WEBVTT 00:16.190 --> 00:19.632 Hmm. Who wrote this? 00:19.722 --> 00:21.405 Sir, I wrote this. 00:22.392 --> 00:24.695 -So, you wrote this? -Yes, sir. 00:26.173 --> 00:28.226 -Good. Very good. -Thank you, sir. 00:28.316 --> 00:31.073 What thank you? This is rubbish. 00:31.484 --> 00:34.100 If you want to write this garbage, then go to Mumbai and write films. 00:34.190 --> 00:35.658 There is a lot of scope there. 00:36.035 --> 00:37.784 These kinds of people become engineers, 00:37.971 --> 00:40.684 miss deadlines and then make roads with potholes. 00:40.774 --> 00:42.778 And scooters get stuck in those potholes and the dean 00:42.863 --> 00:44.079 will say you are late again. 00:44.865 --> 00:46.281 Idiot. Fix it! 00:48.109 --> 00:49.536 May I come in, sir? 00:50.808 --> 00:52.877 What is going on here? 00:53.291 --> 00:55.959 Who ordered food in the class? 00:57.000 --> 00:59.054 Who is that delivery guy? Whose food is this? 00:59.313 --> 01:02.156 I am a final-year student, sir. Ankit Pandey. 01:02.643 --> 01:06.826 Actually, my attendance was short in practicals, so 01:07.540 --> 01:09.594 I need your signature on this application, sir. 01:09.684 --> 01:11.453 Otherwise, I will be debarred from the examination. 01:14.503 --> 01:18.546 I have never seen you before today. You haven't shown your face. 01:19.940 --> 01:22.946 Sir, how will you remember my face among so many people? 01:23.036 --> 01:24.092 Shut up! 01:24.615 --> 01:28.103 Three boys come here from your class, CV III. 01:28.128 --> 01:30.231 I even remember their Insta handles. 01:30.471 --> 01:33.505 Innocent Devil Aditya, Elon Musquitiyo, 01:33.561 --> 01:35.677 and _KissmyEx. 01:37.930 --> 01:39.357 What were you doing for so many days? 02:07.121 --> 02:09.411 Studies, sir. It's my final year. 02:09.501 --> 02:13.317 Shut up. Don't talk nonsense. I'll tell you what you were doing. 02:13.513 --> 02:15.260 You were partying. 02:15.637 --> 02:18.477 You were watching movies with your girlfriend. 02:19.656 --> 02:23.116 Oh, sorry. You won't have a girlfriend. 02:23.818 --> 02:25.961 The CS guys have girlfriends. Right? 02:27.429 --> 02:29.808 You were spending your father's money. 02:29.898 --> 02:34.576 The money which that hard-working man earned after working overtime, 02:34.666 --> 02:39.322 taking extra classes, costing him his blood and sweat. 02:39.755 --> 02:42.771 Now just like you spent that hard-working man's money, 02:44.296 --> 02:47.453 treat this the same way. Come on. Blow on it. 02:47.647 --> 02:49.463 -No, sir. -Go on. Blow on it. 02:52.383 --> 02:55.885 Oh, it nosedived just like your career. 02:57.313 --> 03:01.723 Sir, if I get debarred, I won't be able to sit for my placements. 03:01.974 --> 03:06.022 So? You are used to sitting idle for three years. 03:06.712 --> 03:08.366 Now, use it. 03:08.593 --> 03:11.174 -Sir, please, one last chance. -Get out. 03:11.264 --> 03:13.241 -Sir, only one... -Get out! 03:17.338 --> 03:21.671 And, you. I will make you dive into this curing tank. Fix the reading. 03:21.761 --> 03:23.340 -Sir, mine is done. -Shut up. 03:24.422 --> 03:25.623 He is done. 03:29.173 --> 03:31.837 You must be thinking that I am the villain of this story. 03:32.549 --> 03:37.268 I am. I have to be. Otherwise, these guys won't behave. 03:38.236 --> 03:41.008 If there were no villains ruling Gotham City, 03:41.650 --> 03:44.623 then Mr Wayne's son would have been indulging in debauchery like them too. 03:45.596 --> 03:48.311 But their fathers don't even have that kind of money. 03:48.704 --> 03:50.212 Still, look at their attitudes. 03:51.196 --> 03:53.693 There is so much cut-throat competition outside. 03:54.472 --> 04:00.060 Kids do so much to get that extra edge. Like internships. 04:00.150 --> 04:03.444 Please, sir, let me intern for your company. I can work for free, sir. 04:03.534 --> 04:06.546 You are my son. I am not going to pay you anyway. 04:06.636 --> 04:08.601 Come to the office tomorrow morning at sharp nine o'clock. 04:08.707 --> 04:10.011 They contest elections. 04:10.085 --> 04:13.347 Jatin, move forward. We are all with you. 04:13.452 --> 04:16.918 Jatin, move forward. We are all with you. 04:16.993 --> 04:19.226 They embarrass themselves in fests. 04:19.432 --> 04:22.585 I can't open my eyes before noon nowadays. 04:22.675 --> 04:26.480 I could only sleep in your lap, mom. 04:28.838 --> 04:30.142 They don't even know ABCD. 04:30.891 --> 04:33.918 But they are well-versed in C++. 