WEBVTT

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Hello?

00:00:06.923 --> 00:00:08.529 align:center
No, she's sleeping.

00:00:08.743 --> 00:00:10.515 align:center
Okay, should I start? Okay, I'm doing.

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"93.5 Red FM. Keep on playing."

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"Keep on playing..."

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'Greetings.
You are listening to Radio Sky 94.6 FM.'

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'We have MC Chingari
live in the radio station,'

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'who will take the calls of her fans.'

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'And this is our first caller.
Yes sir, your name?'

00:00:32.915 --> 00:00:36.045 align:center
I'm Ankit speaking from Natti college.

00:00:36.415 --> 00:00:39.655 align:center
'I want to dedicate a song to Akanksha.'

00:00:39.815 --> 00:00:42.695 align:center
'And do you want to
give Akanksha any message?'

00:00:43.145 --> 00:00:45.535 align:center
'Yes, tell her to please pick up my call.'

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'One minute,
why isn't she picking up your call?'

00:00:48.245 --> 00:00:50.135 align:center
'Actually, we had a fight.'

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'A gutter bug like you,'

00:00:51.965 --> 00:00:54.895 align:center
'who trouble girls,
we have a song for them.'

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'I'll play that.'

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"Stop chasing me, creepy."

00:00:59.047 --> 00:01:01.637 align:center
Here, your problem is solved.

00:01:02.592 --> 00:01:03.662 align:center
Let's go.

00:01:03.752 --> 00:01:06.532 align:center
And listen,
stop eating porridge of hostel mess.

00:01:07.242 --> 00:01:08.262 align:center
And you tell me,

00:01:08.862 --> 00:01:11.532 align:center
why did you want that radio 92's number?

00:01:12.072 --> 00:01:15.232 align:center
I wanted for sponsors.

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Then it's okay. If you did
that cringe things for girlfriends,

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like dedicating a song,
I will kick you out of the room.

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Are you mad?
I won't do anything like that.

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What is this music playing?

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Jhaatu.

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What is this going on?

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What the fuck?

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What? Haven't you
seen a clean room before?

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And keep your shoes
outside from tomorrow,

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and don't even bother
coming in without bathing.

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Oh brother.

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Oh brother,
who dig a window in the wall?

00:02:02.502 --> 00:02:03.942 align:center
Window was already there,

00:02:04.072 --> 00:02:06.502 align:center
there was so much dust
that it got mixed with the wall.

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But why is this cleaning being done?

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Did Jhaatu get a girl again?

00:02:12.482 --> 00:02:17.232 align:center
Good morning, grandmother... lovers.

00:02:19.712 --> 00:02:21.552 align:center
Jhaatu, is everything okay?

00:02:21.842 --> 00:02:24.562 align:center
-I saw a doormat outside.
-Jhaatu?

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Jatin, not Jhaatu.

00:02:28.122 --> 00:02:29.352 align:center
Who is this?

00:02:29.442 --> 00:02:33.222 align:center
Brother, why are you roaming like a 30
rupees curd sorbet in this white shirt?

00:02:33.582 --> 00:02:36.512 align:center
Only my shirt is loose,
not my character.

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Jhaatu, you haven't
abused in the last 13 words.

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It's not feeling right.

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You can make this a habit guys.

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"You guys".

00:02:48.112 --> 00:02:50.262 align:center
Jatin, is this poster okay?

00:02:51.602 --> 00:02:53.622 align:center
Yes, its okay. Works.

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Oh, he's contesting election.

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Whatever, it's still better
than that cringe of girls.

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Yes, you dumbs.

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Shit.

00:03:03.852 --> 00:03:06.862 align:center
I can't say even dumb.

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Friends,

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I, Jatin Kishore,

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is standing for the post of GISHA.

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-Did he said Disha?
-No, he said Isha.

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I said GISHA. I said GISHA.

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General Secretary of Hostel Affair

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The interviewer will ask as about the
salary as soon as looking at the resume.

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Should we discuss?

00:03:31.522 --> 00:03:35.222 align:center
Enough of 'Jhaatu drinks',
'Jhaatu betrays',

00:03:35.312 --> 00:03:37.282 align:center
'Jhaatu scratches his
balls in front of everyone'.

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O brother, when people will
think so negative of me

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then how can they vote for me?

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That is why,
from today till election day,

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within my 5 meter radius,

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no alcohol, cigarette,

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abusing, and even my
shadow should be far from me.

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And remember,

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I made you friends for this exact day.

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Ankit.

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Let's go.

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Thank you. That was amazing.

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You are the best.

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I mean I know...

00:04:16.682 --> 00:04:18.212 align:center
Last time we voted for a dumb guy,

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and see, no one has got a job.

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And he lost by 2 votes too.

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Assholes, you voted for me.

00:04:26.532 --> 00:04:29.662 align:center
And how will you get placed? The
whole wing's resume is exactly the same.

00:04:30.202 --> 00:04:32.513 align:center
And when the interviewer asks "where
do you see yourself in five years?"

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What do you say?

00:04:33.902 --> 00:04:36.372 align:center
Stand-up comedian, filmmaker.

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I landed all the three
jokes at tech-fest.

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And I have learned to
use the camera in manual mode,

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just wait for the art-cinema...

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-We will take it this way.
-Then you record his stand-up too.

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Brother why don't you become my hero?

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-Real hero is there.
-GISHA sir, greetings, greetings.

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You aren't even GISHA
and you're ignoring us.

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O my older brothers.

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-Greetings, brother.
-Do it nicely.

