- Had it never begun…
- Wow.
00:53:59.440 --> 00:54:00.520 align:center
Finish what you're eating first.
00:54:02.600 --> 00:54:05.080 align:center
With your mouth full of food,
it came out all weird.
00:54:06.600 --> 00:54:07.520 align:center
No, no.
00:54:08.160 --> 00:54:11.320 align:center
Had it never begun
There'd be no regret
00:54:11.840 --> 00:54:14.960 align:center
Either I'd have had you
Or we'd never have met
00:54:15.120 --> 00:54:16.599 align:center
- Wow!
- Wow!
00:54:16.600 --> 00:54:17.599 align:center
Wow!
00:54:17.600 --> 00:54:21.640 align:center
If you'd watched what you eat
Your stomach wouldn't be so flabby
00:54:24.640 --> 00:54:27.560 align:center
If you weren't a good writer
You never would've won Bharti over
00:54:35.880 --> 00:54:38.040 align:center
On that note, if we could get some tea…
00:54:38.680 --> 00:54:39.880 align:center
There you go!
00:54:41.160 --> 00:54:44.440 align:center
Pallavi ji, it says here that
you were almost kidnapped once.
00:54:44.920 --> 00:54:47.960 align:center
I was with my grandfather and my sister.
The place was very crowded.
00:54:48.240 --> 00:54:50.679 align:center
I was very little, so I wandered off,
and a drunk guy came up to me.
00:54:50.680 --> 00:54:52.640 align:center
He asked, "Want some chocolate?"
I said, "No."
00:54:53.040 --> 00:54:54.359 align:center
Then he came up behind me again
00:54:54.360 --> 00:54:55.719 align:center
and grabbed my hand like this.
00:54:55.720 --> 00:54:58.560 align:center
He was about to cover my mouth
when I kicked him and ran away.
00:54:59.320 --> 00:55:00.320 align:center
Oh, shit.
00:55:00.600 --> 00:55:01.600 align:center
Where did you kick him?
00:55:02.680 --> 00:55:03.840 align:center
Why? Does it still hurt?
00:55:09.120 --> 00:55:10.160 align:center
Good one.
00:55:11.200 --> 00:55:12.839 align:center
So, one plus one and a half is?
00:55:12.840 --> 00:55:13.839 align:center
- Two and a half.
- Two and a half.
00:55:13.840 --> 00:55:14.799 align:center
I'm giving you a 2.5.
00:55:14.800 --> 00:55:16.240 align:center
That's the same "cutting" mindset.
00:55:19.920 --> 00:55:20.800 align:center
Heard that?
00:55:21.560 --> 00:55:22.480 align:center
He loves me.
00:55:34.720 --> 00:55:36.600 align:center
Bro, just tell us when to clap.
00:55:39.240 --> 00:55:40.680 align:center
That's amazing, man!
00:55:41.400 --> 00:55:42.400 align:center
Amazing, bro!
00:55:42.960 --> 00:55:43.800 align:center
Incredible!
00:55:44.760 --> 00:55:45.840 align:center
Too good!
00:55:47.560 --> 00:55:48.720 align:center
- Too good.
- Incredible.
00:55:49.880 --> 00:55:52.200 align:center
- But what on earth was that?
- Man…
00:55:52.320 --> 00:55:54.839 align:center
You claimed no one on this show
has any talent.
00:55:54.840 --> 00:55:56.800 align:center
- No, I was talking about the panel.
- He was talking about the panel.
00:56:08.280 --> 00:56:09.640 align:center
That was a good one.
00:56:11.040 --> 00:56:12.200 align:center
Get me some water, man.
00:56:13.080 --> 00:56:14.440 align:center
Bring some milk as well.
00:56:18.720 --> 00:56:19.600 align:center
Tea…
00:56:20.200 --> 00:56:21.880 align:center
Do you play any instruments?
00:56:22.000 --> 00:56:23.519 align:center
- Me?
- Yeah.
00:56:23.520 --> 00:56:25.280 align:center
I don't see anyone behind you.
00:56:31.000 --> 00:56:31.959 align:center
Jerk.
00:56:31.960 --> 00:56:34.280 align:center
I play a few instruments
pretty well myself.
00:56:34.400 --> 00:56:35.679 align:center
- You play them yourself?
- Yeah.
00:56:35.680 --> 00:56:36.840 align:center
Which one? Kettle?
00:56:39.040 --> 00:56:40.200 align:center
He plays the kettle.
00:56:41.160 --> 00:56:42.280 align:center
So, Yuvan bhai,
00:56:42.920 --> 00:56:45.400 align:center
what happened to you
that you decided to play the violin?
00:56:46.040 --> 00:56:48.799 align:center
Well, basically,
I was born in South Africa.
00:56:48.800 --> 00:56:50.000 align:center
Did I ask you that?
00:56:50.880 --> 00:56:52.319 align:center
- I'm giving you the backstory.
- Okay, go on.
00:56:52.320 --> 00:56:55.680 align:center
Back in South Africa,
my mom told me a story
00:56:56.000 --> 00:56:58.120 align:center
about when I was in her womb.
00:56:58.880 --> 00:57:00.679 align:center
- Okay. Okay.