04:34.718 --> 04:36.772 And most kids do the thing 04:36.967 --> 04:41.983 that takes the least amount of effort and is the most fun. Wasting time. 04:50.623 --> 04:52.569 And then how quickly the four years of 04:52.644 --> 04:55.011 engineering fly while they are drinking tea, 04:57.367 --> 04:58.848 they barely realize it. 05:03.249 --> 05:04.870 Is the order ready? 05:06.049 --> 05:08.222 You know that I have brought the can. 05:08.312 --> 05:11.552 If you drink black coffee with this, you'll enjoy it more. 05:13.865 --> 05:16.849 Uncle, you have made such bad tea again. 05:16.939 --> 05:18.269 I gave you the recipe just yesterday. 05:18.646 --> 05:20.913 Where do I have the time to read recipes, Jhantoo? 05:21.003 --> 05:25.120 You should have made a reel. Five incredible ways to make tea. 05:25.368 --> 05:28.244 Let me get the stamp of unemployment first. Then I will make reels. 05:28.334 --> 05:30.753 And do you want to improve your business or not? 05:30.843 --> 05:35.024 So, when you boil water, add ginger first and everything else later. 05:35.543 --> 05:38.213 -Make a good cup of tea for me. -Okay. I will try. 05:38.303 --> 05:40.646 People don't know how to make tea here. 05:40.736 --> 05:42.452 -Try this. -A lot of people don't know how to make tea. 05:42.542 --> 05:43.784 It's hot. 05:44.430 --> 05:46.927 Slowly. It's hot. 05:49.104 --> 05:50.271 You are impossible. 05:57.813 --> 06:00.483 Here you go. Go on. 06:00.938 --> 06:02.819 You eat as well. 06:03.187 --> 06:04.841 No. Get away from me. 06:04.931 --> 06:07.889 Eat it. This is what you'll sell after the interview. 06:07.979 --> 06:10.246 You are here again, Miss Sarcasm. 06:10.336 --> 06:11.716 Yes, I am. 06:11.932 --> 06:15.229 Guys, only a few days are left. Where are your CVs? 06:15.319 --> 06:19.284 I made my CV in five different languages and sent it already. 06:19.374 --> 06:23.414 And I even wrote in Python. When the code compiles, it will print on its own. 06:23.504 --> 06:25.544 That one is really cool. You'll see. 06:25.634 --> 06:30.214 My dad has already uploaded my CV on the matrimonial site. I'll send that link. 06:30.304 --> 06:34.182 Really? Then what will the interviewer ask you? How much dowry you'll take? 06:34.292 --> 06:35.557 Shall we discuss it? 06:35.610 --> 06:37.804 The professor isn't allowing me to take the exam. 06:38.107 --> 06:39.739 Upload my CV on the matrimonial site too. 06:39.829 --> 06:43.383 All these tantrums are only so the professors can dominate us. 06:43.473 --> 06:46.248 They'll boss us around, make us cry and then sign. 06:46.497 --> 06:50.930 So, Akku, if you have a good CV, then please send it to me. 06:52.443 --> 06:56.270 Jhantoo, you can't copy. It is very important for the CV to be unique. 06:56.994 --> 07:00.205 Just like people notice a stolen bio with dating profiles, 07:00.295 --> 07:01.491 similarly, the interviewer will notice too. 07:01.581 --> 07:04.237 Well, I have a lot of experience on dating apps. 07:04.810 --> 07:07.618 Tell me, is there any such company coming whose 07:07.681 --> 07:10.528 employee recently left and they are heartbroken? 07:10.618 --> 07:12.496 And their self-esteem is a little low? 07:12.657 --> 07:15.653 Such a vulnerable company will hire me in a jiffy. 07:16.085 --> 07:18.644 Yes, but the problem is if that employee returns 07:18.713 --> 07:21.261 in a week or so, the scoundrels will fire me. 07:22.795 --> 07:26.471 Check this tea now. Is it good? 07:26.708 --> 07:31.208 Wow. Great. But it still has scope for improvement. 07:31.298 --> 07:32.560 -Okay. -Next time. 07:32.650 --> 07:35.141 Listen, order a cold drink for me, please. 07:35.231 --> 07:38.722 No. You just had tea and now you want a cold drink. 07:38.812 --> 07:41.547 -You'll catch a cold and then I'll catch it too. No! -No. 07:42.330 --> 07:43.811 No. 07:43.974 --> 07:46.112 How will you catch a cold if she catches a cold? 07:50.869 --> 07:52.378 How will I catch it? 07:54.937 --> 07:58.739 Close proximity. Seventh-grade science, Akku. Come on. 07:58.829 --> 08:02.275 But Akansha is the one who is in close proximity to her. 08:02.714 --> 08:04.147 So, she is the one who will catch a cold, right? 08:04.974 --> 08:06.073 Detective. 08:08.304 --> 08:11.506 -Akansha will catch it. -Yes, Akansha... 08:12.141 --> 08:15.238 -You keep scolding Jhantoo all the time, right? -Yes. 08:15.328 --> 08:16.513 -Yes, so? -So... 08:17.075 --> 08:19.502 So, the particles of your saliva will fall on Jhantoo. 08:19.592 --> 08:21.520 Yes, they will fall on Jhantoo. 08:21.610 --> 08:25.481 -And Ankit is in close proximity to Jhantoo. -Ankit. 