00:05:04.062 --> 00:05:07.472 align:center
I have just ignored your
abuses for the last seven years.

00:05:07.562 --> 00:05:10.212 align:center
Now, if I ignore anything
else than this then...

00:05:10.302 --> 00:05:12.782 align:center
Brother, you will kill it.
What are you saying?

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We have full confidence
that Jhaatu will win.

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You have our full support.

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And in the whole hostel,
who can give competition to Jhaatu,

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There's none as such.

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And it's important to make
a positive image in elections.

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Wow, Chanakya is also with us.

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Yes, stress is causing hair-fall.

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Stress for what?

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Jhaatu has almost won.
Who else is there?

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Brother has burnt cigarettes
and other boy's butts.

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But look at the symbol,
you will win for sure Jhaatu.

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Won't lose.

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Shridhar brother, please teach me.
I have my back exam tomorrow.

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And if you won't teach us, we'll fail.

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Sorry Shishupal,

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I'm going to fill the nominations form.

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Let's do one thing,
you come in the afternoon.

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What? You are going to
fill the election form alone?

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We will also come, for support.

00:06:08.702 --> 00:06:10.122 align:center
No, no. Not at all.

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It's not a right thing
to show power during politics.

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I'll go alone.
You focus on your studies.

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You wait brother, I'll call everyone.

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Deshpandey, Katrej,
Sambal, Lakshya, Pandit, everyone come.

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Shridhar brother is going
to fill the nomination form.

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And Kashyap, you bring the 'gulaal'.
Let's go.

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Jatin, you move forward.

00:06:30.242 --> 00:06:32.182 align:center
We are with you.

00:06:32.272 --> 00:06:33.582 align:center
Jatin, you move forward.

00:06:33.672 --> 00:06:35.352 align:center
We are with you.

00:06:35.442 --> 00:06:37.002 align:center
Jatin, you move forward.

00:06:37.092 --> 00:06:38.782 align:center
We are with you.

00:06:38.872 --> 00:06:40.382 align:center
Jatin, you move forward.

00:06:40.472 --> 00:06:42.032 align:center
-We are with you.
-Hey, hey.

00:06:42.122 --> 00:06:44.212 align:center
Jatin! Vote for Jatin.

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Mom, I'm studying to become PhD doctor,
someone else will treat your arthritis.

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Yes, I'll reach in the evening.
S4 Bogie.

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Just hang up.

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Jhaatu, at least you should have got the
print out. That too you took from me.

00:06:57.592 --> 00:07:01.412 align:center
Sorry, Rishi brother.
The website froze, that is why.

00:07:01.502 --> 00:07:02.762 align:center
The server was down.

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Where is this noise coming from?

00:07:07.662 --> 00:07:09.462 align:center
They might be drinking alcohol
and partying during study time.

00:07:09.552 --> 00:07:10.662 align:center
Everything will be stopped.

00:07:10.752 --> 00:07:13.072 align:center
Chirag, add this issue
to our manifesto too.

00:07:13.162 --> 00:07:14.642 align:center
-I added.
-Very nice.

00:07:15.082 --> 00:07:17.972 align:center
Manifesto's spelling
is wrong in your manifesto.

00:07:24.502 --> 00:07:26.492 align:center
They will become politician.

00:07:27.462 --> 00:07:28.422 align:center
Chirag,

00:07:28.752 --> 00:07:31.772 align:center
In Jatin Kishore, the spelling
of Kishore is of Kishore Kumar,

00:07:31.862 --> 00:07:33.232 align:center
or of Prashant Kishor?

00:07:35.882 --> 00:07:37.882 align:center
Just write Jatin, like Rajnikanth.

00:07:37.972 --> 00:07:39.462 align:center
Just like Dhanush.

00:07:40.072 --> 00:07:42.212 align:center
Wow. You see.

00:07:43.022 --> 00:07:45.332 align:center
But what can we do?
It's hostel election.

00:07:46.092 --> 00:07:48.302 align:center
Don't underestimate hostel election.

00:07:48.862 --> 00:07:51.592 align:center
This is much more intense
than a housing society elections

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and a little bit less
that US president elections.

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If in US president election,

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someone says, I'll bring
immigration laws, make me president,

00:08:01.292 --> 00:08:02.772 align:center
then the number of votes he'll get,

00:08:03.392 --> 00:08:05.292 align:center
he will get more by saying,

00:08:05.382 --> 00:08:09.052 align:center
that from tomorrow sweets are
free after food, come to mess everyone.

00:08:09.812 --> 00:08:12.202 align:center
The enthusiasm is
the same at both places.

00:08:12.772 --> 00:08:16.442 align:center
There are two common things
in Indian election and hostel election.

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False promises and true threats.

00:08:21.532 --> 00:08:24.222 align:center
And let me tell you,
the biggest difference?

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A true politician knows his politics,

00:08:28.902 --> 00:08:32.372 align:center
and they don't even know their syllabus.

00:08:34.452 --> 00:08:38.022 align:center
Who will lose?
A jackal. Who will win? Shridhar.

00:08:40.162 --> 00:08:43.572 align:center
Bullock, chicken, goat,
cow, only Shridhar brother will win.

00:08:45.142 --> 00:08:48.212 align:center
Gangadhar is Shaktiman,
Shridhar is everyone's heartbeat.

00:08:52.312 --> 00:08:53.412 align:center
Sir, form.

00:08:54.192 --> 00:08:55.602 align:center
Wow, Shridhar.

00:08:56.212 --> 00:08:57.802 align:center
The website was working?

00:09:00.162 --> 00:09:02.322 align:center
All the best, Shridhar.