- Okay.
00:57:00.680 --> 00:57:02.559 align:center
- So, that's where it all began.
- So, I-- Yeah, that's where it began.
00:57:02.560 --> 00:57:04.600 align:center
He was playing the umbilical cord
like a violin.
00:57:16.640 --> 00:57:19.320 align:center
How many pairs of underwear
have you ripped doing that?
00:57:21.120 --> 00:57:22.640 align:center
I ripped my Spider-Man ones.
00:57:22.920 --> 00:57:24.920 align:center
Wait, that came out of you?
00:57:33.160 --> 00:57:34.080 align:center
You know…
00:57:34.800 --> 00:57:37.240 align:center
all the things we think and go,
00:57:37.880 --> 00:57:39.640 align:center
"Let's not address this,"
00:57:40.600 --> 00:57:43.080 align:center
this man blurts out with total confidence.
00:57:50.320 --> 00:57:52.519 align:center
Oh, man! Priyanshu…
00:57:52.520 --> 00:57:54.560 align:center
- So, Priyanshu bhai…
- Yes, sir?
00:57:55.120 --> 00:57:56.800 align:center
do you just hate your body?
00:57:57.600 --> 00:58:00.120 align:center
- You tried your best to break it.
- It's fun, sir.
00:58:00.240 --> 00:58:02.000 align:center
I can do it however I want.
00:58:02.400 --> 00:58:03.400 align:center
I could just lift a leg and do it.
00:58:03.960 --> 00:58:05.200 align:center
- Do what?
- What?
00:58:05.920 --> 00:58:07.840 align:center
Whatever your dirty minds are thinking.
00:58:10.080 --> 00:58:12.680 align:center
We don't have to steer
every conversation in that direction.
00:58:13.680 --> 00:58:14.960 align:center
To the place you find so amusing.
00:58:16.080 --> 00:58:16.920 align:center
Okay?
00:58:17.200 --> 00:58:20.639 align:center
Listen carefully and give a good,
solid answer.
00:58:20.640 --> 00:58:23.000 align:center
The joke you're looking for
will come out on its own.
00:58:23.240 --> 00:58:25.799 align:center
Here, you've written…
something really strange.
00:58:25.800 --> 00:58:29.119 align:center
"If someone pulls my leg,
I spread the other one."
00:58:29.120 --> 00:58:30.519 align:center
Right. Like this.
00:58:30.520 --> 00:58:32.159 align:center
Oh, boy! We didn't even pull your leg.
00:58:32.160 --> 00:58:34.999 align:center
- Bro, I--
- I was just showing how it's done.
00:58:35.000 --> 00:58:37.240 align:center
I told you not to go there.
00:58:38.120 --> 00:58:40.079 align:center
Sir, on this show, we can talk like this.
00:58:40.080 --> 00:58:41.880 align:center
Absolutely not! Who told you that?
00:58:42.760 --> 00:58:43.640 align:center
I…
00:58:44.120 --> 00:58:45.720 align:center
- Don't make me switch to English.
- Sorry.
00:58:47.600 --> 00:58:50.960 align:center
So, Priyanshu ji, when did you
realize you could open up like that?
00:58:53.400 --> 00:58:54.920 align:center
What are you talking about?
The dancing or…
00:58:55.480 --> 00:58:57.000 align:center
Why do you say "uh" before everything?
00:58:58.600 --> 00:59:00.560 align:center
Before you answer,
it's a nice, long "uh…"
00:59:00.840 --> 00:59:01.680 align:center
Why?
00:59:08.240 --> 00:59:10.599 align:center
- I…
- Come on, give proper answers.
00:59:10.600 --> 00:59:14.400 align:center
Well, I started saying "uh"
after my friend started pinching me.
00:59:15.960 --> 00:59:17.440 align:center
Who's pinching you here?
00:59:17.920 --> 00:59:18.999 align:center
You.
00:59:19.000 --> 00:59:19.840 align:center
Listen…
00:59:23.920 --> 00:59:26.440 align:center
I'm sensing some sexual tension
between you two.
00:59:27.280 --> 00:59:29.920 align:center
- Is it just me, or does everyone see it?
- No, no!
00:59:31.800 --> 00:59:33.360 align:center
There is. One hundred percent.
00:59:33.840 --> 00:59:36.360 align:center
Time to go from tea seller to plumber.
00:59:41.480 --> 00:59:43.359 align:center
Kiku sir, are you having fun?
00:59:43.360 --> 00:59:44.599 align:center
I'm having a lot of fun, man.
00:59:44.600 --> 00:59:46.719 align:center
Mind if I move the peri-peri over here?
00:59:46.720 --> 00:59:49.480 align:center
Why stop at moving it there?
You can take it home with you too.
00:59:50.360 --> 00:59:51.399 align:center
You're all about peri-peri,
00:59:51.400 --> 00:59:52.760 align:center
but can't bend down
for a peri-pauna, right?
00:59:55.440 --> 00:59:57.400 align:center
Because his paunch gets in the way.
00:59:57.680 --> 00:59:58.640 align:center
Everything else is…
01:00:00.360 --> 01:00:01.920 align:center
On that note, bring us some tea.