08:25.579 --> 08:29.040 -And Ankit... -In Ankit's close radius is Jaat... 08:29.122 --> 08:32.650 -Jaat. -Yes, and I am the one who hangs out with Jaat. 08:32.740 --> 08:34.198 -Complete circle. -So, I am the one who'll catch it. 08:34.288 --> 08:36.655 -Like this. -This is how a virus works. 08:36.745 --> 08:39.785 It's basic. They teach this in the sixth grade. Come on, Akku. 08:39.875 --> 08:41.860 -How are we close? -They teach that in sixth grade. 08:41.950 --> 08:43.933 Did you guys get high this morning? 08:44.023 --> 08:45.977 -No, no, Chirag. -No. 08:46.073 --> 08:48.223 -Come. Let's get a cold drink. -Yes. 08:48.307 --> 08:50.922 -This is what happens when you read too much. -It's basic, guys. 08:51.012 --> 08:52.500 Get me a samosa. 08:54.100 --> 08:55.959 -One shouldn't study so much. -Yes. 08:56.049 --> 08:58.585 This is getting too difficult. Shall we tell them the truth? 08:58.675 --> 09:00.653 What should we tell them? That we have been dating for two months 09:00.739 --> 09:03.121 but we didn't tell our friends because they'll tease us? 09:03.756 --> 09:07.864 Terrifying. But we'll have to do something, right? 09:10.098 --> 09:11.394 What should we do? 09:13.319 --> 09:18.433 What if our love story began just now, 09:19.490 --> 09:21.111 not two months ago? 09:22.127 --> 09:23.898 -Yes. -Yes. 09:24.298 --> 09:29.708 We can do this. Let's create a fake love story for our real love story. 09:29.798 --> 09:31.154 -This sounds right. -Yeah. 09:31.267 --> 09:34.019 -My wisdom is rubbing off on you. What will you have? -Shut up. 09:34.109 --> 09:35.921 Experience will be covered by the internship. 09:35.981 --> 09:38.451 So, that's done. What's left are achievements and skills. 09:38.548 --> 09:41.336 So, just write whatever random things you have done in college. 09:41.419 --> 09:43.910 Write down whatever you have done as J Shah. 09:44.258 --> 09:48.387 Jaat, some kids from the batch took your help to make a car, right? 09:48.856 --> 09:50.483 Yes, I stole some petrol and gave it to them. 09:50.573 --> 09:52.241 -Perfect. Write that. -Petrol? 09:52.573 --> 09:54.328 Mention that as your experience. 09:54.767 --> 09:57.197 Okay? And, Ankit, you... 09:57.629 --> 10:00.993 -I have done things too... -Yes, but... 10:01.083 --> 10:04.911 I... No, I can't mention that. 10:10.918 --> 10:16.756 Actually, I have done a lot of things in the past four years. 10:17.120 --> 10:22.030 So, I will accumulate it and send it. 10:22.120 --> 10:25.363 I will make my CV. 10:28.877 --> 10:31.107 Yes, and use your certificates. 10:31.837 --> 10:34.323 Yes, I will do that. 10:47.444 --> 10:50.039 'Hostel Daze.' 10:50.116 --> 10:52.604 'Hostel Daze.' 10:56.539 --> 10:59.080 What should I write as my career objective in my CV? 10:59.422 --> 11:01.779 Just write the reason you are doing engineering. 11:03.512 --> 11:05.692 Write that you are fulfilling your parent's dream. 11:05.782 --> 11:06.791 What? 11:09.090 --> 11:11.036 -Should I write that too? -Hey, don't copy me. 11:11.126 --> 11:13.077 -Don't copy it. -I'll be right back. 11:56.579 --> 12:00.430 Reaching new heights in career by scaling peaks 12:00.520 --> 12:04.257 of achievements to attain higher altitude in industry. 12:04.347 --> 12:07.304 You asshole, are you a mountaineer? 12:07.863 --> 12:11.175 It seems like you are going to climb Mount Everest. Cool. Show me more. 12:11.426 --> 12:13.579 Your CV says you went to IIT Bombay. 12:13.873 --> 12:15.628 Yes, I did. To meet my sister. 12:15.811 --> 12:17.065 Deduct rupees fifty for this. 12:17.155 --> 12:19.318 You have written here that you installed a solar power 12:19.371 --> 12:21.813 clothes dryer in the hostel premises. When did you do that? 12:21.903 --> 12:24.309 Who put the clothesline outside to dry clothes? 12:26.426 --> 12:31.977 Look, guys, just as our relatives praise their kids in front of our moms, 12:32.067 --> 12:35.382 highlight your achievements in the same way. 12:35.472 --> 12:37.771 And no one will write under achievements that 12:37.844 --> 12:40.679 they wooed their senior. I am talking to you. 12:40.769 --> 12:45.381 Yes, brother, greetings. I called because you said you'll send me the CV. 12:45.975 --> 12:50.381 No, no. I won't copy it. I will merely refer to it. Yes. 12:50.706 --> 12:53.882 No, no. I am not overconfident at all. I am fully prepared. 12:53.972 --> 12:56.679 Yes, yes. You'll send the CV, right? 12:57.422 --> 12:59.909 Yes, yes, please send it. Thank you, brother. 12:59.999 --> 13:01.247 We got the CV. Come on. 13:18.198 --> 13:19.729 -Chirag. -Yes? 13:20.499 --> 13:22.471 -Chirag. -Who is it? 13:22.808 --> 13:25.132 -It's me, Ankit. -Yes, I am coming. 