00:09:03.042 --> 00:09:05.362 align:center
All the best to you too, Jatin Kishore.

00:09:07.082 --> 00:09:08.072 align:center
May the best win.

00:09:28.082 --> 00:09:29.252 align:center
Democracy means,

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not only me,
you all have to equally participate.

00:09:34.512 --> 00:09:37.922 align:center
So from today,
if anyone has any problem or doubt,

00:09:38.152 --> 00:09:40.252 align:center
everyone will put it
in this suggestion box.

00:09:40.492 --> 00:09:43.420 align:center
One more thing guys,
"is Ankita more hot or Divya?"

00:09:43.510 --> 00:09:45.212 align:center
don't ask questions like these.

00:09:45.302 --> 00:09:47.462 align:center
Because everyone knows
that Ankita is hotter.

00:09:49.792 --> 00:09:51.082 align:center
No one will ask.

00:09:52.462 --> 00:09:53.602 align:center
Thank you.

00:09:56.422 --> 00:09:59.142 align:center
I know what are your problems.

00:10:00.082 --> 00:10:02.182 align:center
Exam pressure, right?

00:10:02.362 --> 00:10:05.572 align:center
Anmol, open up,
there is a lot of pressure.

00:10:06.312 --> 00:10:08.212 align:center
Jatin will help.

00:10:08.622 --> 00:10:10.772 align:center
From today, till the date of exam,

00:10:10.862 --> 00:10:14.902 align:center
there will be a guy like
Chirag in all of your groups.

00:10:16.152 --> 00:10:17.452 align:center
Sachin!

00:10:17.542 --> 00:10:19.542 align:center
-Here.
-Take this, these are semester notes.

00:10:19.682 --> 00:10:21.722 align:center
All important questions
are marked in this.

00:10:21.812 --> 00:10:23.262 align:center
Vote for Jatin.

00:10:23.352 --> 00:10:24.792 align:center
Vote for Jatin.

00:10:25.232 --> 00:10:26.442 align:center
Don't you wipe with it.

00:10:27.002 --> 00:10:28.482 align:center
So friends, don't forget.

00:10:29.102 --> 00:10:30.942 align:center
Vote for...

00:10:34.132 --> 00:10:35.362 align:center
Jatin.

00:10:35.852 --> 00:10:37.392 align:center
-Vote for!
-Jatin.

00:10:37.482 --> 00:10:39.092 align:center
-Vote for!
-Jatin.

00:10:42.982 --> 00:10:44.552 align:center
Vote for Jatin.

00:10:49.962 --> 00:10:52.172 align:center
Sorry, can I get one more?

00:10:52.442 --> 00:10:56.612 align:center
Friends, two things irritate
us on the night of exam.

00:10:56.992 --> 00:10:59.412 align:center
First, the hunt for study material,

00:10:59.592 --> 00:11:01.732 align:center
and second, the quest to jerk off.

00:11:01.962 --> 00:11:04.382 align:center
Now, I can't do anything
for the second one,

00:11:04.472 --> 00:11:07.682 align:center
but if I become GISHA then,

00:11:08.292 --> 00:11:13.822 align:center
on the night of exam, tea stall
and xerox shop will be open all night.

00:11:13.912 --> 00:11:15.582 align:center
Applause!

00:11:16.642 --> 00:11:19.582 align:center
So, if we all drink alcohol in the day,

00:11:19.672 --> 00:11:23.232 align:center
and tea at night, won't we
get acidity the next day in exam?

00:11:23.322 --> 00:11:27.342 align:center
We shouldn't pick such a careless GISHA.

00:11:27.432 --> 00:11:31.292 align:center
We should choose a GISHA,
who can understand our pain,

00:11:31.652 --> 00:11:34.702 align:center
who considers us friends,
whose name should start with Shri,

00:11:34.792 --> 00:11:37.212 align:center
and end with 'Dhar'. Vote for Shridhar.

00:11:37.302 --> 00:11:38.682 align:center
Vote for Shridhar.

00:11:38.772 --> 00:11:41.122 align:center
-Vote for Shridhar.
-Vote for Shridhar.

00:11:42.762 --> 00:11:44.862 align:center
Asshole.

00:11:44.952 --> 00:11:46.342 align:center
Vote for Shridhar.

00:11:46.432 --> 00:11:49.272 align:center
Vote for Shridhar.

00:11:49.362 --> 00:11:52.132 align:center
Vote for Shridhar.

00:11:52.222 --> 00:11:53.842 align:center
Vote for Shridhar.

00:11:55.612 --> 00:11:57.322 align:center
If anyone asks, then tell us,

00:11:57.412 --> 00:11:59.742 align:center
I taught you to prove Pythagoras
theorem in first year.

00:11:59.832 --> 00:12:01.702 align:center
But that is taught in 8th standard.

00:12:01.792 --> 00:12:03.082 align:center
What are you talking about?

00:12:21.672 --> 00:12:23.212 align:center
Not so fast.

00:12:23.492 --> 00:12:25.122 align:center
Slowly breathe in.

00:12:25.612 --> 00:12:27.772 align:center
Like, when you smoke a cigarette,

00:12:28.322 --> 00:12:30.602 align:center
like that, slowly.

00:12:34.952 --> 00:12:39.312 align:center
What is going on here? I gave you notes
and told you to study. Exams are coming.

00:12:39.402 --> 00:12:40.892 align:center
And I told them not to.

00:12:42.172 --> 00:12:44.792 align:center
Students are so stressed
before the exams.

00:12:45.572 --> 00:12:46.612 align:center
How would you know?