13:29.771 --> 13:33.414 -What? -Help me make my CV. 13:33.771 --> 13:36.311 Come later. I have an online yoga class going on. 13:36.401 --> 13:39.565 Just tell me what to write under the strength section. 13:39.655 --> 13:41.587 Just write something interesting. 13:42.581 --> 13:44.970 Write about your problem-solving skills. 13:45.060 --> 13:47.814 Adaptive and flexible by nature. 13:47.904 --> 13:50.139 Eye for detail. Write things like that. 13:50.229 --> 13:52.301 -And what about... -Now come later. 13:52.712 --> 13:55.036 -My teacher is waiting. -Can you just... 14:00.329 --> 14:04.693 It's D for detail, not I for detail. Asshole. 14:04.985 --> 14:09.331 So, what does this mean? That if you don't want to drown in shallow water, 14:09.559 --> 14:12.484 you must go on this boat because it has concrete along with what? 14:12.574 --> 14:14.520 -Admixtures. -Good. 14:15.059 --> 14:17.034 It seems you will pass this year. 14:17.199 --> 14:20.097 Everyone, write down admixtures. Do you know how to spell it? 14:20.187 --> 14:21.521 May I come in, sir? 14:22.659 --> 14:23.761 Come. 14:27.003 --> 14:29.273 I have already refused you, haven't I? 14:29.803 --> 14:32.030 Sir, please. Sir, accept this. 14:32.462 --> 14:34.516 If I can't appear for my exams, I'll fail, sir. 14:34.606 --> 14:38.463 Son, you have already failed in life. 14:39.689 --> 14:41.879 Go. Prepare for next year. Go. 14:41.969 --> 14:45.689 Sir, it's just a signature. It's a small thing. 14:46.108 --> 14:49.067 It's just a small thing, is it? 14:49.742 --> 14:52.797 Alright. So, you guys, decide now. 14:52.887 --> 14:56.608 Either he will stay in this class or me. It's just a small thing. 15:03.963 --> 15:05.717 -Okay. -Let's go. 15:08.698 --> 15:11.098 Hey! Come back! 15:12.392 --> 15:13.617 Idiots. 15:14.736 --> 15:16.708 I knew you guys will do this. 15:17.519 --> 15:18.938 I am not going anywhere. 15:19.772 --> 15:24.871 And if he doesn't leave this class now, you will all be marked absent. 15:25.183 --> 15:26.372 Now, you decide. 15:26.462 --> 15:29.034 -Please go, man. -Please go. 15:29.124 --> 15:31.574 -We need attendance. -Just go, man. 15:34.438 --> 15:36.765 Write it down. Admixtures. 15:44.357 --> 15:46.830 We'll get the doctor's certificate next time. 15:47.405 --> 15:48.765 Everyone does it. 15:49.292 --> 15:51.826 Then this scoundrel will sign as well as show sympathy. 15:51.916 --> 15:53.530 Sympathy? Him? 15:54.091 --> 15:56.858 He must have scolded his newborn baby too for attendance. 15:56.948 --> 16:00.294 Baby, I am seeing your face for the first time. 16:00.384 --> 16:03.667 Who takes this long? Go. Try in your next life. 16:06.573 --> 16:09.326 He shouts in front of the first-year students. 16:11.202 --> 16:12.404 They must be thinking that I am a loser. 16:12.604 --> 16:15.037 No, the first-year students respect us. 16:15.127 --> 16:17.604 What respect? Look, how they were staring. 16:17.694 --> 16:19.749 Good morning, brother. Good morning. 16:20.493 --> 16:22.520 Brother, I need your help. 16:23.331 --> 16:26.608 -Regarding what? -I want your fluid mechanics notes. 16:30.717 --> 16:32.364 Are you sure you want my notes? 16:32.454 --> 16:34.094 Yes, brother. Since you are in the fourth year, 16:34.180 --> 16:36.481 it will be helpful for me. Please give them to me. 16:37.182 --> 16:39.667 Okay. I'll mail them to you. 16:39.757 --> 16:43.074 Who reads emails? Do one thing. 16:43.643 --> 16:45.395 Put them on this. 16:48.091 --> 16:51.672 It's a two-MB file. Do one thing. Keep this. 16:51.762 --> 16:55.236 Text me your id. I'll mail it to you. Okay? Go now. 16:57.044 --> 16:58.063 Go. 17:00.962 --> 17:04.615 -You are respected in the department. -A few of them do respect me. 17:04.700 --> 17:06.643 Take advantage of him. Talk to him. 17:07.048 --> 17:08.934 -Should I go back? -He is coming. 17:09.024 --> 17:10.458 -Brother. -Tell me. 17:11.663 --> 17:13.893 You want my number, right? Take it. 17:13.983 --> 17:15.717 No, no, I have your number. 17:15.911 --> 17:18.238 I was saying that if you could transfer your 17:18.864 --> 17:21.556 exclusive collection to this along with the notes. 17:24.890 --> 17:25.978 Which collection? 17:26.042 --> 17:29.316 The one that is only seen by your close circle. 17:29.789 --> 17:31.951 We have already seen the other one a couple of times. 17:35.482 --> 17:38.793 -Come here. -Yes, brother. 17:39.485 --> 17:41.546 -You asshole. -What happened, brother? 17:41.636 --> 17:43.944 -Am I an idiot? -No, no. 17:45.398 --> 17:47.924 Do one thing. Tell me your room number. 17:48.014 --> 17:50.458 -No, brother, I won't tell you. No! -Tell me your room number. 17:50.548 --> 17:51.880 E 33. 17:52.880 --> 17:55.033 E 33. 17:55.712 --> 17:57.688 Alien sex. 17:58.072 --> 18:00.609 -Armpit porn. -Which porn? 18:00.933 --> 18:04.198 -Armpit. -Armpit porn? Show me your armpit. 18:04.879 --> 18:07.193 What's this? Hairy men. 18:07.283 --> 18:10.220 -This is cool. He is fashionable. -Look at his choice. 18:12.014 --> 18:13.862 What were you doing last night at nine? 18:13.952 --> 18:15.743 I wasn't doing anything. 18:15.927 --> 18:18.911 -My best friend's girlfriend? -No, that opened by mistake. 18:19.001 --> 18:20.413 -Should I tell your best friend? -No, no. 18:20.503 --> 18:22.121 Hey. 18:23.753 --> 18:26.899 You asshole, stay within your limit. Okay? 18:26.989 --> 18:28.813 Yes, brother, I was saying that... 18:28.903 --> 18:31.408 What? Get out of here, asshole. 18:31.970 --> 18:33.614 -Brother, my hard disk. -You won't get it back. 18:33.704 --> 18:35.441 Sir, the guys from my wing contributed to buy it. They will thrash me badly. 18:35.531 --> 18:40.078 I will smash it so hard that its F drive and your sex drive will both be deleted. 18:40.184 --> 18:42.331 Get out of here. Run, asshole. 18:43.378 --> 18:44.726 I will punch you, asshole. 18:49.050 --> 18:51.223 -Did you see that? -Yes, bro, I saw it. 18:51.439 --> 18:53.244 They all think that I am a loser. 18:54.185 --> 18:56.672 You can laugh. Yes, keep laughing. 19:01.990 --> 19:05.525 The professor was right. What did he say wrong? 19:06.801 --> 19:09.439 What have I accomplished in the past three years? 19:11.157 --> 19:15.784 That is why I am not able to write a single page. 19:16.249 --> 19:17.774 Not a single page in my CV. 19:17.864 --> 19:19.958 Let it be, bro. 19:20.800 --> 19:22.736 We'll do something about that. 19:22.826 --> 19:25.957 -Evil spirit, get out of my friend's body. -What are you doing? 19:26.047 --> 19:28.020 I will drive this evil spirit out of your body today. 19:28.110 --> 19:30.877 -There is no evil spirit. -Yes, there is. 19:31.310 --> 19:34.705 You were absolutely normal till 21 years of age. Now, you want a girl too. 19:35.310 --> 19:38.337 Oh, Jaat, my brother. 19:38.427 --> 19:41.105 Not a girl, a gf. Yes. 19:41.515 --> 19:43.850 And it's normal nowadays. 19:44.423 --> 19:49.406 Look, only the chosen ones have girlfriends in engineering life. 19:49.828 --> 19:52.640 Don't you want us to be the chosen ones too? 19:53.883 --> 19:58.986 Last year, I could proudly say that at least three out of us four are safe. 20:00.035 --> 20:01.873 But this year, you lost your armour too. 20:05.169 --> 20:08.391 Now, tell me this, are you yet to choose a girl? 20:08.481 --> 20:11.007 -Or have you done that too without me? -No! 20:11.742 --> 20:13.115 That remains to be done. 20:13.205 --> 20:15.763 Who will you do it with? Someone from our group? 20:16.076 --> 20:18.303 Yes. Who would I date though? 20:18.865 --> 20:20.584 I mean, in our group. 20:21.546 --> 20:25.017 Ankit is your ex and I am over him. 20:26.508 --> 20:29.287 -Jaat. -Oh, he likes boys. 20:29.377 --> 20:33.168 Yes, so, who else is there? 20:33.394 --> 20:34.973 Jhantoo? 20:39.339 --> 20:43.318 -The only one left is Chirag. -What do you think about him? 20:43.544 --> 20:44.787 Hmm. 20:47.177 --> 20:49.674 Nabomita? She is the one you like? 20:49.764 --> 20:51.977 Yes, no. I mean 20:52.312 --> 20:57.544 I don't like her but I can try to like her. 20:57.739 --> 21:02.063 You can try to woo me too. But it's not like I will be wooed easily. 21:04.226 --> 21:05.596 Do one thing. 21:05.900 --> 21:07.631 Buy a bunch of roses. 21:08.046 --> 21:10.200 And buy a can of kerosene oil. 21:10.290 --> 21:13.120 As soon as the girl says no to you, light yourself on fire. 21:13.210 --> 21:14.464 Hey, no. 21:14.645 --> 21:16.427 -Yes, he is cute. -Right? 21:17.828 --> 21:20.578 -But... -But? 21:21.062 --> 21:23.078 -Nothing. -Tell me. 21:23.502 --> 21:25.630 Isn't her laugh a bit weird? 21:25.720 --> 21:27.256 Don't you find him a little immature? 21:29.816 --> 21:31.135 Immature? 21:31.393 --> 21:35.274 -Laugh? -Yes. Pay attention to it. 21:36.586 --> 21:38.455 I have never noticed that. 21:38.607 --> 21:42.212 Look, why will any mature guy be friends with Jaat and Jhantoo? 21:42.302 --> 21:45.263 Anyone seems mature compared to them, just like I seem thin compared to you. 21:45.595 --> 21:47.249 -What? -Nothing. 