00:12:47.572 --> 00:12:50.512 align:center
To get rid of that stress,
we need to do yoga.

00:12:51.152 --> 00:12:55.462 align:center
So stop entering like plastic
in this ocean of knowledge.

00:12:55.742 --> 00:12:58.732 align:center
Hey, Jatin.
What kind of notes did you gave?

00:12:58.822 --> 00:13:01.492 align:center
I'm a Civil student, why did
you gave me the notes of mechanical.?

00:13:01.582 --> 00:13:03.512 align:center
On top of that,
all the pages are stuck together.

00:13:03.602 --> 00:13:06.822 align:center
I separated them all night by licking.
My saliva has dried up.

00:13:07.262 --> 00:13:09.912 align:center
You haven't been elected and
you have started doing dumb things.

00:13:10.002 --> 00:13:13.722 align:center
Jhaatu, get lost otherwise
I'll beat your butt in this pose.

00:13:13.812 --> 00:13:14.742 align:center
No.

00:13:16.422 --> 00:13:17.802 align:center
Peace.

00:13:19.592 --> 00:13:21.952 align:center
Jatin, please pass away.

00:13:22.222 --> 00:13:24.462 align:center
Otherwise I'll complaint to your mom.

00:13:37.092 --> 00:13:38.152 align:center
Is it tight?

00:13:38.242 --> 00:13:41.002 align:center
Don't worry, this will show off my body.

00:13:41.282 --> 00:13:43.552 align:center
Okay, Jatin Kishore,
what are your strengths?

00:13:43.642 --> 00:13:46.112 align:center
I'm very hardworking,
I pay attention to minute details,

00:13:46.202 --> 00:13:48.392 align:center
and I'm very persistent
till I attain my goals.

00:13:48.482 --> 00:13:49.862 align:center
-Exceptional.
-Thank you very much.

00:13:49.952 --> 00:13:53.042 align:center
No, no. With words like exceptional,
consistency, team work

00:13:53.132 --> 00:13:55.472 align:center
say anything with 'and' or 'to',
and the rest we will take care of.

00:13:55.562 --> 00:13:58.312 align:center
It will happen.
Our brothers are sitting in soap box.

00:13:58.402 --> 00:13:59.902 align:center
They won't ask anything hard,
I'll handle it.

00:13:59.992 --> 00:14:02.572 align:center
Jatin!

00:14:02.762 --> 00:14:04.162 align:center
Come on.

00:14:04.252 --> 00:14:06.942 align:center
Jatin! Jatin! Jatin!

00:14:15.519 --> 00:14:17.912 align:center
Jatin! Jatin! Jatin!

00:14:17.992 --> 00:14:21.712 align:center
Jatin! Jatin! Jatin!

00:14:21.802 --> 00:14:25.192 align:center
Jatin! Jatin! Jatin!

00:14:26.792 --> 00:14:28.362 align:center
Welcome to the Soapbox.

00:14:29.082 --> 00:14:33.302 align:center
Candidates, please proceed
and give your statement of purpose.

00:14:33.392 --> 00:14:35.462 align:center
Come on Jatin.

00:14:37.425 --> 00:14:39.532 align:center
Jatin! Jatin! Jatin!

00:14:39.622 --> 00:14:41.962 align:center
I am Jatin Kishore,

00:14:42.242 --> 00:14:47.932 align:center
from Hostel 3, contesting
for General Secretary Hostel Affair.

00:14:50.372 --> 00:14:52.922 align:center
Jatin! Jatin!

00:15:00.642 --> 00:15:02.022 align:center
Hello everyone.

00:15:02.452 --> 00:15:04.012 align:center
My name is Shridhar Vatsa.

00:15:05.902 --> 00:15:11.622 align:center
Former mess secretary, present
PPO holder and your future GISHA.

00:15:18.182 --> 00:15:20.782 align:center
What will you do for the
hostel if you are made GISHA?

00:15:20.872 --> 00:15:22.742 align:center
We have the student's concern.

00:15:23.242 --> 00:15:26.022 align:center
They all put their concerns
in the suggestion box.

00:15:26.372 --> 00:15:30.052 align:center
For example sir, someone is not
getting hot water at 8 in the morning.

00:15:30.372 --> 00:15:34.092 align:center
There is network issue
from room number 403 to 412.

00:15:34.182 --> 00:15:35.102 align:center
True.

00:15:35.192 --> 00:15:36.582 align:center
Someone is finding Divya hot,

00:15:36.672 --> 00:15:38.002 align:center
I'm really sorry Sir.

00:15:38.652 --> 00:15:40.002 align:center
He said Divya, right?

00:15:40.112 --> 00:15:43.977 align:center
Sir, I mean,
me and my team will give their 100%

00:15:44.067 --> 00:15:45.672 align:center
and resolve everyone's concerns

00:15:50.432 --> 00:15:53.682 align:center
What will you do for the
hostel if you are made GISHA?

00:15:53.772 --> 00:15:56.862 align:center
Not just for the hostel,
I will do it for the whole college.

00:15:56.952 --> 00:16:00.202 align:center
Not for the college,
for the whole university... pardon me.

00:16:00.292 --> 00:16:02.332 align:center
I will die for my country.

00:16:02.422 --> 00:16:04.362 align:center
Great!

00:16:04.452 --> 00:16:06.812 align:center
Quiet! Quiet!

00:16:07.602 --> 00:16:10.502 align:center
O hero? First you give
this interview properly.

00:16:11.112 --> 00:16:12.250 align:center
I'm saying this for everyone,

00:16:12.340 --> 00:16:15.402 align:center
either take this seriously
or get the fuck out of here.