21:49.948 --> 21:54.803 Chirag, I am wiser than you. That is why I am saying this to you. 21:55.936 --> 21:58.269 People turn blind in love. 22:13.447 --> 22:17.109 Should I write Resume or Curriculum Vitae? 22:17.199 --> 22:20.896 You were making your CV, right? So, just write that. You got distracted again. 22:21.095 --> 22:24.226 I got distracted the day I chose to study engineering. 22:24.613 --> 22:30.194 But anyway, now it's time to recentre your navigation, Ankit Pandey. 22:30.284 --> 22:33.640 The problem is that you are very common. 22:33.730 --> 22:36.668 You merely have the person in your personality. 22:36.758 --> 22:39.492 You don't know the first thing about being an alpha. 22:39.582 --> 22:43.532 I mean you are so average that when people see you, they start asking, 22:43.802 --> 22:45.351 how much average does he give? 22:45.992 --> 22:48.288 -When your parents had sex for the first time... -Enough, brother. 22:48.378 --> 22:50.410 Yes, I went on the wrong tangent. 22:50.500 --> 22:55.005 So, I mean to say that if the CV is average, the job will be average. 22:55.907 --> 22:57.707 That means the CV should be unique. 22:58.507 --> 23:02.193 Whether it is the bedroom or the office, fake it till you make it. 23:03.848 --> 23:07.956 Here, this has the CVs of the toppers from the last ten years. 23:08.046 --> 23:10.321 Steal some tiny bits from all the CVs. 23:10.683 --> 23:13.332 This is cool. Thanks, dude. 23:16.834 --> 23:18.736 -Have you kissed? -Yes. 23:18.826 --> 23:22.120 Then write, proficient in French. 23:24.066 --> 23:28.782 Write all the courses. CAT, STAT, drafting, rendering. 23:28.963 --> 23:31.238 I haven't done these. I'll get caught. 23:31.328 --> 23:33.135 You'll get caught if they see it. 23:33.225 --> 23:35.111 What do you think? The high-paying employees 23:35.183 --> 23:37.794 of multinational companies will sit and read Ankit Pandey's CV? 23:38.108 --> 23:41.232 All the keywords of all the CVs are screened through software. 23:41.322 --> 23:43.632 If you change the font colour to white, 23:43.722 --> 23:46.216 your CV will not only get selected, you won't get caught too. 23:48.538 --> 23:49.684 That's amazing. 23:57.868 --> 23:58.926 Thank you. 24:03.209 --> 24:07.188 Look, no matter how great the man of the match performs in the match, 24:07.376 --> 24:09.753 he is always judged by the quality of his English. 24:09.843 --> 24:12.729 So whatever your special achievement in this hostel is, 24:13.005 --> 24:14.958 write that down in pure English. 24:18.833 --> 24:20.109 Curator. 24:21.778 --> 24:24.119 Connoisseur of rare films 24:24.209 --> 24:26.201 of the aphrodisiac category. 24:27.009 --> 24:29.210 -Is that what they call porn? -That must be it. 24:32.891 --> 24:34.518 Now, this is interesting. 24:35.166 --> 24:36.885 This is what you should have filtered. 24:37.264 --> 24:39.512 Send this to Akansha. You'll get a job. 24:39.602 --> 24:42.529 And listen. Give a cup of this to that tea guy. 24:42.842 --> 24:44.529 He had one job. 24:44.799 --> 24:49.242 Forget about the job. First, I should get to write my exams. 24:49.675 --> 24:52.485 I can't understand how to get that old man's signature on the application. 24:52.575 --> 24:55.448 Here is the doctor's certificate. 24:56.064 --> 24:59.350 And listen. It was a human physician so he charged an extra hundred bucks. 24:59.697 --> 25:02.497 Jhantoo, my brother, thank you so much. 25:02.799 --> 25:05.231 What would become of me if it wasn't for you? 25:05.707 --> 25:08.517 I was in a huge existential crisis for the past few days... 25:08.874 --> 25:12.625 -It cost me an extra hundred bucks. -Yes, sorry. 25:12.715 --> 25:14.593 You are the best, Jhantoo. 25:32.064 --> 25:33.729 -Listen. -Yes? 25:33.819 --> 25:36.512 You listed photography as your interest 25:36.602 --> 25:39.197 -but your focus is always off. -Hmm? 25:39.859 --> 25:43.413 Focus. Your focus is always off. 25:43.503 --> 25:45.814 You also wrote you are adventurous. 25:46.172 --> 25:48.602 You can't even have panipuri that is slightly more than medium spicy. 25:48.692 --> 25:51.470 At least I don't eat sweet ginger powder like Jaat. 25:52.172 --> 25:54.377 Okay. Check the work experience, please. 25:59.097 --> 26:02.300 Chirag? Why are you drinking through the straw? Are you a kid? 26:06.224 --> 26:07.739 You have a problem with everything. 26:21.235 --> 26:23.829 What is so funny about this? 26:23.919 --> 26:25.559 Look at your face. 26:26.024 --> 26:27.397 Grow up, Chirag. 