00:16:17.652 --> 00:16:19.522 align:center
What are your weaknesses?

00:16:20.012 --> 00:16:21.592 align:center
Sir, I'm over-ambitious.

00:16:23.492 --> 00:16:25.912 align:center
But I think,
looking at the condition of hostel,

00:16:25.992 --> 00:16:27.952 align:center
that I should remain over-ambitious.

00:16:30.932 --> 00:16:34.142 align:center
I'm hard-working,
I pay attention to minute details

00:16:34.232 --> 00:16:37.012 align:center
I'm persistent till I attain my goals.

00:16:37.102 --> 00:16:39.912 align:center
Hello, I'm asking for weaknesses.

00:16:40.002 --> 00:16:41.382 align:center
Oh, weakness.

00:16:41.842 --> 00:16:44.992 align:center
Physics, chemistry,
and sometimes my knees hurt.

00:16:50.392 --> 00:16:52.522 align:center
Tell me that why should I vote for you?

00:16:52.612 --> 00:16:56.162 align:center
With all due respect Sir,
I think I don't need to tell you.

00:16:57.992 --> 00:16:59.772 align:center
Because you are not eligible to vote.

00:17:00.442 --> 00:17:04.942 align:center
But sir, the eligible very well know
that why to vote for Shridhar Vatsa.

00:17:06.532 --> 00:17:08.672 align:center
Shridhar! Shridhar!

00:17:08.762 --> 00:17:10.502 align:center
Shridhar! Shridhar!

00:17:10.592 --> 00:17:11.942 align:center
How many students are there in H3?

00:17:12.032 --> 00:17:13.202 align:center
-250.
-250?

00:17:13.292 --> 00:17:14.812 align:center
-275.
-275?

00:17:14.902 --> 00:17:16.092 align:center
Trick question,

00:17:16.652 --> 00:17:18.582 align:center
No one studies in H3, sir.

00:17:19.162 --> 00:17:20.269 align:center
Asshole,

00:17:20.359 --> 00:17:23.232 align:center
you don't even know the strength
of H3 and you want to become GISHA?

00:17:26.622 --> 00:17:27.792 align:center
378, Sir.

00:17:31.262 --> 00:17:35.512 align:center
Actually, I'm very surprised
Shridhar that you gave a wrong answer?

00:17:35.602 --> 00:17:38.202 align:center
Because the answer is 379.

00:17:39.372 --> 00:17:40.420 align:center
I know that Sir,

00:17:41.052 --> 00:17:43.992 align:center
actually I haven't involved
Jatin Kishore in this,

00:17:44.502 --> 00:17:46.952 align:center
I think he does not deserve
to live in this hostel.

00:17:47.419 --> 00:17:49.172 align:center
Shut up!

00:17:51.922 --> 00:17:54.292 align:center
How will you defeat H4 in fest?

00:17:54.382 --> 00:17:57.212 align:center
I will work hard and pay attention...

00:17:57.302 --> 00:17:58.597 align:center
Get lost!

00:18:00.092 --> 00:18:01.902 align:center
Listen, shut up for a moment.

00:18:02.622 --> 00:18:05.582 align:center
Think about this, if your hostel's GISHA

00:18:05.672 --> 00:18:09.752 align:center
will be called as "Hey Jhaatu!"
how will you feel like?

00:18:11.252 --> 00:18:13.342 align:center
I'm trying to change my image Sir.

00:18:13.572 --> 00:18:14.852 align:center
You will change your image?

00:18:14.942 --> 00:18:19.542 align:center
Brother, in 1947 Veenu
Mankad did one run out.

00:18:19.632 --> 00:18:22.882 align:center
Even if today Ashwin does a run out,
it's known as Mankading.

00:18:22.972 --> 00:18:25.613 align:center
And you asshole,
you will change your image in 2 days?

00:18:25.703 --> 00:18:27.712 align:center
You haven't changed
your inner since 3 years.

00:18:27.802 --> 00:18:30.052 align:center
Jhaatu! Jhaatu!

00:18:30.142 --> 00:18:32.262 align:center
Jhaatu! Jhaatu!

00:18:32.352 --> 00:18:36.132 align:center
Jhaatu! Jhaatu!

00:18:36.222 --> 00:18:39.842 align:center
Jhaatu! Jhaatu!

00:18:42.672 --> 00:18:45.452 align:center
Brother, what happened?
You're not feeling bad are you?

00:18:45.542 --> 00:18:47.842 align:center
No Sir, what to feel bad with friends?

00:18:47.932 --> 00:18:51.732 align:center
You should feel bad asshole.
Are we dumb to be sitting here?

00:18:51.822 --> 00:18:54.572 align:center
Do one thing,
put this sad back story in your butt

00:18:54.662 --> 00:18:57.392 align:center
and go to any reality
show and beg for sympathy.

00:18:57.482 --> 00:19:00.532 align:center
Because we are not going
to vote for you. We are not dumb.

00:19:00.622 --> 00:19:02.602 align:center
I'm not going to vote for him.

00:19:04.522 --> 00:19:08.042 align:center
Shridhar! Shridhar!

00:19:08.132 --> 00:19:12.374 align:center
Shridhar! Shridhar!

00:19:50.712 --> 00:19:51.892 align:center
Shridhar?

00:19:52.782 --> 00:19:53.732 align:center
What is the bother?

00:19:53.822 --> 00:19:54.962 align:center
-Brother!
-Asshole!

00:19:55.052 --> 00:19:56.802 align:center
-My new rules.
-Yes.

00:19:57.562 --> 00:19:59.222 align:center
What Keeda?

00:19:59.622 --> 00:20:02.352 align:center
Stand straight. Stand straight.

00:20:03.022 --> 00:20:08.322 align:center
Asshole. You were crawling
behind me on the day of nomination.

00:20:09.612 --> 00:20:11.012 align:center
Betrayed me?

00:20:11.392 --> 00:20:14.802 align:center
I did? You were talking like that.

00:20:14.892 --> 00:20:17.142 align:center
-Did you listen to yourself?
-Eyes down.

00:20:17.472 --> 00:20:19.992 align:center
Eyes down when you talk to me.

00:20:20.362 --> 00:20:22.182 align:center
I'm not dumb.

00:20:23.452 --> 00:20:28.602 align:center
Asshole, If I lose then it will
be because of dumb defector supporters.

00:20:28.692 --> 00:20:30.162 align:center
Do you understand?

00:20:31.322 --> 00:20:33.242 align:center
I was not the only
one to change my colors.

00:20:33.662 --> 00:20:36.442 align:center
You are not fitting in this shirt,
and this clean image.

00:20:37.322 --> 00:20:38.775 align:center
I don't know why are you trying to

00:20:38.865 --> 00:20:40.892 align:center
become what Shridhar
is already since 20 years.

00:20:42.612 --> 00:20:46.212 align:center
Maybe the hostel doesn't know
that how big of an asshole you are,

00:20:46.752 --> 00:20:51.162 align:center
but how big Jhaatu is in the hostel,
everyone knows.

00:20:53.802 --> 00:20:56.922 align:center
And yes, not every bug is bad.

00:20:57.152 --> 00:21:00.282 align:center
Some become superheroes
after getting bit by one.

00:21:51.392 --> 00:21:54.982 align:center
Good morning, great grandmother fuckers.

00:21:55.292 --> 00:21:59.872 align:center
Whatever happened before interval,
flush it down. Because now, I

00:22:01.952 --> 00:22:03.502 align:center
pee fire.

00:22:03.932 --> 00:22:06.059 align:center
Chirag, you will target Nerds.

00:22:06.149 --> 00:22:09.152 align:center
Jaat, you will target sports
people and Ankit you, jerk offs.

00:22:09.242 --> 00:22:10.872 align:center
That means everyone.

00:22:11.162 --> 00:22:15.302 align:center
But before that,
I want to improve my image again.

00:22:15.542 --> 00:22:16.942 align:center
I mean, worsen it.

00:22:30.022 --> 00:22:33.202 align:center
Wow, today everyone started before me.

00:22:33.292 --> 00:22:36.542 align:center
Shridhar, your yoga is best. Best.

00:22:36.992 --> 00:22:38.962 align:center
Everything feels easy.

00:22:39.802 --> 00:22:42.532 align:center
Now, everyone open your eyes slowly.

00:22:42.822 --> 00:22:44.522 align:center
That is hard.

00:22:44.892 --> 00:22:49.682 align:center
That party animal gave
us two drinks to reduce stress.

00:22:51.212 --> 00:22:53.452 align:center
Aren't you ashamed coming here drunk?

00:22:53.942 --> 00:22:56.902 align:center
And who is that uncouth guy
who is showing his foot's middle finger?

00:22:57.262 --> 00:22:59.942 align:center
He is the party animal.

00:23:02.192 --> 00:23:03.472 align:center
Will you drink?

00:23:03.702 --> 00:23:05.712 align:center
Slowly take a sip,

00:23:06.691 --> 00:23:07.832 align:center
and drink fast.

00:23:08.052 --> 00:23:10.322 align:center
Like you drink your anger.

00:23:10.632 --> 00:23:13.502 align:center
-Cheers, guys!
-Cheers!

00:23:21.849 --> 00:23:23.675 align:center
Come on!

00:23:28.952 --> 00:23:30.502 align:center
You must be very happy today.

00:23:30.792 --> 00:23:33.802 align:center
Man has made computer,
not computer has made the man.

00:23:33.892 --> 00:23:35.092 align:center
You want job?

00:23:35.382 --> 00:23:38.782 align:center
How much you make us work?
Sheru, bring biryani.

00:23:39.222 --> 00:23:42.572 align:center
Enough, enough.

00:23:43.082 --> 00:23:46.112 align:center
H3's boys,
everyone whatsapp him your roll numbers.

00:23:46.972 --> 00:23:49.512 align:center
He will put proxy in
different voices for everyone.

00:23:49.602 --> 00:23:52.112 align:center
And no professor will ever know.

00:23:57.322 --> 00:23:59.222 align:center
-Roll number 5.
-Present Sir.

00:23:59.312 --> 00:24:00.942 align:center
-Roll number 6.
-Present Sir.

00:24:01.032 --> 00:24:02.972 align:center
-Roll number 7.
-Present Sir.

00:24:03.102 --> 00:24:05.112 align:center
-Roll number 8. -Students
have stopped attending the lectures.

00:24:06.172 --> 00:24:08.052 align:center
It's wrong what is happening
with hostel's students.

00:24:08.452 --> 00:24:09.732 align:center
We have to do something.

00:24:10.852 --> 00:24:12.697 align:center
Is our beta version
ready of 'Padha De Bhai?

00:24:12.787 --> 00:24:13.692 align:center
Yes.

00:24:13.782 --> 00:24:14.792 align:center
Release it.

00:24:14.942 --> 00:24:16.842 align:center
-Shridhar Vatsa?
-Present Sir.