26:27.487 --> 26:29.960 -Oh, hello. I have grown up. -You have it on your spectacles too. 26:30.284 --> 26:33.430 And anyway, people stop growing after eighteen. Got it? 26:34.262 --> 26:36.684 She doesn't know anything and she is asking me to grow up. 26:38.284 --> 26:41.182 All the fonts are wrong. These fonts are all different. 26:42.066 --> 26:43.836 So many spelling mistakes too. 27:33.336 --> 27:34.850 Hey, get out of here. 27:35.378 --> 27:37.091 Bro, why do you keep us engaged in all this? 27:37.181 --> 27:39.007 -He is distracting us. -We came here to become engineers. 27:39.097 --> 27:41.337 We didn't come here to become artists. Artists don't get jobs. 27:41.427 --> 27:42.721 So, Akku, how are you doing? 27:43.015 --> 27:44.831 Ankit, what kind of music do you listen to? 27:45.798 --> 27:47.964 -What? -Such questions are asked 27:48.070 --> 27:50.194 before the relationship, not after... 27:51.239 --> 27:53.271 What kind of music do you listen to? 27:55.649 --> 27:58.547 -Rock. -When and where did rock start? 27:59.428 --> 28:02.127 How would I know? Ask the Rock or the Undertaker. 28:03.614 --> 28:07.644 Rock music started in the 1940s in the US after the Great Depression. 28:08.526 --> 28:10.611 I don't even listen to rock and yet, I know. 28:12.046 --> 28:14.814 What nonsense have you written in your CV? 28:15.739 --> 28:17.498 Under career objective, you have written 28:17.578 --> 28:19.392 that a piece of paper can't decide my future. 28:19.482 --> 28:21.792 Under interests, you mentioned a 15 percent education loan? 28:22.293 --> 28:25.086 And you have written Shakespearean English. Behold I liketh surfing. 28:25.302 --> 28:27.655 Clearly, this CV is fake. 28:28.027 --> 28:29.472 If I can find flaws in this, 28:29.538 --> 28:32.386 the guy who has taken 500 interviews will definitely reject this. 28:33.190 --> 28:36.053 You are fooling yourself to fool him. 28:36.469 --> 28:39.106 Fine. Let them reject me. Okay? 28:39.391 --> 28:40.792 I don't have an option. 28:42.254 --> 28:43.707 You have an option. 28:44.874 --> 28:48.151 You are a fresher. No one is expecting much from you. 28:48.567 --> 28:51.810 Just be honest in your CV. Be yourself. 28:52.346 --> 28:56.012 Look, Akku, I know what I am doing. Okay? 28:56.782 --> 28:58.374 Haven't you heard that saying? 28:59.105 --> 29:00.736 Fake it till you make it. 29:13.999 --> 29:17.620 Brother, Bhojpuri music must have originated in Bihar. 29:18.073 --> 29:21.168 Write that too. And also wrote that you play this single drum. 29:21.265 --> 29:23.013 It is called an instrument. 29:23.103 --> 29:26.330 Okay. Come. Let's give your medical certificate to your professor. 29:26.420 --> 29:29.208 Yes. I won't spare that scoundrel today. 29:29.298 --> 29:31.708 My God, Chirag, you are so immature. 29:31.798 --> 29:34.248 You should get admission to a school after you pass out from college. 29:34.338 --> 29:38.281 Oh, hello. When was I being immature? Don't talk nonsense. 29:38.371 --> 29:40.425 You should get admitted to a school. 29:40.515 --> 29:42.453 She has never seen herself laugh. 29:42.785 --> 29:44.093 What about my laugh? 29:44.183 --> 29:45.889 -Tell me. -You should know. You laugh every day. 29:46.224 --> 29:47.400 -Laugh. -Tell me. 29:47.490 --> 29:49.773 What should I tell you? Laugh and see. 29:50.631 --> 29:52.700 No, no. You are not laughing now like you usually do. 29:52.790 --> 29:54.208 Laugh as you laugh. 29:54.298 --> 29:56.775 Okay. So, you make me laugh. Go on. 29:56.865 --> 29:59.694 -Why should I make you laugh? You laugh. -Tell me a joke, Make me laugh. 29:59.985 --> 30:01.098 -I should make you laugh? -Make me laugh. 30:01.188 --> 30:04.239 Okay. I will make you laugh so much that all your oxytocin will be released. 30:04.329 --> 30:05.844 -By tickling you. -No! 30:07.218 --> 30:09.564 See! That loop! 30:10.753 --> 30:12.212 See, this childishness. 30:29.899 --> 30:32.818 I get it now. Funny. 30:33.736 --> 30:36.083 -Me? -No. 30:41.456 --> 30:45.110 The things that other people find problematic about us, 30:46.644 --> 30:48.796 we didn't even notice those things before this. 30:49.844 --> 30:51.061 Yes. 30:51.703 --> 30:55.660 And when we started taking what they said seriously, 30:56.438 --> 30:58.265 we started having problems. 31:05.044 --> 31:09.401 I think those guys are not ready to hear about us. 31:09.630 --> 31:12.938 -Yes. Because we are ready to tell them. -Yes. 31:13.508 --> 31:15.638 -And we are not scared. -Who is sacred? 31:15.728 --> 31:17.627 -Are you scared? -Never. 