00:24:19.202 --> 00:24:21.532 align:center
Guys, Shridhar's study app.

00:24:21.732 --> 00:24:23.242 align:center
The whole hostel is studying from here.

00:24:23.332 --> 00:24:25.522 align:center
He's getting praised. What should we do?

00:24:26.542 --> 00:24:27.912 align:center
It's okay.

00:24:28.372 --> 00:24:32.722 align:center
If the whole hostel is at one place,
then it's good.

00:24:33.932 --> 00:24:35.192 align:center
Ankit?

00:25:02.722 --> 00:25:04.512 align:center
Shridhar?

00:25:04.702 --> 00:25:08.532 align:center
There are many videos getting
uploaded from an ID named 'cooldude69'.

00:25:08.622 --> 00:25:10.632 align:center
The entire attraction is on them.

00:25:10.722 --> 00:25:12.132 align:center
Which lecture's videos?

00:25:12.372 --> 00:25:14.842 align:center
Hot teacher teaching thermodynamics?

00:25:21.022 --> 00:25:22.392 align:center
And why have you liked this?

00:25:23.772 --> 00:25:27.452 align:center
There was BDSM in it. I couldn't
do anything, my hands were tied.

00:25:30.072 --> 00:25:32.452 align:center
We paid a lot of penalty of 500 rupees.

00:25:33.122 --> 00:25:35.912 align:center
Now it's the time to have
penalty kick of 500 rupees.

00:25:36.392 --> 00:25:39.322 align:center
I have organized a football
tournament for you all.

00:25:39.412 --> 00:25:42.552 align:center
Every student will
put 500 rupees in this box,

00:25:42.722 --> 00:25:47.472 align:center
And whichever team wins,
that team will take all of the money.

00:25:47.562 --> 00:25:50.172 align:center
Let's start this program.

00:25:50.262 --> 00:25:51.912 align:center
Shridhar! Shridhar!

00:25:52.002 --> 00:25:53.512 align:center
Shridhar! Shridhar!

00:25:53.602 --> 00:25:55.122 align:center
Shridhar! Shridhar!

00:25:55.212 --> 00:25:56.982 align:center
Shridhar! Shridhar!

00:25:58.322 --> 00:25:59.462 align:center
Done.

00:26:00.672 --> 00:26:03.272 align:center
Shridhar brother,
I'm very sick, brother.

00:26:03.362 --> 00:26:06.232 align:center
I want to go to hospital,
please give me my 500 rupees.

00:26:06.792 --> 00:26:09.562 align:center
Keep this money and I will
take you to doctor, don't worry.

00:26:09.652 --> 00:26:11.642 align:center
No brother, I'll go.

00:26:16.172 --> 00:26:18.472 align:center
[Indistinct chatter]

00:26:20.042 --> 00:26:21.892 align:center
[Indistinct chatter]

00:26:21.982 --> 00:26:23.902 align:center
[Indistinct chatter]

00:26:30.852 --> 00:26:32.486 align:center
Jhaatu?

00:26:34.042 --> 00:26:38.822 align:center
I earned money by flipping
policeman's vehicles in my village.

00:26:40.462 --> 00:26:42.852 align:center
I was the boy in gaming parlour.

00:26:43.212 --> 00:26:47.394 align:center
But there I learned,
how to flip big elections.

00:26:48.522 --> 00:26:49.601 align:center
By giving our support.

00:26:51.612 --> 00:26:55.022 align:center
Do you want my support?

00:26:56.142 --> 00:26:57.862 align:center
Vote for Jhaatu.

00:26:57.952 --> 00:26:59.242 align:center
Vote for Jhaatu.

00:26:59.332 --> 00:27:00.632 align:center
Vote for...

00:27:00.722 --> 00:27:03.202 align:center
Vote for Jhaatu.

00:27:03.292 --> 00:27:05.222 align:center
Vote for Jhaatu.

00:27:05.312 --> 00:27:07.652 align:center
Jhaatu! Jhaatu!

00:27:11.982 --> 00:27:15.582 align:center
Wait a minute, who Jhaatu?
He has a small dick.

00:27:15.672 --> 00:27:17.692 align:center
He doesn't even have a dick.

00:27:17.782 --> 00:27:18.952 align:center
Jhaatu is small brother.

00:27:19.042 --> 00:27:21.112 align:center
If he had a dick,
we would have called him dickhead.

00:27:24.098 --> 00:27:26.392 align:center
How can Jhaatu win?

00:27:26.482 --> 00:27:28.022 align:center
What should we do about him brother?

00:27:29.722 --> 00:27:31.442 align:center
Now he is at my level.

00:27:31.692 --> 00:27:34.632 align:center
Let's go and meet his... mom.

00:27:34.962 --> 00:27:38.042 align:center
Chirag, get his emergency
contact from registry.

00:27:38.932 --> 00:27:41.392 align:center
Sorry, I have stopped
talking to parents.

00:27:43.452 --> 00:27:45.792 align:center
Hello, is Shridhar there?

00:27:45.882 --> 00:27:46.982 align:center
Who is this?

00:27:47.162 --> 00:27:51.002 align:center
Uncle, I'm his friend.
Actually, he's standing in election

00:27:51.092 --> 00:27:53.112 align:center
so I wanted to congratulate him.

00:27:53.202 --> 00:27:54.072 align:center
What?

00:27:54.162 --> 00:27:57.832 align:center
That rascal is standing in election?
He can't study properly.

00:27:57.922 --> 00:28:02.092 align:center
I paid so much money to put
him in college, and he's doing this?