31:18.459 --> 31:20.784 -We are not avoiding this topic. -Not at all. 31:20.874 --> 31:22.935 -Look at this. -Yes, show me. 31:23.025 --> 31:25.778 It doesn't look good. 31:27.434 --> 31:28.491 Fonts? 31:29.950 --> 31:31.475 May I come in, sir? 31:33.338 --> 31:34.458 Yes. 31:38.156 --> 31:43.968 Sir, actually, I was slightly unwell. 31:44.400 --> 31:46.603 That is why I couldn't attend a few classes. 31:47.042 --> 31:50.668 Let me guess. You must be suffering from dementia? 31:51.134 --> 31:54.377 Otherwise, you would have remembered that I have already refused twice. 31:54.467 --> 31:57.565 Sir, I had jaundice. 31:58.084 --> 31:59.275 Certificate. 32:00.821 --> 32:05.684 Sir, my whole body had turned yellow. I was burning with a fever. 32:05.900 --> 32:09.619 Cholera. Jaundice is a very deadly disease. You must be knowing about it. 32:10.010 --> 32:12.962 All my friends had come to take care of me. I said no. 32:13.332 --> 32:16.007 Go and attend your classes. They are important. 32:16.697 --> 32:19.224 That got full attendance because of that, sir. 32:19.314 --> 32:20.832 But I couldn't. 32:29.029 --> 32:33.180 Ankit, I have been teaching for 20 years. 32:34.616 --> 32:36.492 I can easily catch lies. 32:37.876 --> 32:39.191 Here. 32:39.536 --> 32:42.693 These guys too got fake certificates made like you. 32:43.419 --> 32:46.239 And some of them even got these made by veterinarians. 32:50.361 --> 32:53.459 Your father worked very hard 32:53.549 --> 32:56.618 to save money and send it to you. 32:57.577 --> 33:00.550 He must have walked from home to his office every day. 33:00.878 --> 33:03.092 His feet must be hurting even now. 33:07.930 --> 33:11.779 You are not fooling us. You are fooling yourself. 33:13.673 --> 33:17.028 I don't know if I feel worse for myself or your dad. 33:18.672 --> 33:21.543 Because I just have a student like you. 33:22.745 --> 33:25.565 But he has a son like you. 33:28.298 --> 33:31.360 If you are not studying, at least have some shame. 33:34.118 --> 33:36.989 Go. Prepare for next year. 33:40.302 --> 33:41.772 Sorry, sir. 33:58.479 --> 34:00.799 Sir, what you said is right. 34:03.384 --> 34:04.698 I wasted three years. 34:08.288 --> 34:09.321 What should I have done? 34:10.314 --> 34:13.342 The school pressure since childhood, then the college pressure. 34:13.654 --> 34:15.876 When I would get home, both school and college pressure. 34:17.305 --> 34:20.198 After coming to this hostel, for the first time in my entire life, 34:20.290 --> 34:21.724 I felt free. 34:22.891 --> 34:24.151 I started feeling good. 34:24.749 --> 34:28.148 I enjoyed it a lot. I kept at it. I didn't stop. 34:28.529 --> 34:30.293 I wasted all my time, sir. 34:31.054 --> 34:36.224 It's easy, right? When you get power without responsibility, you misuse it. 34:37.729 --> 34:39.024 I did that too. 34:40.661 --> 34:43.359 But, sir, I will use it from now on. 34:44.345 --> 34:47.787 There will be no slacking in my attendance and hard work now. Promise. 34:48.634 --> 34:51.748 Please, sir, let me write my exams. Otherwise, I will get debarred. 34:52.465 --> 34:56.859 And if I get debarred this time, I will get very derailed, sir. 35:03.535 --> 35:04.658 You speak well. 35:07.721 --> 35:13.464 I am signing to find out whether you are telling the truth or not. 35:21.406 --> 35:22.513 Let's see. 35:26.746 --> 35:28.229 Thank you, sir. 35:37.636 --> 35:42.166 I told you, right? I have to be negative to make them behave. 35:43.874 --> 35:46.080 But he is only behaving for now. 35:47.042 --> 35:48.836 Because a dog's tail 35:48.926 --> 35:52.923 and a building constructed without a soil sample are always crooked. 35:55.939 --> 35:59.798 When he gets a job, he will waste time again. 36:00.274 --> 36:02.220 The girlfriend shenanigans. 36:02.576 --> 36:04.997 He won't even call his parents. 36:09.420 --> 36:11.723 Hello. Yes, dad? 36:13.485 --> 36:15.852 It's just been a week since we... 36:16.405 --> 36:17.734 I was about to call you. 36:28.188 --> 36:29.724 Hey. 36:34.775 --> 36:37.220 Sorry about that day, sir. I won't do it again. 36:37.531 --> 36:39.680 Please don't tell anyone my secret. 36:40.777 --> 36:43.139 There are no secrets. 36:43.870 --> 36:45.500 Everyone has their kinks. 36:45.923 --> 36:49.566 Don't fear it. Accept it. 36:53.232 --> 36:58.237 Take this. Next time, ask directly. Don't make excuses to get an assignment. 36:58.907 --> 37:00.745 -Okay. -I won't give you the collection even then. 37:01.373 --> 37:04.616 But at least I won't screw your happiness. Okay? 37:04.865 --> 37:06.876 -Yes. -Focus on your studies. 37:07.470 --> 37:08.951 -Thank you. -Go on. studies.