00:28:02.352 --> 00:28:05.062 align:center
You wait, I will tell him.

00:28:05.152 --> 00:28:07.742 align:center
He won't be fighting any election,
he's dead now.

00:28:08.242 --> 00:28:09.172 align:center
Understood?

00:28:09.262 --> 00:28:11.742 align:center
[Indistinct voice]

00:28:13.037 --> 00:28:15.461 align:center
[Indistinct voice]

00:28:20.092 --> 00:28:21.632 align:center
I will make sure...

00:28:21.722 --> 00:28:24.692 align:center
I will make sure that each
student excels in every field.

00:28:24.782 --> 00:28:28.222 align:center
And such responsibility
should not be given in such hands.

00:28:28.392 --> 00:28:33.662 align:center
And I will make sure that such party
animals are eradicated from the college.

00:28:33.842 --> 00:28:36.392 align:center
I get that we all are animals,

00:28:36.732 --> 00:28:40.212 align:center
but this hostel needs
non veg eating animal lovers.

00:28:40.302 --> 00:28:42.652 align:center
Not a ring master, Mr. Shridhar.

00:28:44.732 --> 00:28:49.102 align:center
He is not the right candidate for
you guys, he can only do hooliganism.

00:28:49.192 --> 00:28:51.108 align:center
If I had done hooliganism,

00:28:51.198 --> 00:28:53.112 align:center
would you have been able
to reach this debate round?

00:28:53.592 --> 00:28:56.612 align:center
As much you have hair on your head, I
have more hands than that over my head.

00:29:00.442 --> 00:29:05.192 align:center
Guys, guys. He is not even maintaining
the decor... decorum of the stage.

00:29:05.652 --> 00:29:07.742 align:center
At least try to speak in English.

00:29:10.152 --> 00:29:13.544 align:center
Oh, My darling.

00:29:14.062 --> 00:29:17.762 align:center
I have came here from Jhagua
to do B.tech, not English Honors.

00:29:20.012 --> 00:29:22.992 align:center
I'll not only be your leader,
I'll be your best friend.

00:29:23.172 --> 00:29:27.842 align:center
Has anyone felt the
need for a friend in hostel?

00:29:27.932 --> 00:29:29.272 align:center
No!

00:29:29.362 --> 00:29:34.732 align:center
I got asked that what qualities
were there in me to become GISHA?

00:29:35.192 --> 00:29:36.302 align:center
I'll tell today,

00:29:37.402 --> 00:29:41.942 align:center
I, Jatin Kishore,
who's called Jhaatu here with respect.

00:29:42.212 --> 00:29:45.422 align:center
I, will stand with you at every point,

00:29:46.392 --> 00:29:48.592 align:center
while puking after drinking alcohol.

00:29:48.982 --> 00:29:53.342 align:center
while making chits on exam night.
While giving intro to a girl.

00:29:54.082 --> 00:29:56.952 align:center
We need a family here in hostel.

00:29:57.682 --> 00:30:00.592 align:center
For professors, we go to the college.

00:30:02.452 --> 00:30:07.378 align:center
I will not make you study,
I will make you have fun.

00:30:15.912 --> 00:30:17.432 align:center
Jhaatu! Jhaatu!

00:30:17.522 --> 00:30:18.972 align:center
Jhaatu!

00:30:19.062 --> 00:30:21.092 align:center
Jhaatu won! Jhaatu won!

00:30:21.182 --> 00:30:26.792 align:center
See? It's not necessary that only those
win in election who are good at work.

00:30:27.492 --> 00:30:30.372 align:center
Sometimes those win the election
who are good at elections.

00:30:31.272 --> 00:30:32.260 align:center
By the way,

00:30:32.350 --> 00:30:36.822 align:center
we voters are not that innocent as
much as we villainize the politicians.

00:30:37.502 --> 00:30:42.142 align:center
Because,
during a discussion with friends,

00:30:42.382 --> 00:30:45.042 align:center
we give some reasons of
why we supported a candidate.

00:30:45.932 --> 00:30:48.852 align:center
But the real reason,
for which you voted,

00:30:49.592 --> 00:30:51.112 align:center
only you know that.

00:30:51.972 --> 00:30:55.632 align:center
Sometimes, you can't even say
these reasons in front of your friends.

00:30:55.892 --> 00:30:57.042 align:center
Right?

00:30:57.382 --> 00:30:59.042 align:center
So bottom line,

00:30:59.642 --> 00:31:02.762 align:center
the people should be a
part of politics in democracy.

00:31:03.682 --> 00:31:05.692 align:center
Not of politics of democracy.

00:31:06.622 --> 00:31:07.492 align:center
Tell me one thing?

00:31:08.592 --> 00:31:10.372 align:center
Who did you support of these two?

00:31:12.522 --> 00:31:14.092 align:center
Jhaatu! Jhaatu!

00:31:14.182 --> 00:31:15.442 align:center
Jhaatu! Jhaatu!

00:31:15.532 --> 00:31:16.762 align:center
Move on!

00:31:16.932 --> 00:31:18.182 align:center
Jhaatu!

00:31:18.502 --> 00:31:20.682 align:center
Hey Ankit, you forgot?

00:31:20.822 --> 00:31:22.682 align:center
Give me my 101 rupees.

00:31:22.772 --> 00:31:26.322 align:center
I won the election, but you
still didn't break up with Akanksha.

00:31:28.692 --> 00:31:32.592 align:center
He's so cute, it's good
that you didn't break up with him.

00:31:32.682 --> 00:31:35.052 align:center
As if he'll break up with Akanksha.
n't break up with him.